u2bonogirl
Rock n' Roll Doggie ALL ACCESS
heres the next part, hope you like it! just so you know this is kinda like between achtung baby and pop somewhere in there. and its a parallel universe type thing, you know bonos single, blah blah
He took me to a really nice restaurant that I was extremely not dressed for but he insisted we go anyway. Looks from people all over the restaurant poured in. I don?t know if it was because Bono was there, of if it was because he was with a beat up looking girl. Eventually I just ignored it as I would later learn to do very well. We sat across from each other and my foot ?accidentally? kept touching his which he seemed to like judging the look he gave me every time I did it. He was breaking out of the shyness he had going on earlier and was acting like the Bono I thought he would be. Flirty, outgoing, sexy, sexy, sexy...yeah you get the picture.
He looked at me kind of seriously after he had finished what he was eating.
? I want to tell you something and I don?t want you to take it the wrong way okay??
?Sure B, go ahead? I hoped he wasn?t going to tell me he was sorry he had flirted with me and it was all a misunderstanding.
?Okay, well when I first saw you last night I was in a really bad mood. I have been having an awful week and feeling depressed on top of it. You know, I read every one of your letters. I?m sorry I didn?t write anything in the one the guys sent to you. I will tell you why I didn?t. First of all I was almost dating this one woman at the time. I knew she was wrong for me and the guys were trying to tell me but I wouldnt listen to them. She was making me feel horrible about myself all the time, but every time I read one of your letters I felt like I was getting to know you. It made me feel good to find out things about you and discover your thoughts and pains. You were making me feel good and she was making me feel bad. Suddenly I was freaked out. I couldn?t be thinking about somebody I don?t really know more than my sort of girlfriend. She forbade me to write to you when she found the letters of yours. I didnt really lose them. I kept them so I could have you all to myself when I wanted to. The picture of you is hidden in one of my drawers at home.......?
He trailed off as I sat there sort of awestruck and pleased at the same time. Knowing not to interrupt him I just stayed quiet.
?I don?t want to sound like I?m mad but it was like I was feeling what my fans feel for me. Feeling you know somebody by what you read about them, and their words on paper. Suddenly it was all so real to me and I could understand what others feel. Meanwhile the more I got to know who you are the more I liked you, and then began to feel I loved you. This really confused me because I knew that I could never be with you. I would probably never meet you, and I had blown my chance to say something to you anyway. So I was in a bad mood when I saw you on the dance floor. I didnt know it was you at first but I was oddly drawn to look at the person dancing to my song. Normally I don?t like hearing my music all the time in the clubs but this time I felt as if I was the guy in the song, and the character I do in the concerts reaching out to touch but not being able to. Your face illuminated under the light and I saw who you were for the first time. That is when I think you saw me too. I didn?t think you realized who I was and thought about going and talking to you when you were done making every man in the club want you! You left too soon. I thought you didn?t want to talk to me, or you didn?t care who I was....I dunno. It just bummed me out when you left because I wanted to talk to you. I couldn?t tell the guys last night what I was feeling, because they would just think I was being lustful towards women again. It gave me hope when I saw you looking at me this morning like you were interested in talking to me, I was just being cautious at first, trying not to freak you out.?
?I was doing the same to you! I didn?t want to seem like some crazy fan trying to get in your pants so I can tell my friends about it. I really want to get to know all of you. All I?ve ever had to go on is books and movies to know you by and I know thats not enough.?
We both paused and looked at each other. Nothing needed to be said anymore. We understood. I hoped I hadn?t ruined my chances at being his friend by wanting him so bad earlier. Hopefully my desire wouldnt get in the way of everything. Suddenly I felt as if I was going to cry. All the feelings of being hurt by men in my life were flooding back and I couldnt help but be scared of Bono. Would he hurt me just like everybody else? I can handle being hit, but being emotionally abused was just something I couldn?t take anymore. Especially from somebody I cared so much about. What could a famous rock star want from me anyway? I had nothing to offer really.
?Are you okay Tara? You look like something is worrying you.?
I didnt realize it was showing that much so I glanced up at him quickly and sniffled the almost-tears away.
?No Bono, everything is fine. I?m full now if you would like to go look for some shoes with me.?
