LoveandLogic
Refugee
A/N: I know, I know, long time no write from LoveandLogic. A few select of you have been asking me if I've stopped writing. No. I never stop writing. I'm just taking my time with this story (I got irritated with not remembering my story plots, dates, history and my grammar is usually terrible, etc) and I have a wonderful beta now, the wonderful WithoutSpeaking who has been not only my picture/brainstorming buddy, but my side kick in A Tender Trap.
Slowly Love and Drifting will be put to the side for awhile. This one here is my baby.
Here are the links to the latest chapters in case you had forgotten what is happening. Thank you for being patient with me! It means a ton!
Also, I will be adding a little description and a rating. Enjoy!
Latest Chapters:
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-one-206286.html
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-two-206371.html
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-three-206455.html
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-four-207266.html
Summary: Bono and Raven had the ideal marriage. But after the Joshua Tree tour, things start to go downhill. With Edge's own marriage hanging on a string and the tension within everyone involved, the band flees to Berlin to find artistic inspiration. Edge and Raven team together to escape the loneliness in their lives. How far will they go to feel complete again?
Rating (By Chapter): PG-13 for language
Author: LoveandLogic/AllAtOnce10 on Burning Down Love
Disclaimer:Don't know, don't own. Not getting money for this. Although it'd be a lot cooler if I was!
* * * * * *
That night she laid in bed next to her husband, his silhouette lined by the moonlight creeping in through the windows, the curves of his body illuminated as he rested on his side facing her. She wanted so badly to trace his lips, to feel the stubble on his chin beneath her fingertips. He looked so elegant like that, she thought, with his eyes closed and mouth slightly open - just enough for his soft breaths to escape. Strands of hair settled downward around his face like a chestnut brown spool of thread.
She adored his hair like this: long, soft and natural. She enjoyed the way it shone while brushing it after a shower, grouping it into a bow at the nape of his neck. She never wanted him to cut it. She had always told him that he looked best with long hair. And that’s exactly why he kept it long. Just for her. The little things. That’s what was important, isn’t it? Have they been so caught up in their separate lives that they had forgotten all about what they sacrificed for one another? She missed the old him-the Bono who used to laugh and joke. And she missed her old self as much as he did. She wasn’t the same artistic girl he fell for, the woman who would sit up with him for hours talking of life, religion and love. She was so serious now; too serious at times.
She reached out carefully and rearranged a strand of hair from his face, tucking it, instead, behind his ear. She felt his skin, grazing his cheek with the tips of her fingers, praying silently that she would be able to feel the same emotions that had weakened her all those years ago.
But she didn’t.
It’s not as though she felt nothing at all. She still loved him with all her heart. Things just weren’t the same for them anymore. They had grown apart as a lot couples often do, though the physical attraction was still there. She found him the most exquisite being she had ever set her eyes upon. Was that all that was there in the first place, she wondered? Just physical attraction? No. If that were the case she would still be deeply in love with him. They would still have that same intensity between them; the fire would still be aflame, forever in heat.
Things weren’t all right. So badly she wanted to tell him that she was angry at him. Angry for changing and angry for not lying only to herself but to him as well. Why didn’t she wake him and tell him this? She wanted to wake him, to talk to him and to make sure that he was really there-alive and breathing. Still hers.
But, she didn’t.
Instead, she left her husband to slumber and tiptoed downstairs to check on the man who was going through bigger problems than she was. The small light in the art room leaked through the hall and Raven used it as a guide. Outside, the wind howled and made the floors creak. Raven wrapped the small blanket tighter around her shoulders and, approaching the door, pushed it open slightly.
She’d expected Edge to still be passed out. After all, he had a rough night and surely he was well past exhausted. Raven, however, was surprised to see him wide awake, his knees at his chest and arms wrapped around his legs. She stood in the frame for a minute or so, watching him as he stared into a flame of a lit candle. Whether he saw it or not, Raven didn’t know. The flame was so minuscule compared to large monster that was now eating away at him. Her heart broke at the sight of her friend and she had not one clue on how to coax him out of his heartache.
Edge looked up at Raven and she gave him a pitiful excuse for a smile. He tried to smile as well, failing just as horribly as her. She walked over to him and sat down, neither of them saying a word. Together they stared into the flame, almost as though it possessed all the answers to their questions; beheld the truth for the lies and arms for comfort. It was silly, really, to gaze into something so fragile that could be broken by something as small as a gust of air.
Unable to tie the silence between them any longer, Raven looked to Edge and whispered, “are you ok?”
Edge shook his head. “I’m miserable, Raven.” He sighed. “I didn’t destroy anything too valuable, right?”
Raven forced Edge’s hands apart so she could lace her fingers through his. The gesture caused Edge to look at her, the fire dancing inside her almond eyes. She brought the back of his hand to her lips and placed a gentle kiss there.
