Would you consider this creepy?

[U2Girl1978]

I posted this in my journal but I wanted to see what you all thought.

On my commute to work every morning, there's this guy who is usually on my bus. He is really really creeping me out. He is weird and icky. I've noticed that he has a tendency to stare at me and only me. If I go to the back of the bus there he is turning around in his seat to stare. One time, he got on the bus and there were so many other seats he decides to sit right next to me. Another time, he sat right behind me but was sitting forward like he was trying to sniff my hair. Yesterday as he was about to get off the bus he was standing there in front of me and staring at me. It's such an intense stare. It's like he's going to bore a hole through my head or something. I don't think I can do anything about it because he I only see him on the bus and that's the only time that he does it. But it's getting to the point where it's freaking me out. He's been doing this off and on for a looong time now.

What do I do? Do I say something to him? The staring is completely ridiculous and you can't not notice it!

 

[U2Man]

I didn't know you and Chizip lived in the same city.

 

[Bonochick]

I didn't know you and Chizip lived in the same city.

In all seriousness though...I'd be creeped out too!

I wouldn't say anything to him...he'd probably like that you actually made some sort of contact with you. I'd either get lost in my iPod or a book. On a more extreme level...is there anyway to sort of hide yourself? Like, wearing a hood and glasses? If you truly are creeped out, that may not seem like such a weird option.

 

[beegee]

that's good advice, U2man



'78, that is one of the creepiest things i have ever heard. i'm not sure exactly what you could do about it. maybe find out what the bus company's policies are on harassment? then you could file a complaint.

 

[JCOSTER]

Could you take a bus that comes a few minutes earlier, or even later, this way you can miss him?

 

[girlhappy]

I wouldnt take that as a joke. I was sort of "victim" of that kind of guys in the sense i was looking back!
And that could become obsession if you like the guy , you know.
I dont know, call me nuts, but thats the way it was.

 

[ruffian]

creepy trust your intuitions, and try to take a different bus, even if it means being early/late to work.

 

[Muggsy]

yeah, that's really creepy. personally I don't react well to that kind of stuff, I can imagine myself saying something rude to the guy ("hey mofo, do I own you money or what son of a &%"·$&%!!! ).. but I will think on something better

I don't know... Is there someone who might be with you in the bus?, I would start to make friends there, even of the bus driver. Or maybe, Like Jcoaster said, take the bus 5 minutes earlier if that is possible.

 

[U2Girl1978]

I'm probably going to have to take the bus earlier because this is ridiculous.

 

[U2Girl1978]

In all seriousness though...I'd be creeped out too!

I wouldn't say anything to him...he'd probably like that you actually made some sort of contact with you. I'd either get lost in my iPod or a book. On a more extreme level...is there anyway to sort of hide yourself? Like, wearing a hood and glasses? If you truly are creeped out, that may not seem like such a weird option.

Oh believe me I read or tinker with my phone but the guy will not stop staring. It's one of those stares that you can feel. ugh!

He was on my bus today and the stupid bus got into an accident and we all had to walk to the next bus stop. There he is staring at me while I'm talking to someone at the bus stop.

I've wanted to say something to him but I don't think it's a good idea.

 

[JCOSTER]

I used to take the train into NYC and park in a library parking lot where I worked when I got off the train. One day there was a note on my front seat I thought it was from my boyfriend and it turned out to be the guy in the gas station behind the parking lot was breaking into my car and leaving me notes and flowers, he would use that jimmy thing to open my car!!!!! I spoke to the owner and he was later fired, and I had to find a new parking spot!

 

[U2Girl1978]

I used to take the train into NYC and park in a library parking lot where I worked when I got off the train. One day there was a note on my front seat I thought it was from my boyfriend and it turned out to be the guy in the gas station behind the parking lot was breaking into my car and leaving me notes and flowers, he would use that jimmy thing to open my car!!!!! I spoke to the owner and he was later fired, and I had to find a new parking spot!

That's crazy!

 

[U2Man]

Maybe you should take your boyfriend with you one day, if possible, and if he still stares at you the same way while you're with him, perhaps your boyfriend could ask him what the deal is?

 

[U2Girl1978]

Maybe you should take your boyfriend with you one day, if possible, and if he still stares at you the same way while you're with him, perhaps your boyfriend could ask him what the deal is?

I could do that.

Sometime last year, me and one of my guy friends was on the bus and he still stared. He's so blatant with how he does it too.

 

[Muggsy]

I used to take the train into NYC and park in a library parking lot where I worked when I got off the train. One day there was a note on my front seat I thought it was from my boyfriend and it turned out to be the guy in the gas station behind the parking lot was breaking into my car and leaving me notes and flowers, he would use that jimmy thing to open my car!!!!! I spoke to the owner and he was later fired, and I had to find a new parking spot!

 

[Bonochick]

I wouldn't say anything to him...he'd probably like that you actually made some sort of contact with you.

Of course, I meant to say that he'd probably like that you actually made some sort of contact with HIM, not with you...

