The next thing he knew, Bono found himself in heaven. As he approached the pearly gates his thin, grey hair fluttered in the breeze. 'No secrets here' he mused to himself. At the entrance he was met not by Saint Peter but by Saint Bob Geldof. "Hi Mate" said Saint Bob, his thin, grey hair fluttering in the breeze. "Hi Bob" replied Bono. "Come with me" beckoned Saint Bob, holding out his Irish hand. Bono met it with his own and together they skipped hand-in-hand through the gates of paradise...