“Don’t you worry about a thing, love,” she assured. “There were some photos that got ruined but I have the negatives. Some poems Bono wrote got ruined but they’re all songs now and paintings will come and go, wither with age. Nothing to be concerned about, ok?”
When he didn’t reply, Raven eyed him again. “Yes?”
“Yes,” he agreed. His head felt heavy and his temple rested on Ravens. His body was warm next to hers, their thighs pressed together and feet tangled. Raven felt somewhat guilty—being this comfortable and physical with another man aside from Bono. If a stranger were to peek in through the window, one would think that Raven and Edge were not just friends but lovers. There was something about the way they clung to one another; the way the silence between them was not deafening but serene.
“You’re welcome here, ya know,” she whispered, running the pad of her thumb across his bruised knuckles. She winced at the scabs. “You can stay here as long as you need to.”
She felt his head move against hers. “Aye. I know, Rave. But I don’t think it’s right to invade on you and Bono. It’s bad enough that I already…”
Edge’s words hung in the air like a bad scent of gasoline, the flame they both were so preoccupied just waiting to ignite. Raven’s body froze and shook at the same time. He didn’t have to finish. She already knew what he was going to say.
It’s bad enough that I already kissed you…
Raven cleared her throat, reached for her cigarette pack with a free hand and popped one of the sticks between her lips. She used the candle to light it before passing the pack to Edge, who took it from her with his empty hand as well. She didn’t want to let go of his fingers. She was afraid that if she did that it would only make Edge feel even worse about earlier. Also, his hand felt good in hers: his palm soft and delicate, but the pads of his fingers calloused and a tad rough from years of pushing into raw metal strings. When Edge’s eyes fell over her fingers he could see traces of dried up paint and silver pencil residue. It made the corners of his lips upturn. They were so alike in so many ways, yet neither spent the time to realize it.
“You should really get some sleep, love,” she told Edge, crushing her cigarette in the overstuffed ashtray. “It’s been a long day.”
Edge hummed in agreement. “Trust me, I want to sleep. Being awake just hurts too damn much…”
Raven stiffened and, for a moment, while tracing his face, debated whether or not to…
No. Raven Dalton, why are you even thinking of such things?!
“Sit up,” she instructed randomly. Edge did so without question and was bewildered by her actions as she grabbed something from the art table before settling behind him. She tucked one leg beneath her and the other hung over the ledge of the settee. Slowly, she removed Edge’s scarf from his head and removed the tight ponytail from the length of his hair.
Raven passed Edge the scarf and he balled the cloth inside his fist tightly. A steady warmth swam through his veins as he felt skilled fingers push into his taut shoulder muscles. Raven rested her chin on his shoulder, running her cheek across the little hairs on his face. He smelled faintly of whiskey but spiced with a scent that was truly his own.
“You poor thing,” cooed Raven in Edge’s ear, still resting in the ditch of his neck and shoulder, her lips only a breath away from his skin. “You’re so tense.”
“It’s been a rough day,” Edge stated the obvious for the umpteenth time that night. He moaned deeply at the feel of the knots in his back coming undone. “That feels nice…” he sighed. “How do you always know the right things to do?”
Raven chuckled. “I don’t. But we’ve all been through heartache. I guess I’m just trying to think of what my friends did for me when I was in pain. Am I helping? Am I taking away the pain, love?”
Sadly, the guitarist reached up and wrapped his long, elegant fingers around Raven’s wrist. His touch was inviting…warm and tender. Their eyes locked for what felt like centuries though it was merely moments. She studied the green background of his irises, the flame of the dim candle creating gold sparkles around the rims and pupil. His lips were slightly parted and she thought about what it would be like to have those lips on hers again...
She went back to earlier that night. Inside her imagination she could see herself pinned to the wall by Edge’s forceful strength, his fingers clamped around her wrists, so very unlike the grip he had on her now. Now it was as if he was holding onto her for dear life; that if he let go, he would surely drown in his own ocean of sorrow.
What would happen if he kissed her again? Would she kiss him back? Would she enjoy it? Give into it? Savor it?
Most importantly…would it cure him of all his suffering?
“Yes, Raven,” Edge answered weakly. “You’re helping to take away some of the pain. But…I think this is something that can’t be cured overnight.”
Nodding, Raven moved her hands to massage his scalp with the tips of her fingers. Edge melted, closing his eyes. Raven gripped the mane of his hair and began to brush out the strands with a comb, starting from the ends and making her way up.
“Since when did your hair get so long, Edge?” She chuckled, loving the way the tangles unraveled so easily at her touch.
Edge smiled for the first time that night. “Since Bono convinced me that it’s the cool thing to do.”
“And you actually believed him?”
He snorted. “Yeah, I guess that doesn’t sound like me at all, does it?”
