Echo's Kitchen Disaster

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Echo

War Child
Joined
Oct 3, 2001
Messages
769
Location
The Echosphere
*THE SCENE: Echo's kitchen. She and the lads are going to bake cookies for the PLEBA girls.*

ECHO: Okay, everybody gets to do their bit. Edge, you mix together the butter and the eggs. Adam...where's Adam?

*Adam enters.*

ADAM: Hey Echo, your mom has some nice clothes.

ECHO: Adam, that's my mom's best skirt! You take those clothes off right this instant!

ADAM: Yes, ma'am!

ECHO: No, I mean...put them back in my mom's closet! (He leaves and returns in his OWN skirt) That's better. Now get those cookie sheets greased up.

ADAM: With pleasure.

ECHO: Bono, what you need to do is sift together the flour and baking soda and sugar...where's the sugar?

*Larry enters, holding a cornish game hen.*

LARRY: Who wants my meat?

ECHO: Larry, that's Mona's joke!

LARRY: It is? Wait a minute...(pulls out clipboard and examnes it) Isn't this Tuesday?

ECHO: It's Friday.

LARRY: Oops. Okay, hold on...(exits, then comes back with a bag of sugar) Alright, who wants a little sugar in their bowl?

ADAM: WHat is this cardboard stand-up of me doing here?

ECHO: We..uh...weren't expecting you.

LARRY: Where's the silverware? (Opens the junk drawer) Wow, look at all the buttons! I could use these! (He grabs a handful of oddball buttons and goes into the sewing room to attach them.)

ECHO: Edge, where's your kitten? It was here a minute ago...

EDGE: (shrugs)

ECHO: Well it's gotta be around here...OH NO! (The kitten is on the counter, licking the butter) THE CAT IS LICKING THE BUTTER!!! All my grandmother's worst fears are coming true!!!

ADAM: That's not so bad...Bono was licking it earlier.

*Larry returns with his shirt buttoned up with six buttons: two black, one white, one blue, one pink and heart-shaped, and one two inches in diameter.*

LARRY: Look at that! Good as new!

ECHO: *Sigh* I'll be right back, (picks up the kitten) I'm gonna go put the kitten away until we're done cooking.

*Animatronic Edge comes running up.*

ECHO: Edge, you can play with your kitten later! I'm just gonna put it in the bedroom.

*He's pointing frantically at the kitchen. Echo doesn't understand. He grabs her by the wrist and pulls her into the kitchen, just as the smoke alarm goes off.*

LARRY: (Yelling over the alarm) Bono accidentally set Cardboard Adam on fire!

ADAM: Accidentally, my arse! That was deliberate - and might I add TYPICAL - hostility towards the bass player!

ECHO: Well don't just STAND THERE you idiots! Put him out!

*Bono picks up Cardboard Adam and beats him repeatedly against the refrigerator to put out the flames. When he's done there's burnt cardboard everywhere, and ashes are still floating down. There is perfect silence, broken after fifteen long seconds.*

BONO: Um.....When the cookies are done baking can we put frosting on them?



------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
 
rotflmfao! echo, you are hilarious!

------------------
"You can download an atmosphere and dial up a groove, but there's a certain magic when three musicians and a dyslexic get together and play in a room." -Bono

Love,
Emily

The city's desire to take me for more and more...
 
The same thing happened at my house, up till the cat licking the butter part....

ADAM: That's OK. Bono was licking it earlier

EDGE: WWWWWWHHHHHHHAAAAAAATTTT????? Bono? SAY it ain't SO!

BONO: *is opening cabinets* Got any cranberry sauce?

LARRY: He was talking about the butter, wanker. What did you THINK he meant, Edge?

EDGE: Oh...yes....of course....BUTTER...heheh...*Ahem*

MONA: *enters randomly* *hangs camo hat on Adam's head*

ADAM: Hey! What th--?

MONA: Oh...I thought you were...never mind...
Hey hey! WHAT'S COOKIN, GOOOOOOOD LOOKIN?! *approaches Bono*

BONO: We're baking cookies.

MONA: Need any help?

LARRY: Well-- as soon as he spoke, his newly replaced buttons went flying off
Aw, feck it all to heck!

ADAM: Spoons! Spoons!! *makes a nest of spoons*

BONO: Do we have...chocolate chips?

MONA: Of course we do! We have...everything...*swiped everything off the counter in a massive sweep of her arm*

BONO: Oh...careful now...you knocked over a few--

ANIMATRONIC EDGE: *uses massive robot strength to help Mona lift Bono onto counter*

Wow. Well now I couldn't possibly finish that! *mind wanders to strange and wonderful places* heheh

~PHONA~
 
*lol*

------------------
"I don't know you,
But you don't know the half of it..."
 
Originally posted by Echo:
ADAM: Accidentally, my arse! That was deliberate - and might I add TYPICAL - hostility towards the bass player!




