Valoria
The Fly
Hi everyone,
I am rather new to these forums, and since I've read some wonderful responses to other "zoo confessionals" posted in this space, I thought I'd share a recent (well, today, in fact) issue that is rather troubling to me:
Today, I got my first job performance review. I work part-time (about 15 hours per week, with extra hours here and there) at my local public library. I have worked there 3 years, and started there at about the same time the lady working my job was promoted to library director. Everyone seemed very nice--we are a small library and serve a community of about 5,000 people.
I am the youngest person that works there (33). My director is about 50 and everyone else is about 55 to mid-70s. For many who I work with, the library is their post-retirement "keep-me-busy" type of job. I get paid minimum wage, no benefits. I have a bachelor's degree in English but no library degree, not that I would need it for this job anyway, but I'd still like to get it eventually.
Anyway, to the performance review; It was generally positive but very vague in the less-than-complimentary parts. My boss, with whom I hardly interact during my hours at the library (I work evenings and she is mostly gone by then, and she's gone all day Saturdays) wrote that she wasn't sure how "comfortable" I was with the multi-tasking, flexibility and organization aspects of working at a public library. There were no examples given, just an assumption. I can't for the life of me think of how I am not comfortable with these things, which really seem to encompass the entrity of working at any job, really. There was also a note that said I was only "average" in being a team player and cooperating with co-workers, though my boss did acknowledge that I subbed for people often. She said I need to be more flexible in getting Saturdays off during major holidays; and that 2 years ago had been a problem but last year was better. Needless to say, I wasn't aware of any of this when it was happening, or I would have given up one of my extended family get-togethers if I needed to. As it is, I work Saturdays throughout the rest of the year, and the one time I do want Saturdays off and it's a problem...go figure! She also said I needed to be more flexible with lunch and supper hours (as far as I know, I have never been anything but accomodating in this regard--truthfully, who takes lunch and supper when has never been of much concern to me, as long as we get it in).
Additionally, since I rarely interact with my boss much, I have a distinct feeling that one co-worker in particular is feeding her all of this "constructive criticism." This lady is the children's librarian and has worked there well over 20 years, longer than anyone else currently employed there. She has a rather dry, somewhat anti-social personality and has had run-ins with other co-workers (one even refused to work with her on a project). She's never been outright hostile to me but she's been sneakily vindictive in the past; she has repeatedly left tons of extra work she should have completed herself in my mailbox (and never anyone else's) with the presumption that, since I was lowest on the totem pole, I would do it (and i did). Once, she went behind my back to the boss and complained I hadn't helped sufficiently with closing duties (which I didn't recall doing incorrectly) and my boss left a note saying she had to talk to me about it, but never did (karma: The next time I worked with this lady, she actually forgot to do the closing duties downstairs, her turf, because she hadn't been paying attention to the time! Go figure!).
This lady will act nice to me when she sees me, but given her history, I wouldn't be surprised if she finds some reason or another to go to the boss with a complaint about me, which is ironic because she spends most of her time hiding down in her little office in the children's department and not even helping me with patrons upstairs when we do work together! One time, I mentioned to her that I was interesting in getting a master's degree, and she immediately came back with, "I'm not retiring anytime soon!" to which I reassured her I didn't want to be a children's librarian. My husband wonders if she perhaps feels threatened by me, being 'new blood' and the fact that I am ambitious and want to get an advanced degree, and maybe because she might feel this way she is trying to undermine my abilities by talking to the boss (it should be noted that I have never complained to my boss about any of my co-workers).
Sorry for the long rant. I guess what bothers me the most is that, in the 3 years prior to this performance evaluation, no one came to me directly, addressed any of these potential concerns with me, and gave me a chance to improve on any problem areas. Instead, someone snuck behind my back, without confronting me (apparently repeatedly) and now I am worried about being a source of bad will with this person and worry about what my boss might think of me. Does anyone have any thoughts on how I might proceed? I am meeting with my boss sometime next week; I want to be tactful with my concerns and not accuse anyone of anything, despite the theories I have expressed here. At the same time, I don't want to just take some of these accusations lying down, because it's not as though a library desk job is so difficult to start with, and I am rather annoyed that this review makes it sound like I am incompetent in something a high school student could do.
Maybe I'm paranoid, but I really think there is someone driving this whole thing, and I know it's not my boss because she is very pleasant to me and rarely sees me during working hours as it is. At least one of my other-coworkers who has run-ins with this lady in the past has expressed disgust to me about how she dumps her excess work in my mailbox, exclusively, so I don't think he's in on it.
Sorry, just needed to rant...any thoughts/advice would be appreciated!