Giggling now, Raven rolled her eyes and sighed. “Bono has a way of convincing people to do what they would not normally do. Ah, well, at least you take good care of it. I had expected a mess of knots but it’s really soft. I’m kind of jealous.”
“At least you’re not thinning. Fuck,” his voice went low, “now that Aislinn’s gone, who’s going to want a man in his thirties going bald?”
“Edge!” Raven cooed, now braiding the chocolate tresses. “Don’t talk like that. You’re a fantastic catch. Any woman would be lucky to have you.”
“Find me a woman like you and I might just believe it ,” he answered honestly, leaning his head back onto Raven’s chest. He grinned up at her and she shook her head.
“You’re just as impossible as Bono sometimes, you know that?”
“I wasn’t trying to be funny. I was serious.”
Raven’s face softened at the guitarist and she placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, her lips lingering a little longer than necessary. Edge relaxed into her, his feet outstretching along the couch, his hands blindly finding Raven’s so that he could grip them.
Raven rested her cheek on Edge’s head, bringing him close to her.
“I don’t want you to hurt, Edge,” she whispered into his hair. “I hate seeing you like this. I wish I could take it all away for you.”
A tear fell down his face. He kissed the back of her hands, resting his mouth on her knuckles. “Do you really want to help?”
“Of course.”
“Then just…hold me. Please.”
“Ok, Edge.”
She unraveled her legs, stretching them over the length of the settee. Edge rotated onto his side and laid his head upon Raven’s stomach, the rise and fall of her breathing lulling him to relaxation. She hadn’t put his scarf back on and her left hand was busy twirling the braid she’d just created while her right was snug below his chin.
Their legs created a confusing knot and he was warm against her; the stubble on his chin sharp against her knuckles. The room was unbelievably silent aside from the screeching wind outside the window. Gazing down at the guitarist in her arms, her heart and head went to war. After all, she should be upstairs with her husband, holding him close. Not his best mate. Not Edge.
This wasn’t wrong, she reminded herself. No boundaries were being crossed. There wasn’t any form of adultery occurring, nor were they being unfaithful. No. It wasn’t like that at all. Life was plundering down for both Raven and Edge. Who’s to say that couldn’t find comfort inside the arms of a close friend?
Some people had God.
They had each other.
“Baby, don’t worry,” Raven sang soothingly, “about a thing. Because every little thing…is gonna be alright…”
Edge smiled through the tears. “Rise up this mornin', smiled with the risin' sun, three little birds pitch by my doorstep…”
“Singin' sweet songs of melodies pure and true, sayin', ‘this is my message to you…’”
“No, I think he should stay here. With us.”
“Raven, love, I understand why you feel like he should stay with you and Bono but I don’t think it’s the right atmosphere for him.”
“And why not?”
Edge awoke the next morning (or was it the afternoon?) with a sting in his eyes from the bright sun that drizzled past the lacey curtains through the bedroom window. Adjusting his view, he noticed Raven’s drawing pencils scattered about the wooden art table, almost as if they had been thrown in haste rather than just set down calmly. And as Edge sat up, his ears rang with four different, yet very familiar, voices.
He froze to listen more carefully. They weren’t happy tones, nor were they angry, but more hushed and muffled. They were talking about him, Edge knew. Now was not a time when Edge wanted to be the center of attention. If anything, he simply wanted to be left alone…
“I don’t think it’s a good idea, either,” Larry added, speaking for the first time. Bono, Adam and Raven all turned to the drummer with shock. They’d be discussing the same issue for the past hour and Larry hadn’t spoken a word until now.
Raven crossed her arms. “What? What’s wrong with the three of you,” she shot at the trio around her kitchen table. “Edge is comfortable here. He has a woman to talk to if need be. Being around men will only cause harm to him.”
“Harm,” questioned Bono, shaking his head. “How would Edge being around men put him in harm’s way, Raven? Forgive me, but I’d have to say that you’re being completely unreasonable and irresponsible.”
Edge’s jaw clenched. Little did Bono know that it was Raven who kept him alive last night. If not for her…
She held him. Sang to him. Raven did everything possible to take away the emotional and physical ache that he branded impossible to cure. Even if he woke up alone the next morning, for a few hours in the middle of the night, she’d made him feel like himself since the news of his broken marriage.
Didn’t that count for something? With the closest people in his life around him, Raven was the only one who took time to just sit with him in the deathly silence. No one should have to have to bask within the air Edge was living in. No one should have to go this insane. Yet Raven risked losing her own sanity for the sake of keeping Edge content, while Adam, Larry and Bono screamed and hollered from the other room.
Larry and Adam slammed their mouths shut, keeping their eyes lowered and away from the couple who were now quarrelling back and forth. Bono had crossed the line and they were all aware. None of them could do a thing about it.
