Why?

Ava Adore · 12-30-2001, 01:37 AM

This isn't a poem, this isn't even prose. This is just me wondering why? Why is it that no matter how many times you have had your heart broken it hurts just the same. Why is it that we don't learn from past hurts, so that future hurts just don't hurt? Why can't we be that tough?

Maybe too much information for this board to digest, but I need to talk, and talk I will. I fell in love. It was amazing. It blew me away, it happened so fast and swept me off my feet. I even started to believe that this was it, the one. Me, who was never, ever destined to be married had finally found that special person to make that dream come true. Thing is, I don't care about marriage, I just want to find love. Someone to grow old with and to never be alone again, but I am alone and it hurts. I still love him and that hurts more. We will always be friends and he will always be so special to me. We were just born on opposite ends of the planet.

I don't know why I am telling you all this but whatever, we have all had our hearts broken. Why pretend it not to be true? I do believe everything in life happens for its own reason, but what is the reason in this? So that I can never trust again? Never believe again? Never love again? I am not sure I can. Help me to see that it is possible.

Hearts gone astray
Keeping up when they go
I went away
Just when you needed me so
You won't regret
I'll come back begging you
Don't you forget
Welcome love we once knew
Yeah

Open up your eyes
Then you'll realize
Here I said was my
Everlasting love

Need you by my side
Come and be my pride
You'll never be denied
Everlasting love

From the very start
Open up your heart
Feel the love you've got
Everlasting love

This love will last forever
This love will last forever

Hearts gone astray
Keeping up when they go
I went away
Just when you needed me so
You won't regret
I'll come back begging you
Don't you forget
Welcome love we once knew
Yeah...

When love's river flows
No one really knows
'Til someone's there to show the
Way to lasting love

Like the sun it shines
Endlessly it shines
You always will be mine
Eternal love

Whatever love went wrong
Ours would still be strong
We'd have our own
Everlasting love

This love will last forever
This love will last forever

Open up your eyes
Then you'll realize
Here I said was my
Everlasting love

Need you by my side
Come and be my pride
Never be denied
Everlasting love

From the very start
Open up your heart
Feel the love you've got

Everlasting love

I just might the most pathetic person you all will ever cross paths with.

------------------
...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time.

**Sicy** · 12-30-2001, 01:39 AM

(((((( HUGS )))))))

You will know when its meant to be.

The Wanderer · 12-30-2001, 01:52 AM

nevermind. take care of yourself Ava Adore

[This message has been edited by The Wanderer (edited 12-30-2001).]

zooropamanda · 12-30-2001, 01:53 AM

*speechless*

Salome · 12-30-2001, 05:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ava Adore:
I do believe everything in life happens for its own reason

I don't think that is true

------------------
Salome
Shake it, shake it, shake it

bono_man · 12-30-2001, 05:44 AM

Take it easy my dear...**hugs**

------------------
"we're free to fly the crimsom sky...the sun won't melt our wings tonight..."

LarryMullen's POPAngel · 12-30-2001, 11:11 AM

(((((Hugs)))))

------------------
The future is so predictable the past is too uncomfortable

Ava Adore · 12-30-2001, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Salome:
I don't think that is true

Why do you say that Salome? Indulge me.

Sorry for the post guys, I was feeling pretty lame last night. Not that things are all that much better today, I guess I am just starting to see the reality and virtual impossibleness ( <-- word?) of the situation.
We've all been here before, so I guess in a way I thought it would help to see that, and it has, thx.

------------------
...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time.

BabyGrace · 12-30-2001, 03:03 PM

you know I feel so much the way you do, for entirely different reasons, but everything you said sounds so much like something I'd post right now.

I don't know why. I wish I did. Maybe there is no why, but sorry Salome, i tend to disagree with you..
i don't really believe in fate, but there is something that can be take from everything, therefore giving everything reason. not that that makes any sense

I don't know. I'm thinking of you.

------------------
In the night of death, hope sees a star and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing.
~Robert Ingersoll

Salome · 12-30-2001, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ava Adore:

Why do you say that Salome? Indulge me.

Quote:

Originally posted by BabyGrace:
Maybe there is no why, but sorry Salome, i tend to disagree with you..
i don't really believe in fate, but there is something that can be take from everything, therefore giving everything reason.

I agree BabyG, a lesson can be learned from everything
from both good and bad things happening in your life
but I really don't think everything is supposed to be a lesson, some things just happen and if you want to see them as a lesson you can but you don't have to
some things just happen and even when you think you've learned a lesson because of it, the same thing might happen again next week/month/year/decade

things have happened in my life that have made little sense to me at all
I guess all those experiences have changed me
some changed me for the better, some a bit worse and some haven't changed me at all

I don't know whether I'm agreeing with you and just saying it differently or that we slightly disagree anymore

I do now my life became more enjoyable when I chose to pick the lessons I wanted to learn myself

------------------
Salome
Shake it, shake it, shake it

[This message has been edited by Salome (edited 12-30-2001).]