He looked like he had a secret to tell me and he couldn?t hold it any longer.
?Ummm? he said ?I have a confession to make. I havent really lost your shoes, I just used that as an excuse to get you out and talk my way onto your good side.? he looked genuinely sorry for lying to me so I forgave him. Besides, it was nice getting to talk to him finally after so many years of just getting to look at him on a screen or piece of paper.
?Don?t worry, I?m not mad at you. I understand. Now I?m sad that I don?t get to go shopping with you...? I lied through my teeth to see his reaction. His face said it all. Eyes sunk, mouth drooped, and then it all rose again when he realized that I really wanted to spend time with him.
?B - I?m kidding, relax. You haven?t ruined my life completely. You probably need to get back to the guys anyway don?t you??
?Actually we were just getting done. I don?t have to do any work as far as recording goes. We just got one done called if you wear that velvet dress...? he looked into space.... ?um, maybe I can sing it to you sometime. But we need Adam to come back so we can start doing some more. Honestly, that guy thinks he can do whatever he wants.?
?Sounds kinda like you? I snickered.
?Thanks, you can find your own ride home.?
?Youre forgetting Bono, I don?t have a home. I have just run away from it to Dublin.?
He looked a little apopogetic
?I?m sorry I didn?t mean to make it sound like that, you can stay with us if you like.?
?No, I?m alright, I have a room at some place a few miles from here. Its not the best but its better than the grass outside at night.?
?We can put you up at the Clarence until you have a living situation figured out, or until you decide to go back to america.?
He sounded like he meant that as a question on whether or not I?m staying in Ireland.
?I really don?t know what I will do. I was just flying by the seat of my pants when I came here. Really there was no plan. Maybe the Clarence would be nice. I have to do something in return for getting a free room though. Anything.?
?Well......you could come with me and the guys to an award show we have to go to in a couple days! I don?t have anybody to go by my side as of now because Amanda wont go with me now. Thats the one I was telling you about. I know that all the other guys have dates and now I don?t want to be all alone.? He really tried to look pitiful. I guess it sort of worked.
?I?ll think about it. You really will have to take me shopping them because I haven?t anything to wear to something like that. I hope my bruises heal before then.? I really didn?t want to talk about that and I was sorry I brought it up.
He took me to a really nice restaurant that I was extremely not dressed for but he insisted we go anyway. Looks from people all over the restaurant poured in. I don?t know if it was because Bono was there, of if it was because he was with a beat up looking girl. Eventually I just ignored it as I would later learn to do very well. We sat across from each other and my foot ?accidentally? kept touching his which he seemed to like judging the look he gave me every time I did it. He was breaking out of the shyness he had going on earlier and was acting like the Bono I thought he would be. Flirty, outgoing, sexy, sexy, sexy...yeah you get the picture.
He looked at me kind of seriously after he had finished what he was eating.
? I want to tell you something and I don?t want you to take it the wrong way okay??
?Sure B, go ahead? I hoped he wasn?t going to tell me he was sorry he had flirted with me and it was all a misunderstanding.
?Okay, well when I first saw you last night I was in a really bad mood. I have been having an awful week and feeling depressed on top of it. You know, I read every one of your letters. I?m sorry I didn?t write anything in the one the guys sent to you. I will tell you why I didn?t. First of all I was almost dating this one woman at the time. I knew she was wrong for me and the guys were trying to tell me but I wouldnt listen to them. She was making me feel horrible about myself all the time, but every time I read one of your letters I felt like I was getting to know you. It made me feel good to find out things about you and discover your thoughts and pains. You were making me feel good and she was making me feel bad. Suddenly I was freaked out. I couldn?t be thinking about somebody I don?t really know more than my sort of girlfriend. She forbade me to write to you when she found the letters of yours. I didnt really lose them. I kept them so I could have you all to myself when I wanted to. The picture of you is hidden in one of my drawers at home.......?
He trailed off as I sat there sort of awestruck and pleased at the same time. Knowing not to interrupt him I just stayed quiet.