LOL!! Great story, Echo!
biggrin.gif



[This message has been edited by Ana (edited 11-09-2001).]
 
Originally posted by WildHonee:
ADAM: Spoons! Spoons!! *makes a nest of spoons*

~PHONA~


OMG I CANT BELIEVE I WROTE A WHOLE SCRIPT IN THE BLEEDIN' KITCHEN AND I DIDN'T WRITE A SINGLE WORD ABOUT ADAM AND HIS SPOONS! IN THE KITCHEN!

*runs away sobbing in embarrassment*



------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
 
Originally posted by Echo:

OMG I CANT BELIEVE I WROTE A WHOLE SCRIPT IN THE BLEEDIN' KITCHEN AND I DIDN'T WRITE A SINGLE WORD ABOUT ADAM AND HIS SPOONS! IN THE KITCHEN!

*runs away sobbing in embarrassment*
lol!


------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
Mona & Bono: *occupied on counter*

Larry: Shite! Oh, bloody HELL!! Get a ROOM!

Buttons: *pop* *pop*

Edge-bot: *bluuuuuuush* *quickly
averts eyes*

Julie: *enters* HOLY GUACAMOLE! *tosses a sheet, which magically appeared in her hands, over them* did he spill more cranberry sauce on him?

Edge-bot: *looks around with a concerned look*

Julie: oh, you miss your kitten?
frown.gif
well, i don't think it's allowed in the kitchen right now, but..... *opens refridgerator, pulls out a head of lettuce* here. how's this?

Edge-bot:*face brightens and a huge smile spreads across face* *grabs head of lettuce and immediately begins to cuddle with it and pet it*

*ding*

Adam: cookies are done!

Bono & Mona: *in unison, from beneath the sheet* COOKIES??

Larry: time to decorate! i'm putting me buttons on mine. ...might as well put 'em to SOME use. *decorate*

Adam: can i eat mine with a spoon?

Edge-bot: *attempts to feed a cookie to the head of lettuce*

Larry: *picks up cookie and prepares to take a bite, when...*

Button(on cookie): *pop* *leaps off cookie*

Larry: Foad, man!! who do these buttons think thay are?? *snarl*



------------------
~MoonPhisto*

"A man dreams one day to fly
A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
And follows in the trail, the scatter of the light"
 
lol, BTW~ fun fun story!!

*Larry checks clipboard*

LMFAO!!!!!!

------------------
~MoonPhisto*

"A man dreams one day to fly
A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
And follows in the trail, the scatter of the light"
 
LMAO...You girls are so damn funny and creative...I wish I could have the creativity to contribute...

*runs away, grabs freshly baked cookies and pouts in corner with charred cardboard Adam*
 
Originally posted by MissVelvetDress:
LMAO...You girls are so damn funny and creative...I wish I could have the creativity to contribute...

*runs away, grabs freshly baked cookies and pouts in corner with charred cardboard Adam*
lol!!!!!! Charred Adam!



------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
Jjjjjjuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuullllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!

*is shamed*
smile.gif
lol watch Edge start snookering the lettuce or something.....
smile.gif


------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
Okay wait a minute! No one is to add to this story until I get my act together and add more myself!

I finally write more for the MacPhisto story, and get it all ready to post, and now I've got to keep up with THIS one!

AAAAIIIIEEEEEEEE!

------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
 
Okay here we go...

*Echo re-enters room after having cleaned up Cardboard Adam's ashes.*

Echo: Have the cookies finished? I hope one of you had the sense to...Edge?! What are you doing with that head of lettuce?!

*Animatronic Edge gives Echo a guilty look but continues petting the lettuce.*

Echo: (Holds out hand) Okay, Edge, give me the head.

*Edge starts to kneel down.*

Echo: No, Edge, give me THE head! Of LETTUCE!

*Edge gets back up and hands it to her.*

Echo: Okay then. You can go in the bedroom and get the cat...YOUR cat! The kitt - oh, never mind.

Echo: Hey, you two!

(Everyone in the band turns around.)

Echo: No, I mean THOSE two! (Points to Moaner and Boner on the counter.) For the love of God STOP DOING THAT ON MY COUNTER! I HAVE TO SLICE VEGETABLES ON THAT COUNTER!

*Moaner and Boner slide sheepishly off the counter and mark their territory elsewhere.*

Echo: Sheesh, I'll never be able to cut up a zucchini on that counter again without thinking of that.

Adam: Hey, Echo, do you have any more spoons?

Echo: (Eyebrow goes up) Why?

Adam: I, em...I lost all the ones in that drawer.

Echo: What do you mean you lost them?

Adam: I, uh...I dropped them...in the toilet.

Echo: How did you do that?!?!?

Adam: I'd rather not talk about it.

