I feel a little bit like a loser.

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martha

Blue Crack Supplier
Joined
Mar 30, 2001
Messages
42,544
Location
Orange County and all over the goddamn place
I know I'm not, but it feels that way. I finally decided to give up on pursuing my master's degree in education. Almost all the people around me are starting to work on graduate school, and now I won't be.

I want a master's degree in something, but not education. I work too hard as it is, and I don't need a graduate degree for any money or extra perks; my district pays for hours beyond the bachelor's, not a specific degree. I'm already all the way over on the pay scale, so I wasn't doing it for the money. I was doing for the education I thought I would get. Problem was, I don't really want that kind of education. Sure, I like learning about educational theory; it really does make me a better teacher, but I just can't work that hard right now. A master's in education means doing schoolwork all weekend and almost every evening. I need some Martha time. If I start thinking of school and students all the time, I'll go nuts. I tried it, and it didn't work. I can study the educational theory that interests me independently.

So, I'm whining, I know; but I need to whine to someone. I think I'm going to take the music lessons I've been putting off. My husband will go off to Las Vegas for graduate school next fall (see what I mean!), so I'll have some extra time. I've always wanted to learn to play the cello, which will be daunting, since I have NO ear for music! But I think that will be more fulfilling and relaxing that schoolwork 24/7.

Which will probably make me a better teacher in the long run. :wink:

Thanks for your ear.
 
:) Sounds reasonable to me. You need to know when enough is enough. If you want to do your masters down the road, then go for it. But I agree with daisybean. Martha time is good.
We need to learn to take more time for ourselves sometimes. :hug:
 
sometimes we all just need to take time out for ourselves instead of working so hard all the time. martha time is good.
 
martha, you are SO not a loser. You are an amazing person. Having met you I can say this with some certainty, even though the people who haven't met you probably sense the same thing.

When I was 30ish I decided to take up the guitar, while many of my friends were climbing the corporate ladder. I felt kind of like you are describing and thoughts like "what a loser--who learns to play guitar at 30?" kept sneaking in there. But as a rather disciplined adult, with the money at the time for a really great teacher, I learned so fast and it was so rewarding. I had quit my job and was making great money temping and so those 4 years were really liberating for me--no job stress and a hobby I loved. Plus, the guitar lessons turned out not to be just about the guitar--it was more like therapy, helping me work through confidence issues, performance anxietyetc. It was an amazing time for me back in NYC, some of the happiest of my life.
 
I agree- Martha time is good time. It sounds like having time to yourself and learning how to play cello will be much more rewarding for you than pursuing your masters, so go for it! And you're not a loser. :)
 
right now I can hear cellos..... they are a beautiful instrument, resonant , dramatic, subtle. We need more cello players.
go for it martha. you already are an excellent teacher.
 
:heart:

:sniffle:

You guys rock! I don't think I was fishing, but I'm glad you said the nice things you did!

I don't know why this is bothering me as much as it is. I'll get over it, but there's still a lingering disappointment with myself. :tsk: You guys are helping, though!

:hug:
 
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