“I’m being unreasonable? Fuck you, Hewson.”
Adam chuckled. Bono glared at his mate coldly, his blue eyes burning before turning his attention back to his wife who was now sulking and looking towards the ceiling.
“Edge needs to learn how to be comfortable with a bachelor type of life, Dalton. He’s not going to have a woman to spoil him any longer a-”
“How can you be such a bastard towards your best friend? He’s hurting and you don’t even give a shit!”
Bono stood up, the chair he’d been sitting on falling to the floor with such a powerful thud that it made Larry leap back slightly. Raven squinted at her husband and scowled, lulling her eyes. Edge sighed deeply, rubbing his temples. As if his headache was bad enough as it was. Now he had his mates practically battling over his custody.
“You shouldn’t even be in this conversation, Raven!”
Raven gasped as did Edge. What was Bono doing? This wasn’t like him at all.
“Bono,” Larry whispered. “Come on, mate, she’s been with us longer than a lot of ot-”
“No, Larry, really, it’s ok,” Raven smiled at the drummer, gathering herself to her feet. “If Bono doesn’t want me included then I will leave. Although I disagree with you, Bono, full heartedly. I didn’t see you waking up at three a.m. to soothe your best friend during the hardest time of his life. No. I’m not important at all.”
She went to the coat rack and slipped through her jacket while Bono, Larry and Adam gawked at her words. Edge finally emerged from behind the door he’d been hiding behind and bowed his head as Raven toed into her boots.
Damn it, he swore silently, he should have stepped in and stood up for her. After all that she did for him last night he couldn’t even say one word to defend her? What kind of friend did that make him? What type of man did that make him?
Bono shut his eyes and exhaled dramatically. “Where are you going?”
“To the shop of course,” she answered behind her shoulder, halfway out the door. “Out of your way and out of your business. Such is the foundation of our marriage.”
The house shook as she slammed the door behind her. Adam got up in a rage and shoved Bono forcefully. The singer toppled over and he caught himself before he joined the chair on the tile.
“What is your problem, Bono! Do you have to talk to her that way? And she wonders why we don’t want Edge staying here! Look at you! Your marriage is about as a sturdy as a sailboat in the middle of the ocean during a hurricane! Edge doesn’t need to be around that shit!”
“Calm down, Ad,” Bono gently said. “That’s why I said that to Raven. If I weren’t mean about it then she never would have agreed to let Edge stay with you. She would have fought until the end. You know Rave. She never stops.”
After putting on his own coat and shoes, Edge stormed into the kitchen, attracting the other three men in the room who gifted him with sincere and pitiful grins, each face displaying identical expressions of guilt.
Good, he thought bitterly, they should feel guilty…
“Hey, mate, how ya feelin’?” Adam asked.
The guitarist remained silent and, instead, glared at Bono and Adam. Although Bono did what he had to do, Edge wished that he wouldn’t have been so harsh towards Raven. How did Bono expect to get out of this one? Was Raven really that naive sometimes, Edge wondered?
“First of all,” Edge hissed. “Where I decide to go is not up to you. Or Adam. Or Larry.”
“Edge, mate, you know we’re only tryi-”
“Secondly, you don’t speak to Raven like that. Even if it was only to convince her to do something. Didn’t you see the look on her face? DO YOU WANT YOUR MARRIAGE ENDING UP LIKE MINE YOU FECKIN’ EEJIT!?”
Rushing out the door, Edge left hurryingly, leaving behind three very confused and stunned men to rethink their actions.
Meanwhile, Edge ran as fast as he could down the snowy streets of Dublin. He knew Raven wouldn’t have drove to the shop—she never did, especially when she’s angry.
When he spied the back of her Dublin Tattoo coat he sped to catch up, his lungs cold and fingers stiff.
“Raven! Rave!”
Raven paused, cocking a brow at the guitarist who was racing down the pavement, still in the clothes in which he slept, his hair in the nice, neat braid that she had created for him last night. Puffs of air escaped his lips in foggy heaps. When he finally reached her, Raven was astounded to be brought into his arms from about the waist and drawn towards his body.
“Edge, sweetie, what are you doing? You should be resting.”
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry about everything,” Edge cried, digging his face into Raven’s neck. She could feel his stubble across her skin—sharp and coarse.
She hugged him back. “Why are you apologizing? You have nothing to be sorry about.”
“Yes,” Edge shook his head, backing away just enough to look into her eyes, his hands on either side of her face. “Yes I do. Bono never should have said those things to you. And I’m sorry that you had to go through all of this because of me and-”
Raven shushed him immediately, placing a finger on his lips. “Shh, shh. It’s ok. I’m not angry at you or any of the other guys, either. Just…come to the shop with me, eh? Let’s warm up and…relax for a bit. Lord knows we both need that.”
