girlhappy said:
He is a gay, right? i have some male friends who are gay. I am not saying they are all the same, because i must tell you i had the very same experience with a lot of my female friends. I dont know what is this...I have always thought the more you love, the more you live...meaning...Love is not selfish thing.I t is about giving. So, in my opinion, the people (our "friends) dont have a clear picture about love. They think they should grab it and keep it for themselves...because of the fear of losing it. It is quite opposite. I think the more you really love you are more willing to give and SHARE. Love is about sharing, right? I can tell you, a lot of my love nad care didnt come back to me.But i dont regret it.
I also feel like I give a lot, but a lot of the time it's not given back to me. I don't know if my "friends" aren't grabbing and keeping my love, or if they are and just not reciprocating. For awhile now I've been very left in the dark about where my relationships stand...
I guess I'll tell you a little about my experiences. When I was younger (i.e. elementary and jr. high) I had a LOT of friends. And I valued friendship more than anything. I couldn't imagine life without my huge group of friends. But things have changed now. We've grown up and sort of grown apart. Now I don't really know where I fit in. I have different groups of friends. I have my band friends, I have my winterguard/colorguard friends, I have my 'school' friends (meaning, I'm friends with them because I have classes with them), I have my friends that I've known for what seems like forever,
. But I think there's a big problem. I am "friends" with so many groups of people, but because of that I'm not an essential part of any group. For example, I sit with my winterguard friends at lunch, but I usually feel on the outside. The only thing I have in common with them is that we practice together for 6 hours a week. They go off and do their own stuff, like shopping and going out to eat, without me. It's like that with every group. It seems that the groups are bonding with each other, but I'm out of the loop. So now, I'm not really sure who I'm friends with. I feel like a tag-along. And I feel like I don't even have a social life anymore, because everybody does stuff without me. So, I'm not sure if they just hang around me because they feel sorry for me, or because they actually value my frienship. In this sense, I definitely feel like I'm giving away and not getting anything back.
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How do you mean you dont remeber? Vertigo didnt impress me exept for hearing Electric Co. but still...
I can't really explain. I guess the only other way I can try to explain it is relating it to being drunk. Now, of course, I've never been drunk, but I'm just trying to get my point across. I just can't remember exactly what happened that night. Like, when I printed off the setlist the next day, I didn't remember that a couple of songs were played. Things like that. I hope that "being drunk" analogy sort of helps...