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Old 11-09-2001, 09:06 PM   #1
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Echo's Kitchen Disaster

*THE SCENE: Echo's kitchen. She and the lads are going to bake cookies for the PLEBA girls.*

ECHO: Okay, everybody gets to do their bit. Edge, you mix together the butter and the eggs. Adam...where's Adam?

*Adam enters.*

ADAM: Hey Echo, your mom has some nice clothes.

ECHO: Adam, that's my mom's best skirt! You take those clothes off right this instant!

ADAM: Yes, ma'am!

ECHO: No, I mean...put them back in my mom's closet! (He leaves and returns in his OWN skirt) That's better. Now get those cookie sheets greased up.

ADAM: With pleasure.

ECHO: Bono, what you need to do is sift together the flour and baking soda and sugar...where's the sugar?

*Larry enters, holding a cornish game hen.*

LARRY: Who wants my meat?

ECHO: Larry, that's Mona's joke!

LARRY: It is? Wait a minute...(pulls out clipboard and examnes it) Isn't this Tuesday?

ECHO: It's Friday.

LARRY: Oops. Okay, hold on...(exits, then comes back with a bag of sugar) Alright, who wants a little sugar in their bowl?

ADAM: WHat is this cardboard stand-up of me doing here?

ECHO: We..uh...weren't expecting you.

LARRY: Where's the silverware? (Opens the junk drawer) Wow, look at all the buttons! I could use these! (He grabs a handful of oddball buttons and goes into the sewing room to attach them.)

ECHO: Edge, where's your kitten? It was here a minute ago...

EDGE: (shrugs)

ECHO: Well it's gotta be around here...OH NO! (The kitten is on the counter, licking the butter) THE CAT IS LICKING THE BUTTER!!! All my grandmother's worst fears are coming true!!!

ADAM: That's not so bad...Bono was licking it earlier.

*Larry returns with his shirt buttoned up with six buttons: two black, one white, one blue, one pink and heart-shaped, and one two inches in diameter.*

LARRY: Look at that! Good as new!

ECHO: *Sigh* I'll be right back, (picks up the kitten) I'm gonna go put the kitten away until we're done cooking.

*Animatronic Edge comes running up.*

ECHO: Edge, you can play with your kitten later! I'm just gonna put it in the bedroom.

*He's pointing frantically at the kitchen. Echo doesn't understand. He grabs her by the wrist and pulls her into the kitchen, just as the smoke alarm goes off.*

LARRY: (Yelling over the alarm) Bono accidentally set Cardboard Adam on fire!

ADAM: Accidentally, my arse! That was deliberate - and might I add TYPICAL - hostility towards the bass player!

ECHO: Well don't just STAND THERE you idiots! Put him out!

*Bono picks up Cardboard Adam and beats him repeatedly against the refrigerator to put out the flames. When he's done there's burnt cardboard everywhere, and ashes are still floating down. There is perfect silence, broken after fifteen long seconds.*

BONO: Um.....When the cookies are done baking can we put frosting on them?



------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


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The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
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Old 11-09-2001, 09:17 PM   #2
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rotflmfao! echo, you are hilarious!

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Old 11-09-2001, 09:18 PM   #3
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The same thing happened at my house, up till the cat licking the butter part....

ADAM: That's OK. Bono was licking it earlier

EDGE: WWWWWWHHHHHHHAAAAAAATTTT????? Bono? SAY it ain't SO!

BONO: *is opening cabinets* Got any cranberry sauce?

LARRY: He was talking about the butter, wanker. What did you THINK he meant, Edge?

EDGE: Oh...yes....of course....BUTTER...heheh...*Ahem*

MONA: *enters randomly* *hangs camo hat on Adam's head*

ADAM: Hey! What th--?

MONA: Oh...I thought you were...never mind...
Hey hey! WHAT'S COOKIN, GOOOOOOOD LOOKIN?! *approaches Bono*

BONO: We're baking cookies.

MONA: Need any help?

LARRY: Well-- as soon as he spoke, his newly replaced buttons went flying off
Aw, feck it all to heck!

ADAM: Spoons! Spoons!! *makes a nest of spoons*

BONO: Do we have...chocolate chips?

