Kiki
New Yorker
alright so many of you know of this one particular friend of mine, due to the "Bridesmaid Nightmare" thread of mine.
So ya'll know about the problems she and her on again/off again fiance have.
So we go out to dinner on Saturday night, me, Brian(my husband), her and her fiance and her son.
Alright, so we're laughing and joking around and the sarcasim and jokes start flying. They were poking jokes at me and Brian, and we were giving it right back. No big deal, it was all good fun.
Brian was joking around with Rick and said something along the lines of "Oh, I've not met this beautiful girlfriend of yours".
We all laughed, no big deal. My friend goes crazy a minute later, on her fiance. "Why don't you ever defend me? Why can't you stick up for me??? You NEVER DO and I'm sick of it."
I was sitting there like......whoa, ok we're in a resturant....calm the hell down.
I didn't see how it was a big deal, yeah ok the comment Brian made could have been really mean if it wasn't how we joke around with these particular friends. They've done much worse to me that Brian's not appreciated, totally joking about me being a slut, etc. Yah it stings and it's kind of like....am I really making you think that? or are you just being sarcastic?
Granted I'm the furthest thing from making anyone think that....at least I think. I know I don't dress trashy, etc.
Anyway, we all let it go--or so I though. I went to the washroom and I come back and there's no one sitting at the table. Brian comes back, I ask where the other two are. He said they went outside. Ok, I figure whatever, they're arguing because she called him out on something she didn't like that he's not doing, whatever.
She comes back and pulls me aside and starts telling me that she didn't like this comment, etc. Brian had already apologized nicely, so I figured it was dropped. Hell, worse comments than that have flown about me.
She starts telling me how she and her fiance are fighting now because he never sticks up for her
Honestly at that point I could have cared less. I told her flat out, you're being to overly sensitive and honestly what did you want him to do? Turn around and punch Brian? Scream at him? He looked at Brian and Brian realized how stupid it was of a thing to say and he apologized to you.
We go back to the table and I whispered to Brian, "Apologize to her again". He did and asked if there was a problem?
Next thing we know, Rick comes storming in and screams and yells at Brian. Everyone turns and looks at him and he's in Brian's face.
He said, "IF YOU EVER-EVER say something like that again your ass will be mine! Be thankful I'm not knocking your fucking teeth out of your mouth right now!!!!"
I was shocked. My jaw seriously dropped to the floor. I put my hand on Brians leg-1. to keep him sitting down and 2. to let him know I didn't agree with this at all.
My friend starts freaking out on her fiance and is all, "Please, please don't do this, if you love me at all you won't do this". I'm sitting there like......YOU BOTH ARE NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
So her fiance turns around and walks out and asks, "Aren't you coming?!" She said no, sit down, stay with us.
I'm like....screw that, I'm leaving. her fiance turns to leave but not before screaming, "FINE! CHOSE HIM OVER ME LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO!!!"
Now I'm there like....WTF?! The way it was said made it sound like she and my husband had a thing going on. I was pissed at that point. Up till then it was more like I was caught in the middle of all this.
So Brian and I left and he felt like crap. he'd apologized 3 times in all, he'd tried to apologize to her fiance. I didn't want to make him feel worse, but I asked him why he said it. He said it was one of those things that just came out and you thought it would be taken as it was---a joke, and seeing as how they'd joked around the same way toward both of us, earlier in the night....he figured it would be taken as it was meant and not seriously at all.
When we were leaving the resturant, I nearly told her...I dont think I can be in your wedding anymore....but I kept my mouth closed.
They tried calling us 25 times Saturday night. I went to the bookstore to see my brother, where he works, and talk to him.
My brother heard what happened and he told me he feels she over reacted and especially if Brian apologized and because of the comments or "jokes" they've made in the past regarding me, they were being way to oversensitive.
So I finally talk to her fiance last night. I explained that I didn't want to talk to either of them on Saturday night because I didn't want to end up saying something I'd regret. Things ended fine with him, I told him he didn't owe me an apology at all, but I think he and Brian owed each other apologies.
He said he really wanted to talk to Brian, he didn't realize that Brian was trying to apologize to him on Saturday night when he came in.
So today I get an email from my friend.
She said she needed to say some things to get them off her chest. I'm reading this thinking....why are you telling ME this stuff. Talk to your fiance or email my husband if you're still pissed. I seriously was just there when this happened. It wasnt my fault, I didnt instigate it, nothing. But these things she's saying in her email-she was completely attacking me and my marriage.
Saying that I've been beaten down so much by being a wife that I don't know how to be a powerful woman anymore and getting married has taken my identity away from me......I'm seriously reading this email and my blood started boiling.
I wrote her back and told her to get off her high horse and I had no clue why she was attacking my marriage at all. I've not become some wishy washy wife that stands by the way side. I admited that I gave Brian crap about what happened, but if I thought he had said it to be mean or vengful, I would have called him out on it.
I really thought it was just a stupid comment and she was being way to sensitive and over reacting, along with dragging us in to her own problems.
So, part of me feels like saying, screw it, forget their wedding, etc. I'm sick of all their shit and the on again off again crap.
The other part of me just wishes she'd drop this crap, but she keeps emailing me about how she's having these horrible anxiety attacks, etc. She's ALWAYS having anxiety attack. I'm at the point where I'm ready to tell her--GO TO THE DOCTOR if you're really having anxiety about all this shit that you deal with day to day. I can't do anything about it and I'm tired of hearing about it.