Edge felt himself loosen into her touch.
“Ok,” he nodded. “Ok.”
Slowly Love and Drifting will be put to the side for awhile. This one here is my baby.
Here are the links to the latest chapters in case you had forgotten what is happening. Thank you for being patient with me! It means a ton!
Also, I will be adding a little description and a rating. Enjoy! Latest Chapters:
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-one-206286.html
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-two-206371.html
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-three-206455.html
http://www.u2interference.com/forums/f231/a-tender-trap-chapter-four-207266.html
Summary: Bono and Raven had the ideal marriage. But after the Joshua Tree tour, things start to go downhill. With Edge's own marriage hanging on a string and the tension within everyone involved, the band flees to Berlin to find artistic inspiration. Edge and Raven team together to escape the loneliness in their lives. How far will they go to feel complete again?
Rating (By Chapter): PG-13 for language
Author: LoveandLogic/AllAtOnce10 on Burning Down Love
Disclaimer:Don't know, don't own. Not getting money for this. Although it'd be a lot cooler if I was!
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That night she laid in bed next to her husband, his silhouette lined by the moonlight creeping in through the windows, the curves of his body illuminated as he rested on his side facing her. She wanted so badly to trace his lips, to feel the stubble on his chin beneath her fingertips. He looked so elegant like that, she thought, with his eyes closed and mouth slightly open - just enough for his soft breaths to escape. Strands of hair settled downward around his face like a chestnut brown spool of thread.
She adored his hair like this: long, soft and natural. She enjoyed the way it shone while brushing it after a shower, grouping it into a bow at the nape of his neck. She never wanted him to cut it. She had always told him that he looked best with long hair. And that’s exactly why he kept it long. Just for her. The little things. That’s what was important, isn’t it? Have they been so caught up in their separate lives that they had forgotten all about what they sacrificed for one another? She missed the old him-the Bono who used to laugh and joke. And she missed her old self as much as he did. She wasn’t the same artistic girl he fell for, the woman who would sit up with him for hours talking of life, religion and love. She was so serious now; too serious at times.
She reached out carefully and rearranged a strand of hair from his face, tucking it, instead, behind his ear. She felt his skin, grazing his cheek with the tips of her fingers, praying silently that she would be able to feel the same emotions that had weakened her all those years ago.
But she didn’t.
It’s not as though she felt nothing at all. She still loved him with all her heart. Things just weren’t the same for them anymore. They had grown apart as a lot couples often do, though the physical attraction was still there. She found him the most exquisite being she had ever set her eyes upon. Was that all that was there in the first place, she wondered? Just physical attraction? No. If that were the case she would still be deeply in love with him. They would still have that same intensity between them; the fire would still be aflame, forever in heat.
Things weren’t all right. So badly she wanted to tell him that she was angry at him. Angry for changing and angry for not lying only to herself but to him as well. Why didn’t she wake him and tell him this? She wanted to wake him, to talk to him and to make sure that he was really there-alive and breathing. Still hers.
But, she didn’t.
Instead, she left her husband to slumber and tiptoed downstairs to check on the man who was going through bigger problems than she was. The small light in the art room leaked through the hall and Raven used it as a guide. Outside, the wind howled and made the floors creak. Raven wrapped the small blanket tighter around her shoulders and, approaching the door, pushed it open slightly.
She’d expected Edge to still be passed out. After all, he had a rough night and surely he was well past exhausted. Raven, however, was surprised to see him wide awake, his knees at his chest and arms wrapped around his legs. She stood in the frame for a minute or so, watching him as he stared into a flame of a lit candle. Whether he saw it or not, Raven didn’t know. The flame was so minuscule compared to large monster that was now eating away at him. Her heart broke at the sight of her friend and she had not one clue on how to coax him out of his heartache.
Edge looked up at Raven and she gave him a pitiful excuse for a smile. He tried to smile as well, failing just as horribly as her. She walked over to him and sat down, neither of them saying a word. Together they stared into the flame, almost as though it possessed all the answers to their questions; beheld the truth for the lies and arms for comfort. It was silly, really, to gaze into something so fragile that could be broken by something as small as a gust of air.
Unable to tie the silence between them any longer, Raven looked to Edge and whispered, “are you ok?”
Edge shook his head. “I’m miserable, Raven.” He sighed. “I didn’t destroy anything too valuable, right?”
Raven forced Edge’s hands apart so she could lace her fingers through his. The gesture caused Edge to look at her, the fire dancing inside her almond eyes. She brought the back of his hand to her lips and placed a gentle kiss there.
“Don’t you worry about a thing, love,” she assured. “There were some photos that got ruined but I have the negatives. Some poems Bono wrote got ruined but they’re all songs now and paintings will come and go, wither with age. Nothing to be concerned about, ok?”
