autumn

[Idun]

sorry I don't know if I really should post this, and here, but I feel I just have to say this somewhere, you don't have to answer or anything if you don't feel for it. But I've had so much going on the last couple of months I had to write it down and look at it.

-my grandfather died, 70 years old(not very old), out of a sudden on the 21st september
-my grandfather's funeral was on my halfbrother's birthday the 14th october
-I got robbed on the 26th october
-my beloved dog died only eight years old on the 24th october, and I got to know it.. on the 30th of october because I was away when it happened
-my fav high school teacher died the 21st october. But I got to know it yesterday. I had been too afraid of visiting her because I had heard she was being very sick.. and now I feel very bad about it.
-school's tought in general
-my mother's way of behaving is affecting me
- I got to know yesterday that the wife of my father is pregnant. and I'm 18 and now I feel I don't want to stay home anymore. At least not in my dad's house. My "family" already is too complicated.. two houses, two "families" one containing two half brothers, mother and husband, another containing father, one half brother, wife with three children.
-My parents are always blaming eachother and I'm very confused by the "facts"(according to themselves)they are telling me about eachother.

And during this time I also have school as I earlier mentioned (last year before university, very nervous about my grades) with lots of homework, tests and everything.. Sometimes I don't know what to do to get through all this. Though I guess things will get better.

Can you believe how I feel right now?

 

[Purplereign]

i'm sorry you're having such a crappy time of it
be kind to yourself okay - you will find the light at the end of the tunnel

 

[last unicorn]

Sorry to read about the bad times and many problems you're having.
There are often phases in life where we feel everything is coming together and there seems to be no way out.
Every little problem becomes very big and adds to the feeling of everything going wrong.
I'm having quite a difficult phase as well right now and I've had phases like that in the past where a lot of really crappy things happened.
All I can say is I assure you that you will reach the end of the tunnel and be in the light again, all bad things come to an end someday and you will be fine.
Just take care of yourself and do something good for yourself. Turn to people who you can talk to and who can give you some comfort, you're not alone.

 

[Idun]

thanks a lot Purplereign and Last unicorn

yeah I just can't understand why everything had to happen at the same time.. and I'm afraid it will happen something more now when all this has happened. Though I really hope it won't. I'm exhausted and tired and really need to rest. but the christmas holiday isn't that faraway now.

take care you too

 

[Carek1230]

s to you all in times of overwhelm. You just need to step back and BREATHE. I've been there, so I know what it's like. I've often been told that God doesn't give us more than we can handle and it's so true. The more stress, frustration and tough times that we pull ourselves through the stronger it makes us. It's just so important in life in general to remember to stop and pamper yourself all the time to keep yourself sane. It certainly helps in dealing with those difficult things we are dealt in our lives.

 

[Idun]

thank you, it feels a bit better by reading this that you've written=) I appreciate your answers so much.

yeah I really want to step back and breathe, but I really don't know how to find any time for it, there has always been something new to take in. But I have to find time for it in some way!

 

[Angela Harlem]

i'm sorry for all your loss

 

[youtooellen]

It's no wonder autumn is painful for you.

I'm sorry about all of the family conflicts and your dog passing away (my dog passed away a few years ago and I didn't take it well). Stay strong! Keep your chin up.
With time, things will get better. The last year of school before university is tough, but you seem to be doing a fantastic job holding yourself up. Even though you feel it all weighing you down, remember how far you've come. Give yourself some credit for holding through all of these rough times. What goes up, must come down. There's always sunshine after the rain..

 

[KhanadaRhodes]

wow, i'm so sorry to hear all of this. it'd be bad enough to have that happen in a year, let alone a couple months! i'll be keeping you in my thoughts, i hope things get better for you. hopefully things will improve for you. good luck.

 

[Idun]

thank you so much yeah it has definitely been too much just in a few months..



I'm sorry to hear about your dog youtooellen, dogs are very important family members. It feels strange not to have my dog here anymore.

 

[The_Edge89]

Ouch, sounds like you've had an unusually rough autumn. Americans don't call it "Fall" for no reason it seems. To let these emotions out was a first step I guess to make sure you don't hit the ground too hard in what seems to be a steep fall for you right now.
It's just easy for me to say it but I felt like I had to say something so here goes; Hang in there. Walk On usually does the trick for me when I'm in a bitter mood, so you might want to listen to it a couple of times, I don't know.

If you've been following my Last.fm profile the last month or so you might've noticed that I'm listening to Jenny Lewis quite a lot as well these days. Just try to keep the positive thoughts and aspects of your life alive there's always tough periods in every persons life we experience them every now and then. This is how Jenny puts it:

Godspeed, keep the lighthouse in sight

Don't lose track of the lighthouse and be strong until you reach it, I know you can do it, don't give up hope!
Tell me if you want someone to have further discussions about this issue with, I'll try to be around if you need me.

 

[Idun]

hi, yes you're right, this has really been a fall for me. But I'm listening to Walk On right now, it's helping. =)
I'm trying not to lose track, though even trying is difficult sometimes. After the first thing that happened I kind of felt like I could get through, but right now when I have it all.. I guess I need more time.
thank you, your post helped a lot

btw jenny lewis seems to be very good. I had actually never heard of her before.

 

[lauramullen]

autumm is hard for me as well. My best friend was killed 5 years ago in October. He was stabbed throught the heart by another guy I know at a party and I saw the whole thing. I always get down this time of the year.