Please help me.

[Bonogirl777]

My friend Janae is the funniest and possibly the weirdest person you will ever meet. But I have a problem. She's been a depressed wreck ever since about..oh, 4 months ago at the most. It's a long story but her boyfriend (the object of most girls desire at school) had to move away to the very top of the state. Me and my friend, who is also best friends with Janae, had the hugest crush on him even when he was hers. He was also one of my best friends. Don't worry. I've gotten over him. It turns out that he's the biggest jerk in the world. He doesn't talk to me or Desiray (the friend who had a crush on him too) anymore and he promised he'd be down her on vacation two times. NEVER has he kept his word on it.

But back to Janae. She also has some problems at home too. Her parents seem really nice to me but I don't know what happens when I'm not there.

She is suicidal.

She was very slowly getting better but something her parents did...or didn't do...is making her all depressed again. She says she feels like "a worthless piece of scum".

I just don't want her to feel any pain anymore. It was starting to bring me down too but I didn't let her problems get the best of me.

I'm just really worried and I don't know what to do. Please give me some advice on what to say to her to make her understand that I care about her. I'm out of ideas.

 

[cobl04]

Kind of in the same boat... but it's nowhere near that drastic. Have you spoken to teachers and stuff??? Counsellors. If she is suicidal, I'd stop at nothing.

so sorry to hear this too..

 

[Bonogirl777]

Well, she's been going to the school counselor and I keep telling her that that just isn't enough for her kind of situation.

She hates counselors anyways. She keeps saying that they don't even care about her problems.

And thanks COBL_04.

 

[Total U2 Nut]

Maybe you could get her to go see her local doctor and they could refer her to a specialist in this specific field - I'm sure they'd be able to empathise more and maybe get to the root cause. Good on you for wanting to care for your friend, I can totally understand where you're coming from

 

[Laura M]

If she feels it's helpful to talk to someone but isn't comfortable talking to the counsellor at school can she see someone else? Perhaps she could go to her doctor? If the school are already involved it's likely that her teachers are aware she might be having problems at home already.

You're obviously a very caring and thoughtful friend but she needs to want to find a way to try and deal with her problems that's suitable for her. It's hard to know what's right for someone else when you don't know the full story and everyone deals with things so differently. You can support and advise your friend but you can't tell her what's right for her. I'm sorry I can't give you any better advice.

 

[BonosBaby12]

I would see if you could get her to see a doctor. They would be able to help her a lot more with her depression then the counselor can. You are a great friend for wanting to help her out Hopefully seeing that seeing at least one friend cares proves to be even a little bit of support for her.

 

[JCOSTER]

Does your friend have a favorite teacher or a good relationship with one? Maybe you should talk to one of them.

Its a tremendous responsibility for you to take this on all yourself. You need to get someone to help you help her.

 

[beegee]

If your friend is talking about suicide you need to talk to her parents immediately.

 

[BonoIsMyMuse]

If you feel like her parents might be part of the problem, I suggest talking to a trusted teacher, your own parents, or the counselor at school. Guidance counselors aren't always especially helpful, but if he or she understands the gravity of the situation, hopefully he or she can refer your friend to someone who can help.

Please don't wait to talk to someone. You're being a great friend by being concerned, but this isn't something you can handle yourself. Your friend is starting to take the steps to help herself, but maybe she needs someone to guide her toward the doctor or counselor who can truly help her address her problems.

 

[cobl04]

Well, she's been going to the school counselor and I keep telling her that that just isn't enough for her kind of situation.

She hates counselors anyways. She keeps saying that they don't even care about her problems.

And thanks COBL_04.

No worries I hope it all works out for you and your friend.

I'll echo beegee to and say speak to her parents.

 

[Bonogirl777]

Ok. I'll try and speak to her parents somehow.

 

[Caroni]

I don´t think that talk to her parents is the best thing ever if you suspect they are part of the problem, she is the one who have to talk to them.


I guess all you can do is listen to her and do things to make her feel worthy and loved like writing a little letter or something and maybe look for professional advice since we can say 1000000000 things and none of them is right

 

[Bonogirl777]