White Collar Anguish

[elevated_u2_fan]

And I swear to god, if anyone else touches my stapler I'm going to burn the goddamned building down...

 

[phillyfan26]

I forgot to make a cover page for my TPS Reports.

That was the end of my white collar days.

I do freelance now. Maybe you've read my stuff, under the biline of "Jane Doe."

 

[No spoken words]

I have a powerful office, befitting someone of my powerful status here at work.

I issue commands from here. The power I feel is immense...but, fleeting....and afterwards, I need comforting, really.

But, nobody ever issues me a hug.

 

[phillyfan26]

Just imagine that every O in your memos are hugs and every X is a kiss.

 

[UberBeaver]

So to all those white collar slaves, if you had to do it differently what would you rather be doing - all things being equal; same pay, same benefits & providing that you still had to financially support yourself. Firefighter? Lumberjack? Entrepreneur? Author?

I'd do author. I think I may have the skills, but I know I don't have the discipline.

Or maybe I'd just double post for a living.

lol.

I'd be Arthur. He was awesome, just a little drunk English fella. I could fake the accent, especially after a few drinks.

 

[No spoken words]

Just imagine that every O in your memos are hugs and every X is a kiss.

So when my coworker with dyslexia wrote me and said to "GOOO FuXX yoooourself", he was really being nice?

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

So when my coworker with dyslexia wrote me and said to "GOOO FuXX yoooourself", he was really being nice?

i think it's better for all if you assume that is the case...

 

[phillyfan26]

So when my coworker with dyslexia wrote me and said to "GOOO FuXX yoooourself", he was really being nice?

If you've seen some of these FYM threads, you can interpret pretty much anything to say anything you want.

 

[No spoken words]

We got moved out of FYM, though, because FYM is too busy handling Placenta threads.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

We got moved out of FYM, though, because FYM is too busy handling Placenta threads.

Apparently this topic was a little too "mind-freeing" for some...

 

[redhotswami]

So when my coworker with dyslexia wrote me and said to "GOOO FuXX yoooourself", he was really being nice?

i didn't know you and beav worked together

 

[No spoken words]

i didn't know you and beav worked together

Mia brought some funny to the site today.

Eat it, ya'll. ("It" does not refer to anyone's placenta)

 

[Zoots]

OMG! If working about 15 - 18 hours unpaid overtime every week means anything, I feel your pain! Why can't they fucking pay salaried employees overtime?

 

[Vincent Vega]

Mia brought some funny to the site today.

Eat it, ya'll. ("It" does not refer to anyone's placenta)

*puts napkin away*

 

[Bono's shades]

OMG! If working about 15 - 18 hours unpaid overtime every week means anything, I feel your pain! Why can't they fucking pay salaried employees overtime?

I've been through that crap with previous jobs. It wouldn't have been so bad if I was an actual manager and made a decent salary to begin with, but I wasn't. I'm hourly now, and I'm so glad. I had to work 44 hours last week, but I got paid overtime.

 

[Zoots]

It wouldn't have been so bad if I was an actual manager and made a decent salary to begin with, but I wasn't.

Exactly! That's what bugs me! I'm a manufacturing engineer but not a manager so my salary is just okay... average. And to not get paid for overtime doesn't do much in way of motivation to work. The thing is, other than this issue.. the ridiculous amount of overtime, I like my job. It's much better than my previous one, which, granted, had little overtime. You can't win em all. I would seriously like to know how much the hourly people are making after working 58 to 65 hours a week!!!

 

[redhotswami]

Eat it, ya'll. ("It" does not refer to anyone's placenta)

*puts napkin away*

ohemgee i'm ROLLING!

 

[randhail]

I would seriously like to know how much the hourly people are making after working 58 to 65 hours a week!!!

Just look at the salary of cops after all their overtime (construction details, etc.) They can make 6 figures easy.

 

[zonelistener]

next time, can you post a pucking memo by the water cooler

Apparently this topic was a little too "mind-freeing" for some...

Reading this thread was kinda like eating my own placenta!

Thanks guys!

 

[Dalton]

I've got an office and a cool title, but the secretary that they gave me is borderline retarded ... do you think they are just testing me, or is this one of those 'karma is a bitch' type of things?

It is questions like these that keep me up at night! I'm grinding my teeth all the time. I walk into a meeting with the uppersuits and I can't tell if they are patronizing me or if I am paranoid.

I sit in my office and watch the construction worker who is pretending that the hose from the near by fire hydrant is his penis as he sprays its water towards my female colleagues and I just think - where did my life go wrong?

 

[anitram]

Exactly! That's what bugs me! I'm a manufacturing engineer but not a manager so my salary is just okay... average. And to not get paid for overtime doesn't do much in way of motivation to work. The thing is, other than this issue.. the ridiculous amount of overtime, I like my job. It's much better than my previous one, which, granted, had little overtime. You can't win em all. I would seriously like to know how much the hourly people are making after working 58 to 65 hours a week!!!

That's still not as bad as people who are stuck on a billing system, where it takes your roughly 1.5 hours or more to perform 1 billable hour.

 

[UberBeaver]

I sit in my office and watch the construction worker who is pretending that the hose from the near by fire hydrant is his penis as he sprays its water towards my female colleagues and I just think - where did my life go wrong?

lol.

 

[No spoken words]

Tonight at work the lights shut off automatically at 9pm, so I fucking kept working in the day, with just the glow from my monitor to guide me. So, hey, coal miners out there, now I know what it's like to work thousands of feet under ground, in the dark, so quit your whining. Also, we ran out of legal sized paper today.

 

[UberBeaver]

Dude - wah wah wah. I haven't had a tape dispenser or a scissor in over a year. If I need tape I need to rip with my teeth, like I'm some kind of animal. Ugh.

 

[No spoken words]

I once had no scissors, so I took a lot of paper clips and melded them together, then sharpened them, and made me a good ol' fashioned office shiv. I still had nothing to cut paper with, but, I had something to attack coworkers with, and that was good enough for me.

 

[UberBeaver]

Sweet.

 

[No spoken words]

Well, you're not going to believe this.

They did some work in my office early this morning, and, it looks like there is some residue on my office floor. Could be some sort of powder, not really sure. Might be cocaine, even, you just don't know what these construction types do. Regardless, how in the hell am I expected to perform up to my usual professional standards when my office is littered? How am I supposed to focus!?!?!? This day sucks already.

 

[UberBeaver]

I hear that. I think given the circumstances, it's probably a good time to call maintenance, and then leave for a few hours to golf. Relax a bit. Then use the weekend to settle down. Hopefully by Monday you'll be ready to go back and take care of business. No one said life was easy.

 

[elevated_u2_fan]

I hear you...

The cleaning lady forgot to empty my wastebasket last night and there is granola bar wrapper still in there from yesterday, how am I supposed to concentrate???

I'm seriously considering taking this up with HR.

 

[No spoken words]

Also, and you guys will relate....I ordered a mini-fridge for my office like a week ago. What's that? Has it arrived? Nope. So, still, I have to get up and walk like 100 feet (That's 33.3 yards!) to one of the common refrigerators. So, not only do I have this insane walk, but, my food or drinks or whatnot have to coexist (thanks, Bono) with the foodstuffs of people who are, let's be honest, not exactly at my level, in myriad ways. This is nothing short of an outrage, really.