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oliveu2cm

oliveu2cm

Rock n' Roll Doggie FOB
Joined
Jun 22, 2001
Messages
8,334
Location
Live from Boston
I abhor the media today and the brainwashing it does to girls and women. I hate it. I consider myself a very confident woman and yet once in a while shit just leaks in my brain, all these messages we are accosted with 24/7 about not being thin enough. It GETS me so badddddddddd!!!!

our society is SO FUCKED Up in that sense!! Takes away from women and makes them worry about their thighs?!
mad.gif
and it comes at you from every angle, since you are BORN and its just realllly hard to beat down this voice in your head that is not yours.

WHY must we suffer like this?! Our time and energies are worth so much more than this!

------------------
She comes in colors You know she's gonna turn the daylight on

*U2TakeMeHigher*
 
well i dont know if you're being serious or if u think this is a joke but i dont care- it's something that really upsets me and makes me want to tear the media apart. how 12 year old girls are starving themselves to be "thin" and how NO female tv stars are even "average" weight, they are all underweight. why girls energies instead of going to school and friends and sports (like boys do) go to makeup and the size of their thighs. it's absolutely backwards and supressive. a woman's worth being tied up in how she looks! ridiculous



------------------
She comes in colors You know she's gonna turn the daylight on

*U2TakeMeHigher*
 
Me too, girl. And the scary thing is, I find myself looking at magazines ads of some "healthy" model thinking to myself, "Wow, she's kinda big." I mean, WTF?! I'd probably look anorexic if I were her weight, but here I am looking at her thinking she's huge because she's not some size 0.
rolleyes.gif


I feel a bit better about things, but not much. I've always been in the middle, not skinny, and yet not "big"-big (I'm so glad I'm tall!), but when I see stores like Lane Bryant all of a sudden hyping up the sexiness of big girls and Camryn Manheim looking glamourous at the Emmys I can't help but think that plus sized women have been put in the same bin as minorites when it comes to exposure in the media. And even then they still get more than the big and beautiful.

It really makes you wonder, but I'm feeling pretty good about myself lately. It's taken me a long time, but for any man to want me, he's got to want all of me!
biggrin.gif


------------------
Bend me, break me
Anyway you need me
All I want is you
 
Hey we boys go through the same thing ya know.

Or at least we have our own version of it. We are judged from very little to well into adulthood on our ability to bench-press and throw a ball around. Never regarded for our ideas or passions, only for our balls.
 
I know what you mean.

That voice hurts even more though when it comes from what people have said to you who are supposed to love and support you-all males, btw.
frown.gif


I'm tired of seeing unrealistic models and actresses being held up as the standard we are expected to live up to. And those pictures in ALL of those magazines are airbrushed. It is scary to see very young girls worrying about their weight to such an extreme.

Sometimes it sure does feel like, as a woman, that no one feels your worth is anything other than that.
 
Originally posted by oliveu2cm:
well i dont know if you're being serious or if u think this is a joke but i dont care-
Click to expand...

No! It upsets me too! I just go about everything in a joking matter. It helps me deal with life.
 
There was a thread about this very issue in FYM a couple of weeks ago. I don't remember what it was called, but it was precisely about weight issues in society and how media reinforces those preconceptions. You might do well to look it up. A lot of people spilled about their own insecurities and ideas in that thread.

------------------
Well, the God I believe in isn't short on cash, mister. --Bono

But a day will come
In this dawning age
When an honest man
Sees an honest wage.
--The Edge
 
I fucking hate shit like this. And I'm sick of feeling "inadequate" in this society. My last boyfriend (jerkoff!) began to criticize my body before we broke up. He said I was getting "too big" for him. But I had gone through several surgeries on my ankle, and wasn't able to work out like I used to. Meanwhile, he didn't do anything...used to be big football star...I'll admit it, he used to have a great looking body. But he "let himself go"...but me gaining a few pounds after being laid up all summer is bad?
I'm sorry, but fuck that shit!
mad.gif
I'm so sick of double standards..

------------------

Just as you find me
Always I will be
A little bit too free
With myself
 
Lady Lemon, Ive seen pics of you. Are you serious?
Thats absolute bullshit. You're a slim girl for God's sake!

