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Old 08-07-2014, 05:53 PM   #1
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IO: Laffy Taffy

Why was the ocean arrested?

 
Because it beat upon the shore.


When is Labor Day?

 
When mothers give birth.


What is a tree's favorite drink?

 
Root beer.


or ?
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Old 08-07-2014, 05:59 PM   #2
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I love this thread.
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Old 08-07-2014, 06:08 PM   #3
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https://twitter.com/Laffy_TaffyJoke

This joke was so fucking amazing that they used it twice in 6 weeks:

What did the policeman say to his tummy?

 
I've got you under a vest!


I like that it apparently takes 3-4 days to come up with this shit.
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Old 08-08-2014, 10:48 AM   #4
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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was assaulted.
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Old 08-15-2014, 06:44 PM   #5
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Ohhhh there's a bucket of Laffy Taffy in the office, gang.

What did Delaware?
 
A brand New Jersey!


What do pigs give on Valentine's Day?
 
Valenswines!
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Old 08-15-2014, 10:54 PM   #6
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I ate the bag I had so quickly that I forgot to make updates to the thread.
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Old 08-18-2014, 12:40 PM   #7
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I'm going to try and limit my Laffy Taffy gorging to one piece per day, so I won't make you all laugh too hard...

Why did the ghost join the team?

 
They neeeded some spirit!


Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?

 
Because then it would be a foot!

(For all you non-Americans/users of such measures, 12 inches = 1 Foot)
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Old 08-19-2014, 12:15 PM   #8
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Got an oldie, but 'goodie' today:

What can you never have for breakfast?

 
Lunch and Dinner!


What do you call a pig that does karate?
 

Porkchop!
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Old 08-27-2014, 11:10 AM   #9
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From Monday:

What is a parasite?

 
Something you see in Paris!


I forget what the second one on Monday was and Tuesday's were repeats.

Today:

Why is the baker so mean?
 

Because he beats the bread!


What's a fish's favorite country?
 

Finland!
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Old 08-27-2014, 12:40 PM   #10
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Now & Laters > Laffy Taffy




What kind of pants do Mario & Luigi wear?

 
Denim Denim Denim
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Old 08-27-2014, 12:59 PM   #11
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I had to look that one up, but once I did, I laffed.
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Old 08-27-2014, 01:18 PM   #12
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It's better with the vocal sound effect lol.
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Old 09-10-2014, 04:24 AM   #13
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Normal

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sicy View Post
Now & Laters > Laffy Taffy




What kind of pants do Mario & Luigi wear?

 
Denim Denim Denim
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Old 09-15-2014, 02:10 PM   #14
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I've been misbehaving and not sharing:

Why did they bury the battery?
 
Because it was dead!


How can you spot a dogwood tree?
 
By it's bark!
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Old 09-19-2014, 01:04 PM   #15
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This doesn't even make sense...

Why did the skeleton go to the movies alone?
 
He had no body to go with him!

But...he's a skeleton...not a ghost, or...spirit...or something. He still has a body. It's just...you know, sans flesh and what not.


Where did the bee sit?
 
On his Bee-hind!
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Old 10-07-2014, 06:41 PM   #16
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I forgot to share with you all the Joke So Bad it Made the News:

Q: Which garden has the most vegetables? A: Flash Garden

Is Laffy Taffy playing a joke on you? | Fox News

That's from 2006.

I got that joke on a Laffy Taffy...

...two weeks ago...they're still printing it.


Today:

How does a witch travel?

 
Ghost to Ghost!


How does every baseball player get a hit?

 
He sings a song!

WHAT?
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Old 10-21-2014, 04:14 PM   #17
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What is a Buckaneer?
 
Expensive corn!


How do you get an alien baby to sleep?
 
You rocket!
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