MONA: Of course we do! We have...everything...*swiped everything off the counter in a massive sweep of her arm*

BONO: Oh...careful now...you knocked over a few--

ANIMATRONIC EDGE: *uses massive robot strength to help Mona lift Bono onto counter*

Wow. Well now I couldn't possibly finish that! *mind wanders to strange and wonderful places* heheh

~PHONA~
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Old 11-09-2001, 09:20 PM   #4
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*lol*

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Old 11-09-2001, 09:25 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally posted by Echo:
ADAM: Accidentally, my arse! That was deliberate - and might I add TYPICAL - hostility towards the bass player!



LOL!! Great story, Echo!


[This message has been edited by Ana (edited 11-09-2001).]
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Old 11-09-2001, 09:40 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by WildHonee:
ADAM: Spoons! Spoons!! *makes a nest of spoons*

~PHONA~

OMG I CANT BELIEVE I WROTE A WHOLE SCRIPT IN THE BLEEDIN' KITCHEN AND I DIDN'T WRITE A SINGLE WORD ABOUT ADAM AND HIS SPOONS! IN THE KITCHEN!

*runs away sobbing in embarrassment*



------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
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Old 11-09-2001, 09:46 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally posted by Echo:

OMG I CANT BELIEVE I WROTE A WHOLE SCRIPT IN THE BLEEDIN' KITCHEN AND I DIDN'T WRITE A SINGLE WORD ABOUT ADAM AND HIS SPOONS! IN THE KITCHEN!

*runs away sobbing in embarrassment*
lol!


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Old 11-09-2001, 10:14 PM   #8
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Mona & Bono: *occupied on counter*

Larry: Shite! Oh, bloody HELL!! Get a ROOM!

Buttons: *pop* *pop*

Edge-bot: *bluuuuuuush* *quickly
averts eyes*

Julie: *enters* HOLY GUACAMOLE! *tosses a sheet, which magically appeared in her hands, over them* did he spill more cranberry sauce on him?

Edge-bot: *looks around with a concerned look*

Julie: oh, you miss your kitten? well, i don't think it's allowed in the kitchen right now, but..... *opens refridgerator, pulls out a head of lettuce* here. how's this?

Edge-bot:*face brightens and a huge smile spreads across face* *grabs head of lettuce and immediately begins to cuddle with it and pet it*

*ding*

Adam: cookies are done!

Bono & Mona: *in unison, from beneath the sheet* COOKIES??

Larry: time to decorate! i'm putting me buttons on mine. ...might as well put 'em to SOME use. *decorate*

Adam: can i eat mine with a spoon?

Edge-bot: *attempts to feed a cookie to the head of lettuce*

Larry: *picks up cookie and prepares to take a bite, when...*

Button(on cookie): *pop* *leaps off cookie*

Larry: Foad, man!! who do these buttons think thay are?? *snarl*



------------------
~MoonPhisto*

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A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
And follows in the trail, the scatter of the light"
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Old 11-09-2001, 10:17 PM   #9
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lol, BTW~ fun fun story!!

*Larry checks clipboard*

LMFAO!!!!!!

------------------
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A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
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Old 11-09-2001, 10:36 PM   #10
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LMAO...You girls are so damn funny and creative...I wish I could have the creativity to contribute...

*runs away, grabs freshly baked cookies and pouts in corner with charred cardboard Adam*
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Old 11-10-2001, 09:13 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by MissVelvetDress:
LMAO...You girls are so damn funny and creative...I wish I could have the creativity to contribute...

*runs away, grabs freshly baked cookies and pouts in corner with charred cardboard Adam*
lol!!!!!! Charred Adam!



------------------
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a little girl With Spanish eyes
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Love me, Give me Soul

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Old 11-10-2001, 11:15 AM   #12
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Uh oh...methinks I *smell* another story line here....

*sniff* ....somethin' burnin'??? I THINK IT'S LOVE!!!


Quote:
Originally posted by WildHonee:
lol!!!!!! Charred Adam!
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Old 11-10-2001, 01:57 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by Discoteque:
Uh oh...methinks I *smell* another story line here....

*sniff* ....somethin' burnin'??? I THINK IT'S LOVE!!!


bring on the love...
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Old 11-10-2001, 07:21 PM   #14
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Jjjjjjuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuullllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!

*is shamed* lol watch Edge start snookering the lettuce or something.....

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97% compatible with Bono

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Old 11-10-2001, 07:31 PM   #15
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Okay wait a minute! No one is to add to this story until I get my act together and add more myself!

