A_Wanderer
ONE love, blood, life
I've thought over every permutation and I have a pretty fair idea of what to do but some input from, unbiased, sources could be useful.
Situation basically one of a strong fondness to a girl, victim of bad timing and overthinking (surprise), played my cards close to my chest for a year and finally told her exactly how I felt when neither of us would have to deal with being around eachother. So tack another ten months or so on top of that in solitude (the good kind) and i've basically gained the independence and self-respect that are prerequisites to any emotional entanglements.
I'm fine with that, there are a couple of months next year when our paths cross but thats all a blank slate and between intelligence, charm and not being a creep it could play out alright; but if I don't feel anything towards her or she's involved with someone then thats fine too since i've got everything setup and ready to go.
So got concert tickets, line of thinking is that if I was to go out of my way to find said girl, talk, charm and if the situation allowed ask her out to concert then it would be a flop; I mean were strangers to eachother, as strongly as I may have felt and quite possibly still feel thats all just interactions in my brain and the moment was lost quite a while ago - that isn't mutually exclusive to doing it properly next year but from where I am sitting it doesn't seem to be the right thing to do.
The flipside of this is that I need someone to go with, I am leaning towards a girl who I suspect has a thing for me - smiles, conversations, personal stuff and half a dozen cues in body language that it's fun to pick up on - but asking her out for a not-a-date if you will, if I ask her out on a date then it implies that I am interested, it demands that emotional level which is pretty hard to fake. If I just take her out to a show and coffee then thats not expected, no pressure, which is more comfortable - and that plays in my favour if there was any clicking.
Firstly any input on the course of action is appreciated, since i'm biased and human behaviour is pretty fuzzy; it probably won't change my mind but things to think about are good.
Secondly i'm thinking two steps ahead for all these possibilities, I don't imagine any of these potentialities lasting to long, love fades and situations change, it's just a new round.
Thirdly, while it may seem that I am some sort of a computer this is basically the product of thinking through what needs to be done over and over, I feel but thats a matter between me and possibly someone I trust, there are much more interesting things in the world than people - so if im interested in a person then they must be really interesting.
Situation basically one of a strong fondness to a girl, victim of bad timing and overthinking (surprise), played my cards close to my chest for a year and finally told her exactly how I felt when neither of us would have to deal with being around eachother. So tack another ten months or so on top of that in solitude (the good kind) and i've basically gained the independence and self-respect that are prerequisites to any emotional entanglements.
I'm fine with that, there are a couple of months next year when our paths cross but thats all a blank slate and between intelligence, charm and not being a creep it could play out alright; but if I don't feel anything towards her or she's involved with someone then thats fine too since i've got everything setup and ready to go.
So got concert tickets, line of thinking is that if I was to go out of my way to find said girl, talk, charm and if the situation allowed ask her out to concert then it would be a flop; I mean were strangers to eachother, as strongly as I may have felt and quite possibly still feel thats all just interactions in my brain and the moment was lost quite a while ago - that isn't mutually exclusive to doing it properly next year but from where I am sitting it doesn't seem to be the right thing to do.
The flipside of this is that I need someone to go with, I am leaning towards a girl who I suspect has a thing for me - smiles, conversations, personal stuff and half a dozen cues in body language that it's fun to pick up on - but asking her out for a not-a-date if you will, if I ask her out on a date then it implies that I am interested, it demands that emotional level which is pretty hard to fake. If I just take her out to a show and coffee then thats not expected, no pressure, which is more comfortable - and that plays in my favour if there was any clicking.
Firstly any input on the course of action is appreciated, since i'm biased and human behaviour is pretty fuzzy; it probably won't change my mind but things to think about are good.
Secondly i'm thinking two steps ahead for all these possibilities, I don't imagine any of these potentialities lasting to long, love fades and situations change, it's just a new round.
Thirdly, while it may seem that I am some sort of a computer this is basically the product of thinking through what needs to be done over and over, I feel but thats a matter between me and possibly someone I trust, there are much more interesting things in the world than people - so if im interested in a person then they must be really interesting.
and read into coffee and a show as you liking her a lot, esp. if she has been consciously sending you signals. She may think that you have finally picked up on them and are responding positively. It might be quite upsetting for her to go to said concert etc. etc. and then have you not be interested...so more harm and foul than was intended.