Don't even get me started on this topic guys.
I have had a major complex about my body image since I was 15 Olive. I have tried it all. I have hated myself. I still do sometimes.
It makes me ill to think that Kate Winslet is actually painted as a "bigger" girl. Its utterly absurd that she's even in that category as a role model for bigger girls. The girl is thin. Compare her to me or any other girl on the street and she's like a model.
The saddest part is half these magazines actually taper off the MODELS' thighs and hips in photogrpahs with photoshop. Ive seen them do it. They actually get rid of a third of a thigh, and these are models!

I refuse to be sucked into it anymore.
Say it with me girls,
Im young, Im feminine, Im strong, Im smart, Im beautiful.
Say it to yourself now and believe it or Im going to come round and jump on you all.

------------------
Engaged to a Rockstar
 
Thanks manda. Like I said...it's absolute bullshit. I'm a real woman, and if a guy can't handle that, than he can go stick it...
 
anyway, I think most men prefer women with curves, I think a lot of times really young guys do get caught up in wanting girls to be extremely thin, I think they just don't know any better

[and btw, Kate Winslet is a goddess! that makes me fucking angry that people say that about her, and she's had a baby now, and she just looks better and better all the time; check out her pics from the Oscars]
 
I'm prolly gonna get flamed for this, but what shits me more is a lack of realism. Yes, everything you said about aiming for stick figures is bullshit, it is.
But what shits me more lately is fairly trim, healthy slim nice sized girls complaining.

Here's the stinger. Manda I hate to do this, but I'm going to use you as an example. You are small, I'd even say petite. Yet you have hangups about your weight, as we all do. I get so frustrated every time you mention this because there is just NO WAY I can ever make you see you how I do, and that is a gorgeous girl with absolutely no worries in the weight area. Again sorry to single you out. You are not unique, so many girls feel like this. No matter what size we are, its never good enough.

But Mand, you are good enough. Trust me. You are beautiful.

I will be back to delete this once Ive gotten over my shit attack at the warped reality the media has pushed onto us.

mad.gif
 
Originally posted by z edge:
Hey we boys go through the same thing ya know.

Or at least we have our own version of it. We are judged from very little to well into adulthood on our ability to bench-press and throw a ball around. Never regarded for our ideas or passions
Click to expand...
I agree 100%

------------------
Salome
Shake it, shake it, shake it
 
Originally posted by ~LadyLemon~:

I'm sorry, but fuck that shit!
mad.gif
I'm so sick of double standards..
Click to expand...

yeah!

------------------
When life hands you a lemon, say "Oh yeah, I like lemons. What else you got?" --Henry Rollins
 
Originally posted by Angela Harlem:

Here's the stinger. Manda I hate to do this, but I'm going to use you as an example. You are small, I'd even say petite. Yet you have hangups about your weight, as we all do. I get so frustrated every time you mention this because there is just NO WAY I can ever make you see you how I do, and that is a gorgeous girl with absolutely no worries in the weight area. Again sorry to single you out. You are not unique, so many girls feel like this. No matter what size we are, its never good enough.

But Mand, you are good enough. Trust me. You are beautiful.

I will be back to delete this once Ive gotten over my shit attack at the warped reality the media has pushed onto us.

mad.gif
Click to expand...

Oh no!!
See the thing that I really MEANT in this thread was how ridiculous it is that the media WARPS our brains!! Because I'm guessing I'm like Amanada, and PopAngel and LadyLemon.... girls who have a LOT of self confidence and usually no problems with how they look- I love how I look! But then just every so often, you just get HIT with feeling like SHIT and feeling inadequeate, and the stupid thing is that I *know* it's stupid, I *know* it's taking up my time and energy that could be going to work, or extracurricular activities, but it's going to the size of my thighs?! It's RIDICULOUS!

And I dont think it's fair, although I get the sense you know that, to get mad if someone who is healthy and beautiful complains.... because some days like I said that voice just doesn't shut up.
 