When he didn’t reply, Raven eyed him again. “Yes?”
“Yes,” he agreed. His head felt heavy and his temple rested on Ravens. His body was warm next to hers, their thighs pressed together and feet tangled. Raven felt somewhat guilty—being this comfortable and physical with another man aside from Bono. If a stranger were to peek in through the window, one would think that Raven and Edge were not just friends but lovers. There was something about the way they clung to one another; the way the silence between them was not deafening but serene.
“You’re welcome here, ya know,” she whispered, running the pad of her thumb across his bruised knuckles. She winced at the scabs. “You can stay here as long as you need to.”
She felt his head move against hers. “Aye. I know, Rave. But I don’t think it’s right to invade on you and Bono. It’s bad enough that I already…”
Edge’s words hung in the air like a bad scent of gasoline, the flame they both were so preoccupied just waiting to ignite. Raven’s body froze and shook at the same time. He didn’t have to finish. She already knew what he was going to say.
It’s bad enough that I already kissed you…
Raven cleared her throat, reached for her cigarette pack with a free hand and popped one of the sticks between her lips. She used the candle to light it before passing the pack to Edge, who took it from her with his empty hand as well. She didn’t want to let go of his fingers. She was afraid that if she did that it would only make Edge feel even worse about earlier. Also, his hand felt good in hers: his palm soft and delicate, but the pads of his fingers calloused and a tad rough from years of pushing into raw metal strings. When Edge’s eyes fell over her fingers he could see traces of dried up paint and silver pencil residue. It made the corners of his lips upturn. They were so alike in so many ways, yet neither spent the time to realize it.
“You should really get some sleep, love,” she told Edge, crushing her cigarette in the overstuffed ashtray. “It’s been a long day.”
Edge hummed in agreement. “Trust me, I want to sleep. Being awake just hurts too damn much…”
Raven stiffened and, for a moment, while tracing his face, debated whether or not to…
No. Raven Dalton, why are you even thinking of such things?!
“Sit up,” she instructed randomly. Edge did so without question and was bewildered by her actions as she grabbed something from the art table before settling behind him. She tucked one leg beneath her and the other hung over the ledge of the settee. Slowly, she removed Edge’s scarf from his head and removed the tight ponytail from the length of his hair.
Raven passed Edge the scarf and he balled the cloth inside his fist tightly. A steady warmth swam through his veins as he felt skilled fingers push into his taut shoulder muscles. Raven rested her chin on his shoulder, running her cheek across the little hairs on his face. He smelled faintly of whiskey but spiced with a scent that was truly his own.
“You poor thing,” cooed Raven in Edge’s ear, still resting in the ditch of his neck and shoulder, her lips only a breath away from his skin. “You’re so tense.”
“It’s been a rough day,” Edge stated the obvious for the umpteenth time that night. He moaned deeply at the feel of the knots in his back coming undone. “That feels nice…” he sighed. “How do you always know the right things to do?”
Raven chuckled. “I don’t. But we’ve all been through heartache. I guess I’m just trying to think of what my friends did for me when I was in pain. Am I helping? Am I taking away the pain, love?”
Sadly, the guitarist reached up and wrapped his long, elegant fingers around Raven’s wrist. His touch was inviting…warm and tender. Their eyes locked for what felt like centuries though it was merely moments. She studied the green background of his irises, the flame of the dim candle creating gold sparkles around the rims and pupil. His lips were slightly parted and she thought about what it would be like to have those lips on hers again...
She went back to earlier that night. Inside her imagination she could see herself pinned to the wall by Edge’s forceful strength, his fingers clamped around her wrists, so very unlike the grip he had on her now. Now it was as if he was holding onto her for dear life; that if he let go, he would surely drown in his own ocean of sorrow.
What would happen if he kissed her again? Would she kiss him back? Would she enjoy it? Give into it? Savor it?
Most importantly…would it cure him of all his suffering?
“Yes, Raven,” Edge answered weakly. “You’re helping to take away some of the pain. But…I think this is something that can’t be cured overnight.”
Nodding, Raven moved her hands to massage his scalp with the tips of her fingers. Edge melted, closing his eyes. Raven gripped the mane of his hair and began to brush out the strands with a comb, starting from the ends and making her way up.
“Since when did your hair get so long, Edge?” She chuckled, loving the way the tangles unraveled so easily at her touch.
Edge smiled for the first time that night. “Since Bono convinced me that it’s the cool thing to do.”
“And you actually believed him?”
He snorted. “Yeah, I guess that doesn’t sound like me at all, does it?”
Giggling now, Raven rolled her eyes and sighed. “Bono has a way of convincing people to do what they would not normally do. Ah, well, at least you take good care of it. I had expected a mess of knots but it’s really soft. I’m kind of jealous.”