UGH!!!!!!!!!!
So ya'll know about the problems she and her on again/off again fiance have.
So we go out to dinner on Saturday night, me, Brian(my husband), her and her fiance and her son.
Alright, so we're laughing and joking around and the sarcasim and jokes start flying. They were poking jokes at me and Brian, and we were giving it right back. No big deal, it was all good fun.
Brian was joking around with Rick and said something along the lines of "Oh, I've not met this beautiful girlfriend of yours".
We all laughed, no big deal. My friend goes crazy a minute later, on her fiance. "Why don't you ever defend me? Why can't you stick up for me??? You NEVER DO and I'm sick of it."
I was sitting there like......whoa, ok we're in a resturant....calm the hell down.
I didn't see how it was a big deal, yeah ok the comment Brian made could have been really mean if it wasn't how we joke around with these particular friends. They've done much worse to me that Brian's not appreciated, totally joking about me being a slut, etc. Yah it stings and it's kind of like....am I really making you think that? or are you just being sarcastic?
Granted I'm the furthest thing from making anyone think that....at least I think. I know I don't dress trashy, etc.
Anyway, we all let it go--or so I though. I went to the washroom and I come back and there's no one sitting at the table. Brian comes back, I ask where the other two are. He said they went outside. Ok, I figure whatever, they're arguing because she called him out on something she didn't like that he's not doing, whatever.
She comes back and pulls me aside and starts telling me that she didn't like this comment, etc. Brian had already apologized nicely, so I figured it was dropped. Hell, worse comments than that have flown about me.
She starts telling me how she and her fiance are fighting now because he never sticks up for her
Honestly at that point I could have cared less. I told her flat out, you're being to overly sensitive and honestly what did you want him to do? Turn around and punch Brian? Scream at him? He looked at Brian and Brian realized how stupid it was of a thing to say and he apologized to you.
We go back to the table and I whispered to Brian, "Apologize to her again". He did and asked if there was a problem?
Next thing we know, Rick comes storming in and screams and yells at Brian. Everyone turns and looks at him and he's in Brian's face.
He said, "IF YOU EVER-EVER say something like that again your ass will be mine! Be thankful I'm not knocking your fucking teeth out of your mouth right now!!!!"
I was shocked. My jaw seriously dropped to the floor. I put my hand on Brians leg-1. to keep him sitting down and 2. to let him know I didn't agree with this at all.
My friend starts freaking out on her fiance and is all, "Please, please don't do this, if you love me at all you won't do this". I'm sitting there like......YOU BOTH ARE NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!
So her fiance turns around and walks out and asks, "Aren't you coming?!" She said no, sit down, stay with us.
I'm like....screw that, I'm leaving. her fiance turns to leave but not before screaming, "FINE! CHOSE HIM OVER ME LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO!!!"
Now I'm there like....WTF?! The way it was said made it sound like she and my husband had a thing going on. I was pissed at that point. Up till then it was more like I was caught in the middle of all this.
So Brian and I left and he felt like crap. he'd apologized 3 times in all, he'd tried to apologize to her fiance. I didn't want to make him feel worse, but I asked him why he said it. He said it was one of those things that just came out and you thought it would be taken as it was---a joke, and seeing as how they'd joked around the same way toward both of us, earlier in the night....he figured it would be taken as it was meant and not seriously at all.
When we were leaving the resturant, I nearly told her...I dont think I can be in your wedding anymore....but I kept my mouth closed.
They tried calling us 25 times Saturday night. I went to the bookstore to see my brother, where he works, and talk to him.
My brother heard what happened and he told me he feels she over reacted and especially if Brian apologized and because of the comments or "jokes" they've made in the past regarding me, they were being way to oversensitive.
So I finally talk to her fiance last night. I explained that I didn't want to talk to either of them on Saturday night because I didn't want to end up saying something I'd regret. Things ended fine with him, I told him he didn't owe me an apology at all, but I think he and Brian owed each other apologies.
He said he really wanted to talk to Brian, he didn't realize that Brian was trying to apologize to him on Saturday night when he came in.
So today I get an email from my friend.
She said she needed to say some things to get them off her chest. I'm reading this thinking....why are you telling ME this stuff. Talk to your fiance or email my husband if you're still pissed. I seriously was just there when this happened. It wasnt my fault, I didnt instigate it, nothing. But these things she's saying in her email-she was completely attacking me and my marriage.
Saying that I've been beaten down so much by being a wife that I don't know how to be a powerful woman anymore and getting married has taken my identity away from me......I'm seriously reading this email and my blood started boiling.
I wrote her back and told her to get off her high horse and I had no clue why she was attacking my marriage at all. I've not become some wishy washy wife that stands by the way side. I admited that I gave Brian crap about what happened, but if I thought he had said it to be mean or vengful, I would have called him out on it.
I really thought it was just a stupid comment and she was being way to sensitive and over reacting, along with dragging us in to her own problems.
So, part of me feels like saying, screw it, forget their wedding, etc. I'm sick of all their shit and the on again off again crap.
The other part of me just wishes she'd drop this crap, but she keeps emailing me about how she's having these horrible anxiety attacks, etc. She's ALWAYS having anxiety attack. I'm at the point where I'm ready to tell her--GO TO THE DOCTOR if you're really having anxiety about all this shit that you deal with day to day. I can't do anything about it and I'm tired of hearing about it.
UGH!!!!!!!!!!