?I don?t want to sound like I?m mad but it was like I was feeling what my fans feel for me. Feeling you know somebody by what you read about them, and their words on paper. Suddenly it was all so real to me and I could understand what others feel. Meanwhile the more I got to know who you are the more I liked you, and then began to feel I loved you. This really confused me because I knew that I could never be with you. I would probably never meet you, and I had blown my chance to say something to you anyway. So I was in a bad mood when I saw you on the dance floor. I didnt know it was you at first but I was oddly drawn to look at the person dancing to my song. Normally I don?t like hearing my music all the time in the clubs but this time I felt as if I was the guy in the song, and the character I do in the concerts reaching out to touch but not being able to. Your face illuminated under the light and I saw who you were for the first time. That is when I think you saw me too. I didn?t think you realized who I was and thought about going and talking to you when you were done making every man in the club want you! You left too soon. I thought you didn?t want to talk to me, or you didn?t care who I was....I dunno. It just bummed me out when you left because I wanted to talk to you. I couldn?t tell the guys last night what I was feeling, because they would just think I was being lustful towards women again. It gave me hope when I saw you looking at me this morning like you were interested in talking to me, I was just being cautious at first, trying not to freak you out.?
?I was doing the same to you! I didn?t want to seem like some crazy fan trying to get in your pants so I can tell my friends about it. I really want to get to know all of you. All I?ve ever had to go on is books and movies to know you by and I know thats not enough.?
We both paused and looked at each other. Nothing needed to be said anymore. We understood. I hoped I hadn?t ruined my chances at being his friend by wanting him so bad earlier. Hopefully my desire wouldnt get in the way of everything. Suddenly I felt as if I was going to cry. All the feelings of being hurt by men in my life were flooding back and I couldnt help but be scared of Bono. Would he hurt me just like everybody else? I can handle being hit, but being emotionally abused was just something I couldn?t take anymore. Especially from somebody I cared so much about. What could a famous rock star want from me anyway? I had nothing to offer really.
?Are you okay Tara? You look like something is worrying you.?
I didnt realize it was showing that much so I glanced up at him quickly and sniffled the almost-tears away.
?No Bono, everything is fine. I?m full now if you would like to go look for some shoes with me.?
He looked like he had a secret to tell me and he couldn?t hold it any longer.
?Ummm? he said ?I have a confession to make. I havent really lost your shoes, I just used that as an excuse to get you out and talk my way onto your good side.? he looked genuinely sorry for lying to me so I forgave him. Besides, it was nice getting to talk to him finally after so many years of just getting to look at him on a screen or piece of paper.
?Don?t worry, I?m not mad at you. I understand. Now I?m sad that I don?t get to go shopping with you...? I lied through my teeth to see his reaction. His face said it all. Eyes sunk, mouth drooped, and then it all rose again when he realized that I really wanted to spend time with him.
?B - I?m kidding, relax. You haven?t ruined my life completely. You probably need to get back to the guys anyway don?t you??
?Actually we were just getting done. I don?t have to do any work as far as recording goes. We just got one done called if you wear that velvet dress...? he looked into space.... ?um, maybe I can sing it to you sometime. But we need Adam to come back so we can start doing some more. Honestly, that guy thinks he can do whatever he wants.?
?Sounds kinda like you? I snickered.
?Thanks, you can find your own ride home.?
?Youre forgetting Bono, I don?t have a home. I have just run away from it to Dublin.?
He looked a little apopogetic
?I?m sorry I didn?t mean to make it sound like that, you can stay with us if you like.?
?No, I?m alright, I have a room at some place a few miles from here. Its not the best but its better than the grass outside at night.?
?We can put you up at the Clarence until you have a living situation figured out, or until you decide to go back to america.?
He sounded like he meant that as a question on whether or not I?m staying in Ireland.
?I really don?t know what I will do. I was just flying by the seat of my pants when I came here. Really there was no plan. Maybe the Clarence would be nice. I have to do something in return for getting a free room though. Anything.?
?Well......you could come with me and the guys to an award show we have to go to in a couple days! I don?t have anybody to go by my side as of now because Amanda wont go with me now. Thats the one I was telling you about. I know that all the other guys have dates and now I don?t want to be all alone.? He really tried to look pitiful. I guess it sort of worked.
?I?ll think about it. You really will have to take me shopping them because I haven?t anything to wear to something like that. I hope my bruises heal before then.? I really didn?t want to talk about that and I was sorry I brought it up.
I like the spacing better, too.