BabyGrace · 12-30-2001, 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Salome:
some things just happen and even when you think you've learned a lesson because of it, the same thing might happen again next week/month/year/decade
[/B]

but you may have learned how to deal with it a bit better. life can't be avoided but it can be dealt with

but I think we're agreeing anyway

------------------
In the night of death, hope sees a star and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing.
~Robert Ingersoll

Ava Adore · 12-30-2001, 11:35 PM

Interesting idea Salome. I kind of like the idea of not always having to learn from any given situation, but I think, we always do, whether consciously or not. I dunno. Life would surely be easier if we could just walk away, or easily move on from hurt and heartache. It would make acceptance so much easier.

------------------
...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time.

Solar Supernova · 12-31-2001, 01:35 AM

Very deep and straight to the point, congratulations. It takes not only guts to write something this lovely, but talent, creativity and definately feeling.

**Diemen** · 12-31-2001, 02:49 AM

I've definitely been in this boat before.

Love and relationships lie on a very finely balanced line. Too willing to give your heart away and you get used and trampled on, too reluctant to do so and you never get anywhere. Finding that point of equilibrium is a lifelong search for most. It definitely seems to be for me.

Sometimes it seems that time is a big enemy of love. Absence can either make the heart grow fonder or make the mind wander and the heart forget. I'm not entirely convinced of the "meant to be" thing, but sometimes it's the only thing to draw comfort from.

Life is odd (or cruel - or both). Things can go so amazingly well that you're grinning from ear to ear 24/7, and then you can see things slip away before your eyes. Sometimes without warning, but often times with warnings that stubborn hearts don't want to pay attention to.

And I don't know why a man
Searches for himself in his lover's eyes
No I don't know why a man
Sees the truth but needs the lies

Ugh.

It's late. I'm tired and sick, but too stubborn to go to bed. And I'm thinking too much and letting stupid little paranoid thoughts take too much hold. Take this with a grain of salt.

**Diemen** · 12-31-2001, 02:54 AM

As for your original question, well, if we toughen our hearts to not hurt as much, then with each successive person we lose more and more of our heart - of our passion and willingness to expose ourselves to danger for the sake of the possibility of something great. Love requires the willingness to put ourselves out there, naked - so to speak, for the possibility of something wonderful. If it falls, then yes, we do get hurt. But if we harden ourselves to not get hurt, then we're becoming less open to love - less willing to love, perhaps.

Hopeless romantics of the world, unite!

Ava Adore · 01-03-2002, 12:40 AM

Someone please put me out of my misery. I thought with each day it was supposed to get better.

------------------
...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time.

foray · 01-12-2002, 04:52 AM

Would it help if I told you that there is no The One, only The One whom you choose to share your life with? Future men whom you meet may not measure up to this guy you met recently (actually, I am positive that they won't measure up), but it's up to you whether you want to stay and hope for an equal passion or look to other men without comparing. Because it'd be a shame if you compared other men to this special guy. Hope things are looking up now.

foray

12-30-2001, 01:37 AM	#1
Ava Adore The Fly Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where boys fear to tread... Posts: 146 Local Time: 09:29 PM	Why? This isn't a poem, this isn't even prose. This is just me wondering why? Why is it that no matter how many times you have had your heart broken it hurts just the same. Why is it that we don't learn from past hurts, so that future hurts just don't hurt? Why can't we be that tough? Maybe too much information for this board to digest, but I need to talk, and talk I will. I fell in love. It was amazing. It blew me away, it happened so fast and swept me off my feet. I even started to believe that this was it, the one. Me, who was never, ever destined to be married had finally found that special person to make that dream come true. Thing is, I don't care about marriage, I just want to find love. Someone to grow old with and to never be alone again, but I am alone and it hurts. I still love him and that hurts more. We will always be friends and he will always be so special to me. We were just born on opposite ends of the planet. I don't know why I am telling you all this but whatever, we have all had our hearts broken. Why pretend it not to be true? I do believe everything in life happens for its own reason, but what is the reason in this? So that I can never trust again? Never believe again? Never love again? I am not sure I can. Help me to see that it is possible. Hearts gone astray Keeping up when they go I went away Just when you needed me so You won't regret I'll come back begging you Don't you forget Welcome love we once knew Yeah Open up your eyes Then you'll realize Here I said was my Everlasting love Need you by my side Come and be my pride You'll never be denied Everlasting love From the very start Open up your heart Feel the love you've got Everlasting love This love will last forever This love will last forever Hearts gone astray Keeping up when they go I went away Just when you needed me so You won't regret I'll come back begging you Don't you forget Welcome love we once knew Yeah... When love's river flows No one really knows 'Til someone's there to show the Way to lasting love Like the sun it shines Endlessly it shines You always will be mine Eternal love Whatever love went wrong Ours would still be strong We'd have our own Everlasting love This love will last forever This love will last forever Open up your eyes Then you'll realize Here I said was my Everlasting love Need you by my side Come and be my pride Never be denied Everlasting love From the very start Open up your heart Feel the love you've got Everlasting love I just might the most pathetic person you all will ever cross paths with. ------------------ ...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time. __________________