I finally write more for the MacPhisto story, and get it all ready to post, and now I've got to keep up with THIS one!

AAAAIIIIEEEEEEEE!

------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
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Old 11-10-2001, 08:27 PM   #16
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Okay here we go...

*Echo re-enters room after having cleaned up Cardboard Adam's ashes.*

Echo: Have the cookies finished? I hope one of you had the sense to...Edge?! What are you doing with that head of lettuce?!

*Animatronic Edge gives Echo a guilty look but continues petting the lettuce.*

Echo: (Holds out hand) Okay, Edge, give me the head.

*Edge starts to kneel down.*

Echo: No, Edge, give me THE head! Of LETTUCE!

*Edge gets back up and hands it to her.*

Echo: Okay then. You can go in the bedroom and get the cat...YOUR cat! The kitt - oh, never mind.

Echo: Hey, you two!

(Everyone in the band turns around.)

Echo: No, I mean THOSE two! (Points to Moaner and Boner on the counter.) For the love of God STOP DOING THAT ON MY COUNTER! I HAVE TO SLICE VEGETABLES ON THAT COUNTER!

*Moaner and Boner slide sheepishly off the counter and mark their territory elsewhere.*

Echo: Sheesh, I'll never be able to cut up a zucchini on that counter again without thinking of that.

Adam: Hey, Echo, do you have any more spoons?

Echo: (Eyebrow goes up) Why?

Adam: I, em...I lost all the ones in that drawer.

Echo: What do you mean you lost them?

Adam: I, uh...I dropped them...in the toilet.

Echo: How did you do that?!?!?

Adam: I'd rather not talk about it.

Echo: Adam, I swear you cannot be left alone for a SECOND! Here. (She hands him a cookie.) Go sit at the dining room table and eat this cookie and DON'T touch ANYTHING. (Looks around knowingly.) I'm certain someone will come pick you up when they feel so inclined...

------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation! http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165


[This message has been edited by Echo (edited 11-10-2001).]

[This message has been edited by Echo (edited 11-10-2001).]
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Old 11-10-2001, 09:37 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally posted by Echo:

Echo: Hey, you two!

(Everyone in the band turns around.)
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's so great!!!!!!! I loveth thee, Echo!


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Love me, Give me Soul

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Old 11-10-2001, 09:49 PM   #18
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LARRY: Aw, feck it all to heck....I should get a new waxing product...Lookit me stubble thar...just look at eet. Why yam I talking like a Scotsman? Ar. Matey. I'm a pirate now...ar....

ECHO: Lawrence, where are you going?

LARRY: I've got to...use the loo....yes...that's it...D'ya need that vat of fondue?

ECHO: This vat of fondue? Well, how'd THAT get there? No, I guess not.

EDGE BOT:lettuce lettuce lettuce lettuce love you lettuce

ECHO: Now then...time to send all the zucchinis down the garbage disposal...

ADAM: *from dining room* CAN I HAVE ONE FOR EACH HAND?

a large THUD is heard. Bono has fallen off of...wherever it was that he and Mona were! And wouldn't you like to know WHERE that was?! I'll never tell....

BONO: *calling from a distant room* WHAT THE BLOODY- ADAM, WHAAAAAT?

EDGE BOT: *animatronic bluuuuuuussssshhhhhhh*

ECHO: *appears in the doorway to the dining room brandishing 2 zucchinis* WHAT?

ADAM: Em...cookies? I-- you gave me one, and I...wanted...another...and....

ECHO: *gives Adam the evil eye*

ADAM: I can hang spoons from me nose....and other places, too!

ECHO: *slaps forehead* I DON'T wanna know...

MISSVELVETDRESS: But I do!!!!!!!

ECHO: Whatever...hey, where's Larry? HELLO? LARRY?

LARRY: *rushes back in* I went to find the loo--

ECHO: Did you find it?

LARRY: Yes, and Mona was there --with Bono-- and they weren't cleaning it!!!

EDGE BOT: OM *bluuuuussssshhhhhh*

------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

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Old 11-10-2001, 10:08 PM   #19
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guys...we could revolutionize modern theater...I'm not kidding.

Let's form a touring troupe and perform in Ireland...make that Dublin...make that Bono's house....oo *perform* *innuendo*

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a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

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Old 11-10-2001, 10:41 PM   #20
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