Echo: Adam, I swear you cannot be left alone for a SECOND! Here. (She hands him a cookie.) Go sit at the dining room table and eat this cookie and DON'T touch ANYTHING. (Looks around knowingly.) I'm certain someone will come pick you up when they feel so inclined...

------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation! http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165


[This message has been edited by Echo (edited 11-10-2001).]

[This message has been edited by Echo (edited 11-10-2001).]
 
Originally posted by Echo:

Echo: Hey, you two!

(Everyone in the band turns around.)
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
biggrin.gif
biggrin.gif
That's so great!!!!!!! I loveth thee, Echo!


------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
LARRY: Aw, feck it all to heck....I should get a new waxing product...Lookit me stubble thar...just look at eet. Why yam I talking like a Scotsman? Ar. Matey. I'm a pirate now...ar....

ECHO: Lawrence, where are you going?

LARRY: I've got to...use the loo....yes...that's it...D'ya need that vat of fondue?

ECHO: This vat of fondue? Well, how'd THAT get there? No, I guess not.

EDGE BOT:lettuce lettuce lettuce lettuce love you lettuce

ECHO: Now then...time to send all the zucchinis down the garbage disposal...

ADAM: *from dining room* CAN I HAVE ONE FOR EACH HAND?

a large THUD is heard. Bono has fallen off of...wherever it was that he and Mona were! And wouldn't you like to know WHERE that was?! I'll never tell....

BONO: *calling from a distant room* WHAT THE BLOODY- ADAM, WHAAAAAT?

EDGE BOT: *animatronic bluuuuuuussssshhhhhhh*

ECHO: *appears in the doorway to the dining room brandishing 2 zucchinis* WHAT?

ADAM: Em...cookies? I-- you gave me one, and I...wanted...another...and....

ECHO: *gives Adam the evil eye*

ADAM: I can hang spoons from me nose....and other places, too!

ECHO: *slaps forehead* I DON'T wanna know...

MISSVELVETDRESS: But I do!!!!!!!

ECHO: Whatever...hey, where's Larry? HELLO? LARRY?

LARRY: *rushes back in* I went to find the loo--

ECHO: Did you find it?

LARRY: Yes, and Mona was there --with Bono-- and they weren't cleaning it!!!

EDGE BOT: OM *bluuuuussssshhhhhh*

------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
guys...we could revolutionize modern theater...I'm not kidding.

Let's form a touring troupe and perform in Ireland...make that Dublin...make that Bono's house....oo *perform* *innuendo*

------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
Originally posted by WildHonee:
guys...we could revolutionize modern theater...I'm not kidding.

Let's form a touring troupe and perform in Ireland...make that Dublin...make that Bono's house....oo *perform* *innuendo*


WATCH WITH AMAZEMENT!

In the length of JUST ONE POST Mona goes from possibly being the next Tennessee Williams to just being the next Bob Guccione!




------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
 
*OUCH.* Ever snort Cajun dip up your nose from laughing so hard? Well it's isn't pretty, and it hurts like hell!!
tongue.gif


LMFAO!!


Echo: (Holds out hand) Okay, Edge, give me the head.

*Edge starts to kneel down*

Echo: No, Edge, give me THE head! Of LETTUCE!

---
LARRY: Aw, feck it all to heck....I should get a new waxing product...Lookit me stubble thar...just look at eet. Why yam I talking like a Scotsman? Ar. Matey. I'm a pirate now...ar....

yargh...
 
Well, Mona, I have all night to write this stuff if you do....

Echo: (Hands Adam another cookie) What could Larry possibly want with a vat of vondue that I didn't even know I had?

*Animatronic Edge sets down the kitten and walks in a circle around the kitchen.*

Edge: lettuce lettuce lettuce love you lettuce...

Echo: Edge, are you alright?

Edge: (not responding) lettuce lettuce lettuce love you lettuce...

Echo: Are you still thinking about the lettuce?

Edge: lettuce lettuce lettuce love you lettuce...

Adam: (comes back into the kitchen) What's with Animatronic Edge?

Echo: He's stuck in a loop. Hold on. (She pulls out her remote, hits a few buttons.) He's programmed to love the kitten and care for it, but apparently he malfunctioned when he picked up the lettuce. I've just got to reprogam him to love the kitten again.

*Echo presses a few more buttons and turns a dial. Animatronic Edge suddenly stops, looks up, grabs Adam, and gives him a big slurpin' tongue kiss.*

Echo: Oh shite, that's the wrong sequence! (Hits more buttons.) See Edge, this is why i wouldn't buy you a Furby!

Adam: MMMMMPHH!!

Echo: Just hold tight, Adam, I'll have him fixed in a second. Try to breathe through your nose.

Adam: Mmmmph!

Edge: Adam Adam Adam love you Adam...

Adam: Mmmph....Mmmm...

Echo: (Pushes final button) There!