12-30-2001, 01:39 AM	#2
Sicy Sizzlin' Sicilian Forum Administrator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Bay Area, CA Posts: 71,093 Local Time: 10:29 PM	(((((( HUGS ))))))) You will know when its meant to be. __________________

01-12-2002, 04:52 AM	#17
foray Rock n' Roll Doggie Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: full of sound and fury Posts: 3,386 Local Time: 06:29 PM	Would it help if I told you that there is no The One, only The One whom you choose to share your life with? Future men whom you meet may not measure up to this guy you met recently (actually, I am positive that they won't measure up), but it's up to you whether you want to stay and hope for an equal passion or look to other men without comparing. Because it'd be a shame if you compared other men to this special guy. Hope things are looking up now. foray __________________

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12-30-2001, 01:52 AM	#3
The Wanderer Kid A Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Holy Roman Empire Posts: 5,271 Local Time: 12:29 AM	nevermind. take care of yourself Ava Adore [This message has been edited by The Wanderer (edited 12-30-2001).]

12-30-2001, 01:53 AM	#4
zooropamanda Rock n' Roll Doggie VIP PASS Join Date: Jul 2000 Location: Smile, you're reading my post Posts: 6,515 Local Time: 03:29 PM	speechless

12-30-2001, 05:44 AM	#6
bono_man Thom's Bitch Join Date: Dec 2000 Posts: 2,287 Local Time: 03:29 PM	Take it easy my dear...hugs ------------------ "we're free to fly the crimsom sky...the sun won't melt our wings tonight..."

12-30-2001, 11:11 AM	#7
LarryMullen's POPAngel Blue Crack Distributor Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: I'll be up with the sun, I'm not coming down... Posts: 53,698 Local Time: 12:29 AM	(((((Hugs))))) ------------------ The future is so predictable the past is too uncomfortable

12-30-2001, 03:03 PM	#9
BabyGrace Refugee Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: even NJ loves NY Posts: 2,095 Local Time: 12:29 AM	you know I feel so much the way you do, for entirely different reasons, but everything you said sounds so much like something I'd post right now. I don't know why. I wish I did. Maybe there is no why, but sorry Salome, i tend to disagree with you.. i don't really believe in fate, but there is something that can be take from everything, therefore giving everything reason. not that that makes any sense I don't know. I'm thinking of you. ------------------ In the night of death, hope sees a star and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing. ~Robert Ingersoll

12-30-2001, 11:35 PM	#12
Ava Adore The Fly Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where boys fear to tread... Posts: 146 Local Time: 09:29 PM	Interesting idea Salome. I kind of like the idea of not always having to learn from any given situation, but I think, we always do, whether consciously or not. I dunno. Life would surely be easier if we could just walk away, or easily move on from hurt and heartache. It would make acceptance so much easier. ------------------ ...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time.

12-31-2001, 01:35 AM	#13
Solar Supernova The Fly Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: germany Posts: 36 Local Time: 05:29 AM	Very deep and straight to the point, congratulations. It takes not only guts to write something this lovely, but talent, creativity and definately feeling.

12-31-2001, 02:49 AM	#14
Diemen Resident Photo Buff Forum Moderator Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Somewhere in middle America Posts: 13,687 Local Time: 12:29 AM	I've definitely been in this boat before. Love and relationships lie on a very finely balanced line. Too willing to give your heart away and you get used and trampled on, too reluctant to do so and you never get anywhere. Finding that point of equilibrium is a lifelong search for most. It definitely seems to be for me. Sometimes it seems that time is a big enemy of love. Absence can either make the heart grow fonder or make the mind wander and the heart forget. I'm not entirely convinced of the "meant to be" thing, but sometimes it's the only thing to draw comfort from. Life is odd (or cruel - or both). Things can go so amazingly well that you're grinning from ear to ear 24/7, and then you can see things slip away before your eyes. Sometimes without warning, but often times with warnings that stubborn hearts don't want to pay attention to. And I don't know why a man Searches for himself in his lover's eyes No I don't know why a man Sees the truth but needs the lies Ugh. It's late. I'm tired and sick, but too stubborn to go to bed. And I'm thinking too much and letting stupid little paranoid thoughts take too much hold. Take this with a grain of salt.

12-31-2001, 02:54 AM	#15
Diemen Resident Photo Buff Forum Moderator Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: Somewhere in middle America Posts: 13,687 Local Time: 12:29 AM	As for your original question, well, if we toughen our hearts to not hurt as much, then with each successive person we lose more and more of our heart - of our passion and willingness to expose ourselves to danger for the sake of the possibility of something great. Love requires the willingness to put ourselves out there, naked - so to speak, for the possibility of something wonderful. If it falls, then yes, we do get hurt. But if we harden ourselves to not get hurt, then we're becoming less open to love - less willing to love, perhaps. Hopeless romantics of the world, unite!

01-03-2002, 12:40 AM	#16
Ava Adore The Fly Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Where boys fear to tread... Posts: 146 Local Time: 09:29 PM	Someone please put me out of my misery. I thought with each day it was supposed to get better. ------------------ ...to the mystery of all that you should ever leave behind, in time.