 

[LarryMullen's POPAngel]

There's a creepy maintenence guy who works around my complex. Once I saw him next to me in line at the store right around the corner and nearly jumped out of my skin. I turned around and he was staring at me with a creepy smile on his face, which seems to be fixed there permantly.

I try to avoid him when I see him coming, which luckily isn't very often since the crew works from 7-4 and I'm at work then.

But, this isn't about me... I'd suggest taking the earlier bus, you can never be too careful.

 

[Sicy]

Definately creepy

Though I am the type of person that would be like 'WTF ARE YOU LOOKING AT!!?? '




I flip people off on the road when I'm in my car.. I mouth 'WHAT!?' all the time.. lol. if I feel them staring at me at a light or something. It's just annoying especially when you can actually see the drool falling out of their mouth and they have this look on their face like they want to do ... things .. to you

 

[U2Girl1978]

I am extremely tempted to say something, flip him off, anything.

 

[Liesje]

Um, yeah, I would consider that (and all the other storied here) creepy. I hate catching the same person staring on more than one occasion. Weird.

The creepiest thing like that that's ever happened to me was in high school. I got done at 12:55pm so I was home alone before my parents and sibs. One day this guy came to the door and said he was Oscar the neighborhood friendly guy. He didn't seem like he was selling anything since he wasn't giving the same magazine sale spiel they all do, but he had this black case. He kept trying to make small talk and then said I was beautiful and asked if he could come in and take my picture. I was like, "uh, no way. Gotta run, bye!" and he politely left. I didn't really care since I'm not so dumb I'd let a weirdo into the house. My dad overheard me talking about it a few days later, flipped out, and made me file a police report! Funny thing is, I remember at the time thinking the guy was rather pervy so I made a point of memorizing every detail about his appearance, so I had to give it all to the police. Nothing else ever happened

 

[U2Girl1978]

That's indeed very scary. There are alot of weirdos out there.

 

[Mr. BAW]

#1 - if this fellow is, indeed, a stalker, you've placed yourself in a routine that he's used to...mixing up your trains and buses might be the way to go...

#2 - if you dare challenge him directly and ask why he keeps staring at you, you should do this within earshot of others; with witnesses, he may just back off...I wouldn't suggest doing this alone, face-to-face...

#3 - most bus lines and train centers have a security operative..why not call the bus line ahead of time, ask to speak with security and maybe you and one of their operatives can set up a sting on this guy...the officers have the power to at least check this guy out and see what his motives might be..

#4 - finally, if you find yourself alone with him in the same area, get up and move, sit near the driver or train operator...don't isolate yourself...and if you do, always position yourself where you have a WAY out on either side of you...

And, if you see this guy, scream like hell.............

 

[u2bonogirl]

Yeah, I would take a different route if possible
I would suggest making out with your boyfriend in front of him but that might actually trigger something bad.
This one guy that was stalking me went off the deep end and started screaming when he saw me with another guy. Apparently he thought I was "his" Blech

 

[zoney!]

nice, rick!



I was going to suggest changing up your schedule a bit in your journal...then I saw a creepy picture of me here!

Think of it this way....since you have been the sunshine of his morning, I think it is time to give him a cloudy day. Find an earlier commute...or take an alternative routing. Luckily, you live in a bigger city where this is possible.

 

[Thora]

I like Mr. BAW's suggestions.

I'm so sorry you're having to go thru this! Sounds so creepy.

Hopefully you'll find a solution soon!

 

[BonosBaby12]

I would go with changing up your scheldule. Nothing I hate more than to be stared at. Especially with the way that this guy is doing it. When I lived in town I was walking home from the store and had this guy following me. He eventually turned away in the opposite direction (he was on a bike) but it was really weird. So yeah it's EXTMRELEY creepy with what you are going through! Hope you are able to get away from this weirdo soon. Good luck

 

[U2Girl1978]

I also see him going home too. The bus that I take lets me off at my street so I would hate having to switch my whole schedule around because of this loser.

 

[U2democrat]

I'm just curious, about how old does this guy look? Is he clean/dirty? Does he seem to be employed?

Just general questions. If it gets too bad you can always kick him in the nuts


Seriously though...I like the advice others have given about riding with your boyfriend and getting him to ask the dude what's up.

 

[U2Girl1978]

He's clean and has glasses and looks to be in his 40's or 50's. I think he's employed.

 

[VintagePunk]

Maybe you should take your boyfriend with you one day, if possible, and if he still stares at you the same way while you're with him, perhaps your boyfriend could ask him what the deal is?

That's a really good idea.


Jules, that IS really creepy. If he happened to get off at the same stop as you, do you have a plan in place? Is it in a busy, populated area where you could get help immediately? For your sake, I hope so.

I had a similar experience in HS. I used to wait at this bus stop, and for about a month, this older man would stand at the corner across the street and just STARE. I tried to ignore it till one day I got off the bus and met some friends in the school parking lot. I looked across the street, and there he was, sitting in a car, staring at me. He'd obviously followed the bus. I was really freaked out, but then a friend had the presence of mind to memorize his license plate number. We went to the office, the police were called, and it never happened again.

I'm worried for you, that his behaviour may escalate. Please don't take any chances, and stay safe.