Sorry Olive! I knew what you meant in your 1st post, I just did the usual thing of going off on my own tangent. See, I'm with you all the way. The media is evil and powerful in causing a lot of this kind of thing. I hate to see the end result, and that is beautiful healthy girls experiencing any kind of doubt at all.

Its wrong, it pisses me off for so many different reasons that I shouldn't really elaborate on in here.
 
Originally posted by Angela Harlem:


Its wrong, it pisses me off for so many different reasons that I shouldn't really elaborate on in here.
Click to expand...

that's what this is for! if you feel comfortable!
smile.gif
i'm going to drag my friend here to talk some more about it when I get her online.
 
Originally posted by oliveu2cm:
I abhor the media today and the brainwashing it does to girls and women. I hate it. I consider myself a very confident woman and yet once in a while shit just leaks in my brain, all these messages we are accosted with 24/7 about not being thin enough. It GETS me so badddddddddd!!!!

our society is SO FUCKED Up in that sense!! Takes away from women and makes them worry about their thighs?!
mad.gif
and it comes at you from every angle, since you are BORN and its just realllly hard to beat down this voice in your head that is not yours.

WHY must we suffer like this?! Our time and energies are worth so much more than this!
Click to expand...

agree.


------------------
When life hands you a lemon, say "Oh yeah, I like lemons. What else you got?" --Henry Rollins
 
Yeah i saw pics of Whitney at MJ's 30-years-in-business party, and pics of Alista Flockhart, etc... and they look ANOREXIC, not thin to me.
That's going overboard with the "thinnes" thing IMO.

And i couldn't care less if the media says "be skinny. be VERY skinny." I'm lucky to have a figure not to have to worry about weight problems (47 kg at 155 cm - a bit skinny, but ok), and i can't even imagine what overweight girls go through being tossed these images.

And i have my insecurity share seeing other girls on the streets, trust me.
 
Originally posted by The Wanderer:
anyway, I think most men prefer women with curves, I think a lot of times really young guys do get caught up in wanting girls to be extremely thin, I think they just don't know any better
Click to expand...

You're right. I've heard that most guys prefer women who are somewhat overweight (whatever that is) to women who are somewhat underweight (whatever that is.)

I've always been naturally thin. I would be a liar if I were to say I didn't basically like it. It is kind of nice to know that, at this point in my life at least, I can eat whatever I want and not worry about gaining weight. But you know what? There are disadvantages to being thin too. People think that they're at liberty to make comments about your weight, even rude comments. It bugs me if I go to someone's house and they offer me coffee or tea and I say "No I just want water" as I sometimes do, and they're like "Ooohhh...keeping your weight down?" and I'm like "no, actually, I just like water!". There is certainly a huge, sickening problem in society with the pressure on girls to look anorexic. But I think some people believe that if you're thin, even naturally, you are automatically part of the problem. I did not choose to be this way. Some of us ARE naturally thin. And I get almost zero attention from guys, for the most part, which I actually find a bit weird because I am pretty happy with the way I look overall. I think it may be that I have a "don't touch me" aura and also that I'm six feet tall. I think a lot of guys are afraid of tall women.

It is pretty sick, though, that although I am officially a bit underweight, I'm over the average weight for a model. I saw a photo of a model once which was simply disgusting--you could see all her bone structure and her SKULL. It was worse than average.

It's so ridiculous. We're supposed to be way thin and we're also supposed to have huge breasts. I don't think anyone fits society's image of "perfection."

------------------
See the bird with the leaf in her mouth
After the flood all the colours came out

[This message has been edited by scatteroflight (edited 05-10-2002).]
 
Originally posted by scatteroflight:
I think a lot of guys are afraid of tall women.
Click to expand...

Hear Hear. As a 5'10 woman, I can attest to that one. What's the matter guys? Afraid we could beat you up? Insecure about your *ahem* size?
biggrin.gif
tongue.gif


Originally posted by scatteroflight:
It's so ridiculous. We're supposed to be way thin and we're also supposed to have huge breasts. I don't think anyone fits society's image of "perfection."
Click to expand...

Barbie does.
rolleyes.gif
 
Fantastic thread.

