VERSus

[U1]

The dance of a dawning light
Can be heard in the yellow valley.
Tanned was earth on the water ballet:
The spark of a mourning plight.

The bark of a morning palm
Fanned the mirth to the watcher battle.
Then sunbirds flew in a low rattle:
The glance at a burning calm.

 

[wizard2c]

reply

Very nice.....like the part of the dance of the dawning light......I relate it to my early morning dreams.

carol
wizard2c

 

[lazarus]

I don't see this rhyming structure very often, but you pulled it off wonderfully. I'm assuming from your location that english isn't your first language, and I really like the different perspective and word choice.

great imagery, and my favorite line is "tanned was earth on the water ballet"

encore, s'il vous plait!

 

[For Honor]

.....burning calm......





makes me think...