Our Father Needs Your Prayers

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Mr. BAW said:
We're going to Palm Springs this weekend; an unplanned getaway just to clear our minds of a lot....we're gonna visit Dad; I spoke with him via cellphone tonight,,,his wife held his phone to his ear and told him to say "hello to Ricardo''''....he knew better, he yelled "Hi son; where have you been?"

I'll spend some jeweled time with him this weekend...:heart: Any messages from anyone???? :)


I am gald to see that you are taking care of yourselves as well. I know, from what I went through with both of my parents. Thoughts and prayers are still with you. :hug:
 
We actually worked a relaxing weekend into a visit with my Father. We decided to stay at an off-the beaten-track hotel and for anyone who wants a referral to a quiet place, check out the Shadow Mountain Resort and Tennis Club....so nice, privacy at its best...we spent Friday afternoon basking in the sun by the pool, we and about 4 others!!! private to the max...

I decided that instead of seeing Dad on Friday, I would spent that evening giving BAW and give myself a headstart on the weekend, we relaxed, had a nice dinner and we actually bedded early for what was to come....my Dad's wife wanted to talk money; she needs help financially...I have no problem with that, its convincing my siblings that they should help that is the real problem...

Saturday morning, I visited Dad alone; I took the time to catch up and it was a nice visit...its expected to expect the unexpected with him; for the first 15 minutes, he called me Mike...???,,,we have no Mike in the family but I just went along with it...I finally rolled him out to the grounds and he asked if i could just "wheel me out of this hell, you have no idea what goes on here...." Does he mean it? is it the dementia? is he merely just forgetting what's going on?

I was able to roll him to the back patio and I mentioned a haircut...he's looked a little shabby and I had the scissors and comb with me...its funny; it was when I was a teenager that I saw my father giving my grandfather a haircut, and I wondered to myself back in my teens,,,,"will I ever HAVE to do that?" Well, I answered my own question.."Yes!" On Saturday morning, I trimmed my Dad down on all sides and by all accounts, he looked pretty darn good!! :up:

I left Dad after an hour and a half; I called his wife and told her that we would be back Saturday evening to discuss her issues...BAW and I went back to the nursing home where the topic of money came up...its something that we siblings will have to talk about even further before deciding what to do...it has to do with his portion of Hospice care..its not free; my Dad makes too much cash through his retirement and social security dispursements...

I learned that during the prior week that my Father had apparently given a speech to the other patients, ala Arnold Schwarzeneger...he apparently had everyone's attention in the main hallway; I learned that he told his wife that he wanted her to take her granddaughter home (she's 9) and asked her to come back alone so they could "do it!"...I learned that he asked the evening nurse for a shot of "something to hoist (it) up!!!"

The fact is, Dad is losing weight, he's eating a minimal amount to keep himself going; he's alert but he plays it off like he's not! He has become a focus point of all the nurses who have been warned to watch out for him!

All, in all, he looks like he did several weeks ago; his humor is there and so is his want for the female companion....I will write more in the next day or so but in the meantime, he is still with us and I can't NOT believe that your prayers and good thoughts are being addressed...:heart: The BAW's and family
 
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An update regarding our father...today was his 89th Birthday... I'm so glad that I was able to share this day with him although he was non-communicative but far from being non-demonstrative. Let me explain....

My father lives in the Palm Springs area, Thousand Palms to be exact; many of his neighbors in this desert area are snowbirds, persons who live in Canada or other colder parts that flock to the Palm Springs area during "their cold months". Such was the case today....I was met by Peter, down from Alaska to spend the winter and spring.

I found Dad in his wheelchair falling asleep, not unusual because he sleeps quite a bit. He is weakened, he is diminished and essentially non-verbal. His eye contact is sometimes catatonic but he does make his presence known.

Peter and another neighbor, Jerry, had not seen Dad since his illness and move to the nursing home. Peter walked in and began reminiscing about the good old days and Dad moved...he moved quite a bit, matter of fact, I saw the biggest smile imaginable...Dad then told me, clearly and without doubt, "go get us a case of beer, she (the wife) can't carry it alone!"

Peter asked if he could have a beer and we believed that it wouldn''t hurt....he ran to his home and returned with a 6-pack of Miller Lite....he popped one for himself, Jerry and one for Dad....Dad was able to sip from his 12 oz'r and he again smiled...the two men talked about the past few years and Dad was seen to nod in agreement on several occassions..his retention and recognition of what was going on was amazing.

The wife had a Birthday cake for Dad. Unfortunately, the baker thought Dad was 69 years old but the cake was nice just as it was...he ate a piece of cake, he grew tired and fell asleep.

Dad is slipping from us and I really don't know how long his strength will hold out...his doctor saw him this past weekend and the good news is that is lungs are clear, his heart is strong but the presence of leukemia remains. I took a few photos with his wife's camera, I'll try to get those next time I'm out...

I'll never grow tired of looking at his smile. During my childhood and teen yearss, he was a hard-ass to me but it was well worth it.

I'm not afraid of hard work; I can pull weeds with my bare hands, I'm not afraid to get my clothes dirty, I'm not shy about saying what I feel...I'd like to think that I have inherited some of those traits from him...I'm sure my own children think so as well.

Thank you for your continued prayers and kind thoughts on this, my father's 89th birthday.....:hug: :|
 
We saw him yesterday and as soon as I looked at him I knew it was time. He is so tiny and frail..it was hard to look at him without tearing up. He was in a deep sleep and didn't respond to Rick's voice or touch at all. The nurses said he woke up briefly this morning but refused to eat and slipped into a coma a few hours later.

He's fought so long and hard and now I think he's just waiting for someone to tell him its okay to go. :sad:
 
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