For Honor
Rock n' Roll Doggie VIP PASS
It's the end of the schoolyear, of my school career in high school. But lately, I've been having an unhealthy diet and lifestyle.
For a while now, I haven't been physicall active like I should be, but hopefullly the summer won't be too brutal and I will be able to get outside.
With exception to last night, the past few weeks I've been up late and really badly. When I got home from school, I would just doze of. Wake up at like 7. Eat, do stuff, procrastinate. Often times I would wait until about 12am-1am the morning a project was due to get started. But I think that has to do with being a senior at the end of th eyear, in addition to my personal flaws.
Worse yet, my diet. I don't like to drink much else but water, so that is good. But lately, I've been having potato chip cravings, and icecream is very much a summertime food.
THe thing is, I know when I am not eating right. I can feel it in my teeth, and honestly, I can just feel the difference in how foood tastes. I think I have a very sensative digestion course, too, so all this junk food, well, you can feel it. I think some of it is mental, too.
I'm not really a health nut, but I know I have to be careful, and ge in shape for summer. I plan on working a lot, so I have to get back to a more normal schedual, I suppose. No more insanely late nights, I would imagine....
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(I didn't intend to write this, but it came out anyways)
PS:
a friend I've known for a few years sort of told me something that that caught me offgaurd. It is one of those things that, I don't know, it is just weird timing.
We've had an up and down relationship as friends over the year--- at the beginning of the year, she flirted with me a lot. And we grew closer, I guess we shared some things, life expereinces - I was the first person she told a lot of things that she didn't really talk about wiht anyone else. A while ago, we had a sort of arguement, and apparently I really upset her, but I didn't see how that was possible at the time. At this moment, I really wonder how she has felt about me all a long... But since the mentioned arguement, things have been up and down - - I've been on her "bitch list", because apparently I hurt her a lot during that argument. But I think I've been off for a few weeks now.
This past week, I learned a lot more about her. She has a very layered personality... It is easy to see her as shallow, for her manners and actions can mislead. But she really is a deep person, and her true intents are things I respect. For those she cares about, she cares about a lot, and worries about them. She listed to me a few people she "loved", and she was really sincere in the expression for her care, and she really does not want to loose those people.
The reason I say this is because tonight, after a slight argument that was brought about by both of us being emotionally sensative at that moment, I sent her an email apologizing about things. She is one of those rare people that I can so easily become upset with, and she becomes upset with me easily, yet their is an odd level of concern between us. We are very different people with different perspectives, sort of. Anyway, dhe sent one back and closed it with something like 'there was never a time when we too different to understand each other'. She said some other things, and then ended with 'just wanted to let you know I love you'
It was touching, and in my world, love means a lot. But I believe I won't consider it too seriously here, because I don't know what it means just yet. But I am flattered by it non the less. To me, with the best of my knowledge of her personality, it means i am one of the few people that she really cares about and will miss when we all go our separate ways.
It was an emotional day for her, since it was her last concert ever, and she was seeing a lot of people for the last time like that. So I don't want to take an emotional statement too seriously or anything. But at the same time, perhaps she realized something tonight/
Either way, I will consider it as a good thing, and wait to see what it really means.
I know love comes in many levels and forms, so I will have to see where this all goes. We have such an odd relationship... All I know is that there is no way I can be sure what it means at this moment. Regardless, I care about her a lot, and I suppose I could say the same thing to her, considering the definition I used - about the person being someone you will miss and care about a lot. I don't know.....
I know love has a lot of distinctions, but I really don't know anything about it. But I suppose as a friend, I love her too.But love is a word that I do not like to use....
For a while now, I haven't been physicall active like I should be, but hopefullly the summer won't be too brutal and I will be able to get outside.
With exception to last night, the past few weeks I've been up late and really badly. When I got home from school, I would just doze of. Wake up at like 7. Eat, do stuff, procrastinate. Often times I would wait until about 12am-1am the morning a project was due to get started. But I think that has to do with being a senior at the end of th eyear, in addition to my personal flaws.
Worse yet, my diet. I don't like to drink much else but water, so that is good. But lately, I've been having potato chip cravings, and icecream is very much a summertime food.
THe thing is, I know when I am not eating right. I can feel it in my teeth, and honestly, I can just feel the difference in how foood tastes. I think I have a very sensative digestion course, too, so all this junk food, well, you can feel it. I think some of it is mental, too.
I'm not really a health nut, but I know I have to be careful, and ge in shape for summer. I plan on working a lot, so I have to get back to a more normal schedual, I suppose. No more insanely late nights, I would imagine....
------------------------------------------
(I didn't intend to write this, but it came out anyways)
PS:
a friend I've known for a few years sort of told me something that that caught me offgaurd. It is one of those things that, I don't know, it is just weird timing.
We've had an up and down relationship as friends over the year--- at the beginning of the year, she flirted with me a lot. And we grew closer, I guess we shared some things, life expereinces - I was the first person she told a lot of things that she didn't really talk about wiht anyone else. A while ago, we had a sort of arguement, and apparently I really upset her, but I didn't see how that was possible at the time. At this moment, I really wonder how she has felt about me all a long... But since the mentioned arguement, things have been up and down - - I've been on her "bitch list", because apparently I hurt her a lot during that argument. But I think I've been off for a few weeks now.
This past week, I learned a lot more about her. She has a very layered personality... It is easy to see her as shallow, for her manners and actions can mislead. But she really is a deep person, and her true intents are things I respect. For those she cares about, she cares about a lot, and worries about them. She listed to me a few people she "loved", and she was really sincere in the expression for her care, and she really does not want to loose those people.
The reason I say this is because tonight, after a slight argument that was brought about by both of us being emotionally sensative at that moment, I sent her an email apologizing about things. She is one of those rare people that I can so easily become upset with, and she becomes upset with me easily, yet their is an odd level of concern between us. We are very different people with different perspectives, sort of. Anyway, dhe sent one back and closed it with something like 'there was never a time when we too different to understand each other'. She said some other things, and then ended with 'just wanted to let you know I love you'
It was touching, and in my world, love means a lot. But I believe I won't consider it too seriously here, because I don't know what it means just yet. But I am flattered by it non the less. To me, with the best of my knowledge of her personality, it means i am one of the few people that she really cares about and will miss when we all go our separate ways.
It was an emotional day for her, since it was her last concert ever, and she was seeing a lot of people for the last time like that. So I don't want to take an emotional statement too seriously or anything. But at the same time, perhaps she realized something tonight/
Either way, I will consider it as a good thing, and wait to see what it really means.
I know love comes in many levels and forms, so I will have to see where this all goes. We have such an odd relationship... All I know is that there is no way I can be sure what it means at this moment. Regardless, I care about her a lot, and I suppose I could say the same thing to her, considering the definition I used - about the person being someone you will miss and care about a lot. I don't know.....
I know love has a lot of distinctions, but I really don't know anything about it. But I suppose as a friend, I love her too.But love is a word that I do not like to use....
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mad: )
I've been trying to work on that this summer as well.