“At least you’re not thinning. Fuck,” his voice went low, “now that Aislinn’s gone, who’s going to want a man in his thirties going bald?”
“Edge!” Raven cooed, now braiding the chocolate tresses. “Don’t talk like that. You’re a fantastic catch. Any woman would be lucky to have you.”
“Find me a woman like you and I might just believe it ,” he answered honestly, leaning his head back onto Raven’s chest. He grinned up at her and she shook her head.
“You’re just as impossible as Bono sometimes, you know that?”
“I wasn’t trying to be funny. I was serious.”
Raven’s face softened at the guitarist and she placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, her lips lingering a little longer than necessary. Edge relaxed into her, his feet outstretching along the couch, his hands blindly finding Raven’s so that he could grip them.
Raven rested her cheek on Edge’s head, bringing him close to her.
“I don’t want you to hurt, Edge,” she whispered into his hair. “I hate seeing you like this. I wish I could take it all away for you.”
A tear fell down his face. He kissed the back of her hands, resting his mouth on her knuckles. “Do you really want to help?”
“Of course.”
“Then just…hold me. Please.”
“Ok, Edge.”
She unraveled her legs, stretching them over the length of the settee. Edge rotated onto his side and laid his head upon Raven’s stomach, the rise and fall of her breathing lulling him to relaxation. She hadn’t put his scarf back on and her left hand was busy twirling the braid she’d just created while her right was snug below his chin.
Their legs created a confusing knot and he was warm against her; the stubble on his chin sharp against her knuckles. The room was unbelievably silent aside from the screeching wind outside the window. Gazing down at the guitarist in her arms, her heart and head went to war. After all, she should be upstairs with her husband, holding him close. Not his best mate. Not Edge.
This wasn’t wrong, she reminded herself. No boundaries were being crossed. There wasn’t any form of adultery occurring, nor were they being unfaithful. No. It wasn’t like that at all. Life was plundering down for both Raven and Edge. Who’s to say that couldn’t find comfort inside the arms of a close friend?
Some people had God.
They had each other.
“Baby, don’t worry,” Raven sang soothingly, “about a thing. Because every little thing…is gonna be alright…”
Edge smiled through the tears. “Rise up this mornin', smiled with the risin' sun, three little birds pitch by my doorstep…”
“Singin' sweet songs of melodies pure and true, sayin', ‘this is my message to you…’”
* * * *
“Raven, love, I understand why you feel like he should stay with you and Bono but I don’t think it’s the right atmosphere for him.”
“And why not?”
Edge awoke the next morning (or was it the afternoon?) with a sting in his eyes from the bright sun that drizzled past the lacey curtains through the bedroom window. Adjusting his view, he noticed Raven’s drawing pencils scattered about the wooden art table, almost as if they had been thrown in haste rather than just set down calmly. And as Edge sat up, his ears rang with four different, yet very familiar, voices.
He froze to listen more carefully. They weren’t happy tones, nor were they angry, but more hushed and muffled. They were talking about him, Edge knew. Now was not a time when Edge wanted to be the center of attention. If anything, he simply wanted to be left alone…
“I don’t think it’s a good idea, either,” Larry added, speaking for the first time. Bono, Adam and Raven all turned to the drummer with shock. They’d be discussing the same issue for the past hour and Larry hadn’t spoken a word until now.
Raven crossed her arms. “What? What’s wrong with the three of you,” she shot at the trio around her kitchen table. “Edge is comfortable here. He has a woman to talk to if need be. Being around men will only cause harm to him.”
“Harm,” questioned Bono, shaking his head. “How would Edge being around men put him in harm’s way, Raven? Forgive me, but I’d have to say that you’re being completely unreasonable and irresponsible.”
Edge’s jaw clenched. Little did Bono know that it was Raven who kept him alive last night. If not for her…
She held him. Sang to him. Raven did everything possible to take away the emotional and physical ache that he branded impossible to cure. Even if he woke up alone the next morning, for a few hours in the middle of the night, she’d made him feel like himself since the news of his broken marriage.
Didn’t that count for something? With the closest people in his life around him, Raven was the only one who took time to just sit with him in the deathly silence. No one should have to have to bask within the air Edge was living in. No one should have to go this insane. Yet Raven risked losing her own sanity for the sake of keeping Edge content, while Adam, Larry and Bono screamed and hollered from the other room.
Larry and Adam slammed their mouths shut, keeping their eyes lowered and away from the couple who were now quarrelling back and forth. Bono had crossed the line and they were all aware. None of them could do a thing about it.
“I’m being unreasonable? Fuck you, Hewson.”
Adam chuckled. Bono glared at his mate coldly, his blue eyes burning before turning his attention back to his wife who was now sulking and looking towards the ceiling.
