IO: I'm having an affair

[Dalton]

I don't even know how it happened. I swore it would never happen, but it has. I'm having an affair. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to tell my wife. I don't want to hurt my daughter. AGHHADGGGHHA!

It all started early last week when my boss came and said, "Hey we're heading to a trade show in two weeks in Atlanta. You don't have to go, but there's a spot available if you want to." I planned on telling him no, because I know what happens in Atlanta, but when he asked me for a final answer ... I said yes.

Fuck!!1!!! I've ruined everything.

What should I do?

BTW- I know I wrote this in the first person, but its really my friend who is going through this. I know all of his intimate details if it would help you help me.

Please help.

 

[LMP]

Is the girl/guy you're cheating with Hispanic?

 

[redhotswami]

You don't have to tell your wife. Just say that you like her new hair color and she'll be none the wiser.

 

[No spoken words]

Did you go to college?

Oh, this isn't "Ask the cheating douche bag", sorry.

 

[phillyfan26]

You showed her your ping pong skills, didn't you?

 

[U2isthebest]

Hey, it's the 21st century, man. Get down with your cheatin' self.

 

[BoMac]

I sympathize with your dilemna, I really do.

However, I feel a far more important issue needs to be addressed. I would like to know your opinions on the Grand Rapids Griffins of the AHL. Should they be in the NHL? And if so, they'd definitely beat the living crap out of the Chicago Blackhawks, am i rite?

 

[LemonMelon]

Hey, it's the 21st century, man. Get down with your cheatin' self.

As long as I can still have promiscuous sex with many anonymous partners without protection, while at the same time experimenting with mind-expanding drugs in a consequence-free environment, I'll be sound as a pound.

 

[Carek1230]

Isn't everyone doing it?

 

[Dalton]

Is the girl/guy you're cheating with Hispanic?

Awww man, I hadn't even stopped to consider that I might be having an affair with a man. Its a real possibility. That Atlanta, Germany is a crazy place. Anything could happen.

I'm sure that my tempter will be hispanic of some sex. They have loose morals.

You don't have to tell your wife. Just say that you like her new hair color and she'll be none the wiser.

On most occasions, I believe this would be a winning tactic. However in this occasion, I need to come up with something better since I'm going to be gone for a week....

I sympathize with your dilemna, I really do.

However, I feel a far more important issue needs to be addressed. I would like to know your opinions on the Grand Rapids Griffins of the AHL. Should they be in the NHL? And if so, they'd definitely beat the living crap out of the Chicago Blackhawks, am i rite?

This is the stupidest post in the whole thread. The Griffins basically ARE in the NHL. And with their record, I believe they are like 3rd or 4th in points.

Everyone knows this.

 

[U2isthebest]

As long as I can still have promiscuous sex with many anonymous partners without protection, while at the same time experimenting with mind-expanding drugs in a consequence-free environment, I'll be sound as a pound.

Hookers and blow! Pat O'Brien is my boyfriend.

 

[UberBeaver]

How do you hit that shit in Atlanta?

 

[No spoken words]

How do you hit that shit in Atlanta, Germany?

Fixed.

 

[LMP]

Awww man, I hadn't even stopped to consider that I might be having an affair with a man. Its a real possibility. That Atlanta, Germany is a crazy place. Anything could happen.

I'm sure that my tempter will be hispanic of some sex. They have loose morals.

 

[No spoken words]

Just wait until your 6th date, YLB.

YLB, did you notice that Space Moon launched?

 

[LMP]

I'm dating Nate?

Yes.

 

[lynnok]

Have you thought about the RECESSION? At least you could stay in this country and support the economy.

 

[gvox]

Why do I feel like we're in the middle of an interference writer's strike?

 

[Diemen]

You don't have to tell your wife. Just say that you like her new hair color and she'll be none the wiser.

LMAO.




Nicely played.

 

[LemonMelon]

Why do I feel like we're in the middle of an interference writer's strike?

We're trying to make this go as smoothly and professionally as possible.





GIMME MAH FUCKIN' MONEY BIATCHES