I am rather new to these forums, and since I've read some wonderful responses to other "zoo confessionals" posted in this space, I thought I'd share a recent (well, today, in fact) issue that is rather troubling to me:
Today, I got my first job performance review. I work part-time (about 15 hours per week, with extra hours here and there) at my local public library. I have worked there 3 years, and started there at about the same time the lady working my job was promoted to library director. Everyone seemed very nice--we are a small library and serve a community of about 5,000 people.
I am the youngest person that works there (33). My director is about 50 and everyone else is about 55 to mid-70s. For many who I work with, the library is their post-retirement "keep-me-busy" type of job. I get paid minimum wage, no benefits. I have a bachelor's degree in English but no library degree, not that I would need it for this job anyway, but I'd still like to get it eventually.
Anyway, to the performance review; It was generally positive but very vague in the less-than-complimentary parts. My boss, with whom I hardly interact during my hours at the library (I work evenings and she is mostly gone by then, and she's gone all day Saturdays) wrote that she wasn't sure how "comfortable" I was with the multi-tasking, flexibility and organization aspects of working at a public library. There were no examples given, just an assumption. I can't for the life of me think of how I am not comfortable with these things, which really seem to encompass the entrity of working at any job, really. There was also a note that said I was only "average" in being a team player and cooperating with co-workers, though my boss did acknowledge that I subbed for people often. She said I need to be more flexible in getting Saturdays off during major holidays; and that 2 years ago had been a problem but last year was better. Needless to say, I wasn't aware of any of this when it was happening, or I would have given up one of my extended family get-togethers if I needed to. As it is, I work Saturdays throughout the rest of the year, and the one time I do want Saturdays off and it's a problem...go figure! She also said I needed to be more flexible with lunch and supper hours (as far as I know, I have never been anything but accomodating in this regard--truthfully, who takes lunch and supper when has never been of much concern to me, as long as we get it in).
Additionally, since I rarely interact with my boss much, I have a distinct feeling that one co-worker in particular is feeding her all of this "constructive criticism." This lady is the children's librarian and has worked there well over 20 years, longer than anyone else currently employed there. She has a rather dry, somewhat anti-social personality and has had run-ins with other co-workers (one even refused to work with her on a project). She's never been outright hostile to me but she's been sneakily vindictive in the past; she has repeatedly left tons of extra work she should have completed herself in my mailbox (and never anyone else's) with the presumption that, since I was lowest on the totem pole, I would do it (and i did). Once, she went behind my back to the boss and complained I hadn't helped sufficiently with closing duties (which I didn't recall doing incorrectly) and my boss left a note saying she had to talk to me about it, but never did (karma: The next time I worked with this lady, she actually forgot to do the closing duties downstairs, her turf, because she hadn't been paying attention to the time! Go figure!).
This lady will act nice to me when she sees me, but given her history, I wouldn't be surprised if she finds some reason or another to go to the boss with a complaint about me, which is ironic because she spends most of her time hiding down in her little office in the children's department and not even helping me with patrons upstairs when we do work together! One time, I mentioned to her that I was interesting in getting a master's degree, and she immediately came back with, "I'm not retiring anytime soon!" to which I reassured her I didn't want to be a children's librarian. My husband wonders if she perhaps feels threatened by me, being 'new blood' and the fact that I am ambitious and want to get an advanced degree, and maybe because she might feel this way she is trying to undermine my abilities by talking to the boss (it should be noted that I have never complained to my boss about any of my co-workers).
Sorry for the long rant. I guess what bothers me the most is that, in the 3 years prior to this performance evaluation, no one came to me directly, addressed any of these potential concerns with me, and gave me a chance to improve on any problem areas. Instead, someone snuck behind my back, without confronting me (apparently repeatedly) and now I am worried about being a source of bad will with this person and worry about what my boss might think of me. Does anyone have any thoughts on how I might proceed? I am meeting with my boss sometime next week; I want to be tactful with my concerns and not accuse anyone of anything, despite the theories I have expressed here. At the same time, I don't want to just take some of these accusations lying down, because it's not as though a library desk job is so difficult to start with, and I am rather annoyed that this review makes it sound like I am incompetent in something a high school student could do.
Maybe I'm paranoid, but I really think there is someone driving this whole thing, and I know it's not my boss because she is very pleasant to me and rarely sees me during working hours as it is. At least one of my other-coworkers who has run-ins with this lady in the past has expressed disgust to me about how she dumps her excess work in my mailbox, exclusively, so I don't think he's in on it.
Sorry, just needed to rant...any thoughts/advice would be appreciated!
