IO: We'd better get to the tower, Lieutenant.

[elevated_u2_fan]

We have no tower, sir.


No tower?



Just a bridge, sir.



Why the HELL aren't I notified about these things?

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Dr. Stone, would you give the court your impression of Mr. Striker?


I'm sorry, I don't do impressions... my training is in psychiatry.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Over Macho Grande?


No. I don't think I'll ever get over Macho Grande.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Quick, you must get everybody into the lounge.


But we don't have a lounge...


That's not important right now.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Don't worry about the Viatex account, we have a buy or sell option; we can't get hurt in either case. Just keep on top of their legal people, Bob.


Will do.


And Bob, feed the cats.


Will do.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Do you swear on the Constitution of the United States to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?


Ain't no thing.


Would you describe, in your own words, what happened that night?


Check it, bleed. Bro... was ON! Didn't trip. But the folks was freakin', Man. Hey, and the pilots were laid to the bone, Homes.


So Blood hammered out and jammed jet ship. Tightened that bad sucker inside the runway like a mother. Shiiit.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

And how about the time we hopped in the family car and drove all the way to Woodstock?


Oh, that was a time. You got hold of that bad acid and didn't come down for two weeks, you kept telling everyone that you were Jesus Christ and then you jumped off a roof 'cause you thought you could fly!


What a bummer.


No shit.

 

[Headache in a Suitcase]

shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhft shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhft

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Dad never slaps me around at home, must be his coffee...


No, I've been serving him decafe. Maybe he's just an asshole.

 

[UberBeaver]

I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up till now.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0835992/
Well, let's see. First the earth cooled. And then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died and they turned into oil. And then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes Benzes. And Prince Charles started wearing all of Lady Di's clothes. I couldn't believe it.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Where is the passenger processing lounge for the lunar shuttle?


Concourse lounge C, fourth level.


Thank you.


Next?


How long is my parking permit good for?


Two hours.


Thank you.


Yes, next?


What's the fastest animal on Earth?


The cheetah. Next?


Should I fake my orgasms?


Yes.


Thank you.


Next?

 

[waynetravis]

Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain, Captain Oveur.

 

[Lila64]

concentrate... concentrate... I've got to concentrate... concentrate... concentrate... Hello?... hello... hello... Echo... echo... echo... Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon... Manny Mota... Mota... Mota...

 

[waynetravis]

lmao

 

[waynetravis]

The cockpit? What is it?

 

[hardyharhar]

What it is big mama

Cut me some slack jack. Chump don't want no help, chump don't get no help

He say he can't hang

Jive ass dude ain't got no brains anyhow

 

[corianderstem]

Excuse me, miss. I speak jive.

 

[hardyharhar]

She's gonna catch you on da rebound on da med side

 

[waynetravis]

Nervous?

Yes.

First time?

No, I've been nervous lots of times.

 

[hardyharhar]

captain, how soon can we land

I can't tell

You can tell me, I'm a doctor

 

[waynetravis]

Jim never has a second cup of coffee at home...

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Striker was the squadron leader. He brought us in real low. But he couldn't handle it.


Buddy couldn't handle it? Was Buddy one of your crew?


Right. Buddy was the bombardier. But it was Striker who couldn't handle it, and he went to pieces.


*Andy* went to pieces?


No. Andy was the navigator. He was all right. Buddy went to pieces. It was awful how he came unglued.


*Howie* came unglued?


Oh, no. Howie was a rock, the best tailgunner in the outfit. Buddy came unglued.


And he bailed out?


No. Andy hung tough. Buddy bailed out. How he survived, it was a miracle.


Then Howie survived?


No, 'fraid not. We lost Howie the next day.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the white zone.


The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the red zone.


The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in the white zone.


No, the white zone is for loading of passengers and there is no stopping in a RED zone.


The red zone has always been for loading and unloading of passengers. There's never stopping in a white zone.


Don't you tell me which zone is for loading, and which zone is for stopping!


Listen Betty, don't start up with your white zone shit again. There's just no stopping in a white zone.


Oh really, Vernon? Why pretend, we both know perfectly well what this is about. You want me to have an abortion.


It's really the only sensible thing to do, if its done safely. Therapeutically there's no danger involved.

 

[Lila64]

Excuse me, I happened to be passing, and I thought you might like some coffee.

Oh, that's very nice of you, thank you.
Oh, won't you sit down?

Cream?
No, thank you, I take it black, like my men.

 

[BluRmGrl]

Surely, you can't be serious!
I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

Elaine, you're a member of this crew. Can you face some unpleasant facts?


No.

 

[waynetravis]

He's coming right for us!!!

*jumps out the window*

 

[Schmeg]

What can you make out of this?

Why, I can make a hat or a brooch or a pterodactyl...

 

[waynetravis]

Jim never vomits at home

 

[Lila64]

Auntie Em, Uncle Henry, Toto! It's a twister! It's a twister!