Thoughts and prayers needed

[Liesje]

The father of one of my mom's best friends is in bad shape. First, I should say that it's not only the father of my mom's friend, but their entire extended family are good friends with my extended family. I grew up along side his grandkids. Well, he had a stroke a few weeks ago. He's also had a stroke a few years before and was never quite the same after that. After this second stroke, my mom's friend abruptly flew to AZ to be with her dad. We were all supposed to go on a spring break trip together in two weeks. They called from AZ last week to say that he was not going to die and they were still in on spring break. Now, I feel bad for my parents b/c they were told to make plans and paid for all of the trip, but they feel bad b/c their friends have backed out because the dad is just not improving. Not only that, but his insurance or medicaid or whatever it is told them that as of April 4, they are no longer paying for ANYTHING because he is not improving and according to them, his life is no longer worth their time. Our friends have NO choice but to use their spring break to drive a trailer to AZ, pick up their dad/grandpa, and bring him back in a trailer when he really needs an ambulance to transport him to a more permanent nursing home. They don't even have a rehab place lined up for him yet. Every place is either full, or they can't afford because the insurance is done on April 4. I've known this man my entire life and he was almost like a distant third grandpa to me. He's not improving at all and his brain was damaged so that his speech, vision, and comprehension have all been affected.

I feel terrible for him for having to endure this again. I feel terrible for our friends for having the stress of the insurance cutting off and not having any ideas what to do with their dad. I also feel terrible for them because they feel terrible for us for canceling last minute, when obviously we would never hold something like this against them. I feel terrible that a sick old man has to ride for 30 hours in a trailer because insurance has decided that his life is not worth caring about anymore.

 

[BonosBaby12]

Im so sorry Lies All of you are in my prayers and thoughts ray:

You just gotta love those good old insurance companies! Nice to see just how uncaring and coldhearted they really are. I am absolutely appalled by their attitude! Is there anyway that this decision can be fought?

 

[Liesje]

Im so sorry Lies All of you are in my prayers and thoughts ray:

You just gotta love those good old insurance companies! Nice to see just how uncaring and coldhearted they really are. I am absolutely appalled by their attitude! Is there anyway that this decision can be fought?

Thanks, Shannon.

The way we understood it was that he was admitted on March 4 and the insurance company stops paying after one month if the patient does not improve. It's been almost a month, and he's not getting worse, but he's not getting better. The man has had two major strokes! Of course his brain is going to be damaged and may never recover, but it's not like he's a vegetable. I don't understand what the health sector expects people to do...

 

[BonosBaby12]

You are very welcome

Ok I would just love to know who the hell ever came up with that brilliant idea! Guess they believe this poor man is just going to suddenly recover at the snap of the fingers. Completely outrageous that ANYONE should be cut off from health insurance like that. He's clearly in need of further assistance with his condition. Sure his family wishes that he could become well again with just the snap of their fingers.

My mom has encounterd some real winners during the course of my father's failing health. However she has thankfully never encountered something like this. I am just absolutely stunned by their way of thinking

 

[Liesje]

Sure his family wishes that he could become well again with just the snap of their fingers.

Exactly. The family would be more than happy to help, but they run their own business building houses and I imagine they get really short on cash during the winter since they can't build much, plus their son has kidney failure and has needed years of dialysis and two kidney replacements, and their daughter who is my age has a little girl so they are supporting them.

I have this terrible feeling their "spring break" is going to end up like Little Miss Sunshine, and not in the good way.

Everyone wants to help, but short of raising hundreds of thousands of dollars, there's nothing anyone can do.

 

[VertigoGal]

I'm sorry Lies. Your friend, his family, and all of you are in my thoughts.

The insurance company's policy is disgusting. I don't really have anything to add there, but it's disturbing to me that he won't even receive adequate and safe transportation once he's been kicked out of the hospital essentially. There's something wrong about the family having to transport a stroke victim home in a trailer.

 

[JCOSTER]

ray: ray: and

Sorry, insurance is so unfair at times.

 

[shari schultz]

prayers will be said.

Insurance is soooo maddening!
Not knowing insurance rules too well in this situation.........Is he stable enough that he could be transported back to his family before the insurance company ends coverage? *knife in insurance companys back and twist*

 

[Liesje]

Is he stable enough that he could be transported back to his family before the insurance company ends coverage? *knife in insurance companys back and twist*

No, he cannot fly. He can only sit up for a few minutes at a time and is still being spoon-fed. They cannot pay for an ambulance transport of over 2000 miles, which is why they are going with their trailer.

I'd almost rather not go on spring break now. We're all going to be worried sick knowing what is going on while we are alone in this beach house attempting to relax. But, my mom already paid and it's non-refundable so we're going to make the best of it.

 

[U2Girl1978]

I'm so sorry Lies. I will be sending ray: to them.

The insurance companies are appalling these days.

 

[redhotswami]

Sorry to hear this, Lies. I just get sick when I think of how companies gauge our lives these days, to decide which ones are worth it and which aren't. I will ray:

 

[U2Girl416]

I'm sorry Lies. it seems insurance companies are full of sunshine and smiles until you actually need to use them, then they get to pick and choose who's worth it and how much they're worth. and the worse alternative is to be without insurance at all.

hugs and prayers being sent your way ray:

 

[Liesje]

Update: He's made improvements this past week. He walked 50 feet, rested, and walked 50 feet back. Our friends ARE coming with us!! They found a rich friend with a private jet and asked him if he could fly down and fly their dad/grandpa back and he said yes. However, the Dr. said he cannot fly because of their is still pressure in his brain. One of their cousins took the trailer down to get him and is already en route. They also found a nursing home for him to stay until he can enter a rehab facility. Since things have fallen into place and he's slowly making progress, at this point they will be joining us.

The insurance company can still fuck off and die

 

[Lila64]

I didn't see this thread til today. Is there any way the friends can consult an attorney to find out if the insurance company is acting in a legal fashion and/or if they can continue their coverage?

I agree with you about insurance companies

 

[coemgen]

Lies, I'm so sorry to hear about this. It's total crap. Insurance companies, unfortunately, are just about numbers. It'd be nice to see one with a heart sometime.

I'm glad to read he's improving and that things are unfolding as far as a place to stay and for the trip. Hopefully the stress level will go down as much as possible with these updates.

I'm definitely going to pray for this man and his family. They seem like a good, strong family. Please continue to keep us posted on how they're doing and how we can pray.

Have a safe trip, too.

God bless,

coemgen

 

[redhotswami]

I'm glad he is recovering!!! And glad to see your friends are coming too.

 

[Liesje]

*bump*

Well, Merle did make it back from AZ in the trailer and was making progress here. He was at home with his wife and family who were taking care of rehab and still looking into nursing home arrangements or a home care nurse.

He died this week. He got another blood clot that moved into his abdomen and ruptured something, hence the stomach sickness.

It's very sad because he was doing so well, but on the other hand, it's almost a relief because even after his stroke years ago, he was never the same and never seemed happy like he used to be. He got to go home and be with his family, he was walking around, eating better, talking to people, etc. so I hope that gives his family peace. It's never "good" when someone dies, but I think he was ready and he's happy in a better place.

 

[Lila64]

 

[YBORCITY]

ray:

 

[redhotswami]

oh wow.

 

[cell]

 

[tiny dancer]

 

[U2Girl416]

 

[cruzila]

!!

 

[BonosBaby12]

Im sorry Lies