*Edge releases Adam.*

Edge: kitten kitten kitten kitten...

Echo: You okay?

Adam: Great! I mean, fine. I mean, okay I guess....Um, I'm gonna go, uh, look for Larry...(Leaves. Opens bathroom door.) AAAIEEEEE!!

Moaner and Boner: (Simultaneously) Occupied!!!
(Not the last thing to happen simultaneously.)

Echo: (Pulls industrial-size bottle of disinfectant out from under sink) I'll be needing THAT later....


------------------
*Echo* The Proud Owner of Animatronic Edge!

"Never argue with someone who buys ink by the gallon." -Tommy Lasorda

"Are you implying that I'm an internet slut?" -Bono


Bono-Man! An Epic Superhero Adventure http://www.geocities.com/bonogoestovegas

The Official PLEBA Glossary: Replacing Crippling Confusion With Mere Disorientation!
http://www.vodkatea.com/g/glossary.asp?gid=165
 
Originally posted by Echo:
WATCH WITH AMAZEMENT!

In the length of JUST ONE POST Mona goes from possibly being the next Tennessee Williams to just being the next Bob Guccione!
*is laughing in hopes that no one will notice she doesn't know who Bob Gucciones is....*
smile.gif




------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
LARRY: Oh the fondue...of course...Ay didn't explain meself....I was gonna use it as wax to wax meself...not that I wax meself....*ahem*

ECHO: I know I have lemon-scented Mr. Clean around here somewhere..*rummage rummage under sink*

MONA: Are you DONE yet?

BONO: *falls down* Pardon?

MONA: I was talking to Echo!

BONO: Oh...good.

------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
OMG!!!!!!!! lol!!!

"are you DONE yet??"

lol!!!

------------------
~MoonPhisto*

"A man dreams one day to fly
A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
And follows in the trail, the scatter of the light"
 
Originally posted by FallDownJulie:
OMG!!!!!!!! lol!!!

"are you DONE yet??"

lol!!!
That was Phona, not me...posting...heheh



------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
Larry: *runs into room, bumping into Adam* Bloody hell! Those two STILL in the loo?? *looks at Adam* And what are you doing? Here- look at this for a while. *hands him a spoon*

MissVelevetDress: *snookers cardboard Adam in the corner*

Adam: Saaaaaaaaaay... who's THAT lovely lady over there? *saunters over*

Echo: *sigh* *watches Adam wander off, picks up a cookie, and munches whilst she flips through Animatronic Edge's owner's manual* Oh! i nearly forgot~ i got you something, Larry. Call it a belated birthday present.

Larry: eh? *unwraps package*

PLEBA girls: *snicker, swoon, and/or faint*

Echo: it's a shirt with a zipper! that way you won't have to worry about those pesky buttons anymore!
smile.gif


Larry Mullen's Pop Angel: *banging on kitchen window from outside* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

*ding dong*

Julie: i'll get it. *goes to front door*

*door opens*

[voices heard from other room:]

Julie: Oh! You're finally here! For a while there i thought you had decided not to come! *hug*

?: *bluuuush* Em, yes. Well, you see, i wanted me Goldfish crackers *munch* and the guys didn't want to stop at the market, so we decided to take separate cars. also, Bono drives at 137 miles per hour. and doesn't understand stop lights. and... heeeey, can i see that blender a minute?

*the two walk into the kitchen*

Echo: well, look who showed up!
smile.gif


Edge: Yea, *blush* I- ...who, eh... what, em... *at a loss of words, finally just points*

Animatronic Edge: *looks up at the figure pointing at him and is so surprised he holds his kitten closer and steps back, ducking behind Echo's skirt*


------------------
~MoonPhisto*

"A man dreams one day to fly
A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
And follows in the trail, the scatter of the light"

[This message has been edited by FallDownJulie (edited 11-11-2001).]
 
OK
lemmee get this straight...

MissVelvetDress is having a 2some with RealAdam and FakeAdam

RealEdge and EdgeBot are gonna have a mud rasslin' show down

Larry is hotter than ever?

Is this all POSSIBLE????!!!!!! WHAT has the world come to?

O wait....Bono and I are snookering somewhere....
carry on!

------------------
~*Mona*~
a little girl With Spanish eyes
97% compatible with Bono

Love me, Give me Soul

Magic Magic Magic Joe Houdini
 
lol~ i WAS going to have larry suggest that you and bono were in the loo such a long time because maybe you and Phona were tag-teaming him, but out of the idea that these "activites" were going on and there were 3 people invoved, i was afraid the idea might wander to overly-raunchy areas.
wink.gif


lol! mud wrasslin' edge-edge show down!
smile.gif


------------------
~MoonPhisto*

"A man dreams one day to fly
A man takes a rocket ship to the skies
He lives on a star that's dying in the night
And follows in the trail, the scatter of the light"
 
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