"On Love" - - - An open discussion

[For Honor]

The closer you get to the fire, the more you can get burned.....


For some reason.... I still am a dreamer about love, I guess. I don't know why I am, I don't quite understand. I think that by all typical means, I'd be.... thinking about anything but love. It goes against everything in my personality research, save for one zodiac things.


I know how you feel, lady luck.

I think the thing is to find someone who shares that belief. I think love really can be eternal, you just have to find someone who..... wants what you want.

Communication and expectations, communication and expectations...

And sacrificing for the improvment of the relationships; selflessness....

Those are the 'big 3', to my knowledge....

 

[lady luck]

For Honor, did you find The ground beneath her feet?

 

[For Honor]

no, not yet

 

[lady luck]

Want an email?

 

[lady luck]

Communication and expectations, communication and expectations...

And sacrificing for the improvment of the relationships; selflessness....

Those are the 'big 3', to my knowledge....

Having fixed points is ok -- even if I don't know if the points you mentioned are the right ones.

The closer you get to the fire, the more you can get burned.....

True. But my (real) name means "in good health & strong".
I'll survive.

 

[For Honor]

those 3 points were not fixed, just 3 qualities , 3 catagories that help determine how strong a relationship is

 

[lady luck]

and perhaps these "categories" are different for every person

I think communication is a good starting point -- but unfortunately I am not the kind that can put out everything.
Leaving your ego apart, yes: that's another good point. It should be "not I or you, but we". And I think this is not referred just to love affairs, but to any real relation one has.

As for expectations... well, that's the hardest one for me.
And I am not even sure I understood what you mean with that.

 

[For Honor]

expectations......

as in, what both people want out of the relationship


essentially, that is the most critical, important one......



For instance -


one person wants a casual friendship, the other wants a commited relationship.
one person wants a few sexual flings here and there, the other is looking for true love
one person is very interested in their career, and wants companionship on the side, while the other is interested in spending lots and lots of time together, every day.
one person enjoys being just friends, while the other wants to move in and live together
one person wants to get married and have kids, the other is still figuring out who they are in life and doesn't want that sort of commitment


Expectations is what you expect the relationship to be, or even, become. Everyone has them, even if they don't know it. Different people think differently, too, so, it's all relevant to the two people that are involved in the relationship.


For whatever relationship type you want, or invovlved in, it's best if both people are on the same page, and working towards the same goal. I think it cuts out a lot of wasted time if people set things straight in this regard. Of course, relationships develop over time and such, but

this is where communication comes in.

*Expecations* need to be *communicated*


once proper *communication* is established, then, if neccesary, the two can *sacrifice* for the relationship.



Of course, that is more or less a blueprint, a ... a... uh.... I "script" to follow, guidelines to follow.


But realize, to, that this is me, FH, Jesse, saying these things. Everything I ever say is related to my personality, and how I view the world. The same is true for everyone else. So to me, FH, this is my opinion. Everyone is different in that regard.

I will say this, though, I do earnestly seek the best way for things to work. I suppose I have an inclination towards "efficiency", as in, I try to find things that work, and things that work the best.



but that's just me

 

[lady luck]

can the expectations of two different human beings be the same?

I suppose it can happen -- or at least people could find a way to meet halfway.

sort of finding the best way to go on well together.

And I am sure you can do this just when you care for he other person so much that you are ready to renounce to a position you had -- or at least to change your point of view on a issue.

As you said, this would require a lot of selflessness and it is fundamental that the people involved really want to walk together.

 

[For Honor]

Want an email?

!!! I totally missed this post!


Sure, I'd like an email !

 

[lady luck]

Send me your address (a PM, if you don't want to post it) amd I'll send ypu the mp3

 

[For Honor]

joshuatreepride@aol.com


Thanks!

 

[lady luck]

I sent it, but I've the suspect you won't get it...

 

[lady luck]

Back to the subject of this thread,
I'm thinking about love too much

It's incredible how much energy it can give & take away.

the more I go, the more I discover.
It's interesting, but also ....

I suppose it depends on the situation I'm on and that I'm rely too much on a couple of words written down in a quick message

It's awful to miss the contacts and to be obliged to wait not knowing what's going on to the person you care for.

 

[lady luck]

I'm sorry I keep on boring you with my thoughts about this person that is just so faraway...

But interference is the quickest way I know to put things out of my mind!

 

[For Honor]

I know all to well how itfeels, and I don't mind you talking about it. I know exactly what it's like... believe it or not.

 

[lady luck]

I believe you.

 

[lady luck]

I don't think there's any reason for you not to be sincere, especially in talking to a perfect stranger living on the other side of the world.

 

[For Honor]

Sometimes it is too easy to focus on love.

ANd it takes a way from other parts of your life. Especially for me. So I need to remember to keep a balance.


While an all consuming love is.... slightly enticing, or desireable, I wonder how practical it is

 

[lady luck]

I suppose it's not practical at all.
And I don't know if we can say that the people who have that kind of love -- assuming it exists -- are lucky or not.

*********

I think I am realising I'm in a situation that's not possible.
It's as if I'm getting awake, slowly, step after step.
Don't like this feeling...

I'm becoming aware of a series of things that are not working...
It's quite disappointing -- for a moment I thought I was almost there , but it's not like that

Once again, I am wrong.

 

[For Honor]

^

I ...... I once again can relate to that.

Hahahaha, I don't mean to laugh...... I'm just surprised.
I know what it's like


Here's to the best

 

[lady luck]

why surprised?

 

[For Honor]

That someone else is going through something simlar to what I'm going through/ gone through.



I don't know, it's one of those things where you think you are sort of alone in it.

I mean, I sort of wish I was, so that you would have to go through something unfortunate like this, but it's kind of nice to know that you're not alone.

If that makes any sense .
heh heh

 

[lady luck]

it doesn't make sense

but I appreciate it, anyway!

 

[For Honor]

well that's what's important.

 

[lady luck]

Similar experiences.
I think more or less every one goes through the same problems and the same experiences
Only reactions can be very different and the traces these things leave on you can be just small wrinkles on your face or the deepest cut.

 

[For Honor]

I think I'm going to stop doing writings about love, save one or two, for a while.

The 2 exceptions are things I've already got in my mind. But after I'm finished with those, I'll be stepping away from the atmosphere of love for a while - spent far too much time thinking about it, and now is not the time in my life to do so.

So this is a sort of farewell, at least for a while.
until next time......