Horrible?..... A HORRIBLE GIRL??? WTF is wrong with you? I'm going to kick your ass!! YOU ARE AWESOME AND YOU KNOW IT!!! You just need to get out there and kick some serious ass!
Don't paint men as some great unattainable conquest and yourself as someone that's unable to measure up. I think your problem is the fact that deep down inside you KNOW that there are not many men out there that deserve you, but you keep believing the opposite. So you have to wait a little bit to find the right one. So what? Why would high standards make you "pathetic"? To the contrary, it makes you someone that all of us can look to with dignity, respect and hope.
Like I always say, don't ever settle for second best just to avoid being alone. I think you are an example of someone who refuses to put up with a man that doesn't deserve you. I know many people who are extremely miserable because they are stuck in a relationship with a person that is completely wrong for them, just to avoid being alone. Think about how "horrible" that would and can be. CELEBRATE the reality that you are strong enough to NOT be in a relationship that you don't want to be in!
Enjoy your freedom to pick and choose who YOU want. Enjoy the fact that you are free to BE YOURSELF. Enjoy the time you have to decide what is best for you in the long run.
It takes a lot of courage and strength to not compromise your values and goals. Don't ever be ashamed of waiting for the right one. You really need to snap out of any lies that you're believing and accepting. Society wants to paint this picture that you have not "arrived" until you're married or found that special someone. Give me a break!!! I'm now 32 years old and have been through many relationships and heartbreaks. I wouldn't change it for anything. So I'm still single. So what? I think most people are jealous of the fact that I still have that freedom.
Let me tell you one last thing though. I've almost settled for second best on several occasions in my life. I've even been engaged twice! What I thought was going to be the best for me at the time, turned out to be the worst possible situation for me. Reason being, you never know who you're going to meet. As you get older, you start to panic. You start to think about settling. Thank God they never worked out! But now, after all these years I've found someone that has changed my entire outlook on life. She is the most incredible woman that I have ever met. The perfect fit for me. I am completely free to be myself without conditions, but let me tell ya', it came through a long road of much grief, pain and tears over the coarse of many years. My point is this. I am now having the most incredibly awesome experience of my life, but it could have never happened if I had settled or given up. She put it perfectly, " The right one is out there for you. Its just a matter of how long you have to wait."
SO BE CAREFUL!! DON'T SETTLE OR BE ASHAMED OF WAITING!!!
NOW GET OUT THERE AND KICK SOME ASS!!! YOU ARE AWESOME AND YOU KNOW IT!!!
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Day and night
Why is it so
That this longing for you follows wherever I go
In the roaring traffic gloom
In the silence of my lonely room
I think of you
Night and day