I am not "willowy" or super thin, but I'm not fat, and I still get the weirdest looks (not complimentary ones, I promise you) from practically anorexic girls. All the time. And to be honest, it made me feel bad for awhile but then I realized that it didn't matter -- I felt good about myself, and I wasn't going to starve myself to look like them.
smile.gif


------------------
"I just don't care anymore, won't cry these tears anymore.."

Popheart.org
 
I always believe I'm not that fat, but in Hong Kong, most Chinese girls are thin and small. When I walk to the streets, I looks like a huge monster or something... I don't like the fact that I can't even find any clothes to buy in those shops which girls in my age usually go just because the clothes sold there are too small! And I'm not even overweight!

One of my friends' ex-boyfriend dumped her because he thinks she's 'too fat' and she's just 50 kg (she's about 168 cm tall)! I'm glad to know that most of the boys are not like this, but it terrifies me that someone actually believe every girl have to look like those models.
 
Originally posted by scatteroflight:

I've always been naturally thin. I would be a liar if I were to say I didn't basically like it. It is kind of nice to know that, at this point in my life at least, I can eat whatever I want and not worry about gaining weight. But you know what? There are disadvantages to being thin too. People think that they're at liberty to make comments about your weight, even rude comments. It bugs me if I go to someone's house and they offer me coffee or tea and I say "No I just want water" as I sometimes do, and they're like "Ooohhh...keeping your weight down?" and I'm like "no, actually, I just like water!". There is certainly a huge, sickening problem in society with the pressure on girls to look anorexic. But I think some people believe that if you're thin, even naturally, you are automatically part of the problem. I did not choose to be this way. Some of us ARE naturally thin. And I get almost zero attention from guys, for the most part, which I actually find a bit weird because I am pretty happy with the way I look overall. I think it may be that I have a "don't touch me" aura and also that I'm six feet tall. I think a lot of guys are afraid of tall women.
Click to expand...

Scatter you are SO right here! Because it doesn't even matter WHAT your weight is- you're going to get harrassment about it no matter what. That's really the bottom line- and no woman is exempt from this!

And we even do it ourselves- how we bond with other women about being "too fat" or atually having hips or how we "shouldn't be eating this" and we relate this way... and it's a negative way.

We need to start a revolution girls. Our insecurities that are ingrained in us from society as children are billion dollar industries- for someone else. It's sick, and most of all I hate to see how it ruins my friends, how they have to go to the gym twice a day, burn at least 800 calories so they can "eat".



------------------
Another soul.. another SOUL in this world.... beautiful boy!

*Happy Birthday Bono*
 
Oh man... DO NOT get me started on this.

I studied this in college for years and as a woman have experienced my OWN version of the gnawing insecurity that this sort of media manipulation creates.

I did a study once about employment and apperance for women and in a poll I found that most women, over 80% felt deterred from applying for some jobs based on their looks, because they thought they were not pretty enough to have those jobs. They didn't mean stripper or model either but like waitresses, shop clerks, secretaries and so forth. Whereas in the study very very few of the men, under 10% had ever felt anxiety about applying for a job because of their apperance and when they did, they were concerned about class issues, looking too poor for the job, not attractiveness.

I do agree that men are subjected to beauty norms too, but I see more realistic looking men in the media such as Jerry Seinfeld, Jay Leno, Dave Letterman, Ray Romano, John Goodman, Ben Kingsly, Kevin Spacey who are NOT ugly, but not unattainable images of masculine perfection. Granted, there are the Brad Pitts of the world and so forth, but my point is that there is more diversity in acceptable apperances for men in the media than there is for women. For example, the show Law and Order (which I really like!!!) always has MOSTLY realistic looking male lawyers and cops (with the exception perhaps of Benjamin Bratt) and MOSTLY supermodel-ish female attorneys. I've observed this about many shows such as Ally McBeal (blech), ER, Alias, I'm sure you can think of more. In short, women on television are allowed to play power positions such as lawyer, doctor, white house staffer, judge, but only as long as they don't actually look like women while they do it.

*sigh*

We should stop worrying about our thighs and start critiquing the media, not just accepting what it dishes out.

*rant over*

[This message has been edited by blueeyes (edited 05-11-2002).]
 
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