Funniest Bono jokes...

[jonnytakeawalk]

Anyone got a favorite? I quite liked this tweet I read the other day...

'Breakfast with Bono is the most self-important meal of the day. '

 

[lemonfly]

What's the difference between God and Bono? God doesn't walk through the streets of Dublin thinking he's Bono.
(I think that's how it goes - I was drunk in a bar somewhere when I heard it.)

 

[cobl04]

I really don't think this is appropriate. We are fans. Imagine if Bono were to read this. I thought we were better than this.

 

[bonocomet]

Q: Why did Bono fall off the stage?

A: He was too close to The Edge.

 

[GirlsAloudFan]

Why did Bono cross the road?

Spoiler

Because I had sex with his daughter.

 

[Axver]

Who buys U2 records anyway? It's just music for plumbers and bricklayers. Bono, what a slob. You'd think with all that climbing about he does, he'd look real fit and that. But he's real fat, y'know. Reminds me of a soddin' mountain goat.

 

[LadySpinHead]

A musician dies and goes to heaven. He meets Elvis, John Lennon and Jimi Hendrix. Suddenly Bono flies by. "Hey, I didn't know Bono was dead," the musician says. "He's not," Elvis replies. "That's God. He likes to pretend he's Bono."

Stolen from Bill Flanagan-

 

[digitize]

Not Bono, but...

Bill Bailey U2 - YouTube

 

[bono_man2002]

Not wanting to turn this into a parody thread, but eh.

Apres Match - U2 Spoof - YouTube

 

[lemonfly]

^

 

[Danny Boy]

How can you tell when Bono is lying?

Spoiler

His lips are moving.

 

[waynetravis]

What does Bono say to god in heaven?

"I believe you are sitting in my chair"

 

[last unicorn]

^ This one is really great

I'm sure Bono has some favourites among the Bono jokes.

 

[corianderstem]

Knock Knock.

(Who's there?)

Interrupting Bono.

(Interrupting B...)

UNO! DOS! TRES! CATORCE!

 

[U2360]

I'm not always a fan of these jokes, but I couldn't help laughing at the "God likes to pretend He's Bono" one.

 

[Rachel D.]

How many members of U2 does it take to screw in a lightbulb?


One-- Bono holds the lightbulb and the world revolves around him.

 

[mad1]

LOL LOL Rach cute!

 

[The Sad Punk]

Frank Sinatra & Bono (U2) : I've Got You Under My Skin (HQ) - YouTube

 

[corianderstem]

Those Bono is God jokes have been around since the 80s.

 

[BoMac]

 

[Streets613]

Why did Bono cross the road?

Spoiler

Because I had sex with his daughter.

Eve

 

[AltRockAddict]

speaking of spoofs, this is my fave (my concert in Anaheim was postponed a year when I first saw this)
Hitler Finds Out U2 Tour Gets Postponed - YouTube

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

It's even better that it's Robin Williams. Cause well, you know

Robin Williams | Stand Up | Bono Stop Clapping Your Hands - YouTube