I've lost my way

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Irisred

The Fly
Joined
Aug 16, 2003
Messages
60
Ok, I don't really know where to start with this as I haven't quite managed to get my head around it yet. Until a few months ago I was quite happy getting on with my life, not jumping around, laughing happy, but not unhappy enough to make any major life changes. I've been married for 19 years, have 2 kids, nice home, etc. Then I met someone who totally blew my mind and now he's gone, I don't know how to find him and I'm lost. Nothing ever happenned between us we just spent a lot of time together talking, but right from the start I felt comfortable with him, like I'd known him for years and I could tell him anything. I've never felt this way about any other man before, even my husband (which is something I feel guilty as hell about). Anyway, I know that I should just move on, try to forget, but I can't. I have to keep myself busy and around people all the time as when I'm alone, I start to think, and before I know it I'm in floods of tears, I haven't cried so much in years. There are songs I can't listen to anymore without getting upset, this man is my first thought when I wake and my last thought before I sleep. I am a very strong person, when I decide to do something I always do it, but I can't do this. I recently told a close friend about this as she has gone through the same thing, her advice was to just go with the flow, see what happens, he might come back, he might not. But I don't know how long can I cope with feeling like this, I'm not used to not being in control. :sad:
 
I wish I could give you advice or something but i'm too young to have any of that sort of experience. So instead, I give you a BIIIIIG :hug: and a :kiss: . I hope life gets better for you!!!
 
You haven't lost your way; we're human, you were merely sidetracked...I see a flood of emotion waiting for the dam to burst..my advice is to handle it before it handles you ...best wishes....
 
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Thanks everyone. Mr BAW, your words are very wise, thankyou, :hug: I know that I've got to accept these feelings instead of pushing them away, I think I'm going to have to live with them for a long time yet. I still wish and hope for him to come back, I know I shouldn't, but thats how it is and the guilt of feeling that way is hard, but I know I will be ok. Thanks again. :)
 
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