“Edge needs to learn how to be comfortable with a bachelor type of life, Dalton. He’s not going to have a woman to spoil him any longer a-”
“How can you be such a bastard towards your best friend? He’s hurting and you don’t even give a shit!”
Bono stood up, the chair he’d been sitting on falling to the floor with such a powerful thud that it made Larry leap back slightly. Raven squinted at her husband and scowled, lulling her eyes. Edge sighed deeply, rubbing his temples. As if his headache was bad enough as it was. Now he had his mates practically battling over his custody.
“You shouldn’t even be in this conversation, Raven!”
Raven gasped as did Edge. What was Bono doing? This wasn’t like him at all.
“Bono,” Larry whispered. “Come on, mate, she’s been with us longer than a lot of ot-”
“No, Larry, really, it’s ok,” Raven smiled at the drummer, gathering herself to her feet. “If Bono doesn’t want me included then I will leave. Although I disagree with you, Bono, full heartedly. I didn’t see you waking up at three a.m. to soothe your best friend during the hardest time of his life. No. I’m not important at all.”
She went to the coat rack and slipped through her jacket while Bono, Larry and Adam gawked at her words. Edge finally emerged from behind the door he’d been hiding behind and bowed his head as Raven toed into her boots.
Damn it, he swore silently, he should have stepped in and stood up for her. After all that she did for him last night he couldn’t even say one word to defend her? What kind of friend did that make him? What type of man did that make him?
Bono shut his eyes and exhaled dramatically. “Where are you going?”
“To the shop of course,” she answered behind her shoulder, halfway out the door. “Out of your way and out of your business. Such is the foundation of our marriage.”
The house shook as she slammed the door behind her. Adam got up in a rage and shoved Bono forcefully. The singer toppled over and he caught himself before he joined the chair on the tile.
“What is your problem, Bono! Do you have to talk to her that way? And she wonders why we don’t want Edge staying here! Look at you! Your marriage is about as a sturdy as a sailboat in the middle of the ocean during a hurricane! Edge doesn’t need to be around that shit!”
“Calm down, Ad,” Bono gently said. “That’s why I said that to Raven. If I weren’t mean about it then she never would have agreed to let Edge stay with you. She would have fought until the end. You know Rave. She never stops.”
After putting on his own coat and shoes, Edge stormed into the kitchen, attracting the other three men in the room who gifted him with sincere and pitiful grins, each face displaying identical expressions of guilt.
Good, he thought bitterly, they should feel guilty…
“Hey, mate, how ya feelin’?” Adam asked.
The guitarist remained silent and, instead, glared at Bono and Adam. Although Bono did what he had to do, Edge wished that he wouldn’t have been so harsh towards Raven. How did Bono expect to get out of this one? Was Raven really that naive sometimes, Edge wondered?
“First of all,” Edge hissed. “Where I decide to go is not up to you. Or Adam. Or Larry.”
“Edge, mate, you know we’re only tryi-”
“Secondly, you don’t speak to Raven like that. Even if it was only to convince her to do something. Didn’t you see the look on her face? DO YOU WANT YOUR MARRIAGE ENDING UP LIKE MINE YOU FECKIN’ EEJIT!?”
Rushing out the door, Edge left hurryingly, leaving behind three very confused and stunned men to rethink their actions.
Meanwhile, Edge ran as fast as he could down the snowy streets of Dublin. He knew Raven wouldn’t have drove to the shop—she never did, especially when she’s angry.
When he spied the back of her Dublin Tattoo coat he sped to catch up, his lungs cold and fingers stiff.
“Raven! Rave!”
Raven paused, cocking a brow at the guitarist who was racing down the pavement, still in the clothes in which he slept, his hair in the nice, neat braid that she had created for him last night. Puffs of air escaped his lips in foggy heaps. When he finally reached her, Raven was astounded to be brought into his arms from about the waist and drawn towards his body.
“Edge, sweetie, what are you doing? You should be resting.”
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry about everything,” Edge cried, digging his face into Raven’s neck. She could feel his stubble across her skin—sharp and coarse.
She hugged him back. “Why are you apologizing? You have nothing to be sorry about.”
“Yes,” Edge shook his head, backing away just enough to look into her eyes, his hands on either side of her face. “Yes I do. Bono never should have said those things to you. And I’m sorry that you had to go through all of this because of me and-”
Raven shushed him immediately, placing a finger on his lips. “Shh, shh. It’s ok. I’m not angry at you or any of the other guys, either. Just…come to the shop with me, eh? Let’s warm up and…relax for a bit. Lord knows we both need that.”
Edge felt himself loosen into her touch.
“Ok,” he nodded. “Ok.”
he has different reactions.
I know, I punch like the girl that I am.
poor Larry. 
I seriously need to peel away from the screen! 
) Bono and the others....I don´t like their actitude to his friend and the girl.....
