I haven’t wrote in a long while so need to write this out

*sigh* poor mum. She only went and thought of my handicapped brother when she got it that we all went to the Isle of Man, two weeks ago…………….to give him a break.

Not only did she slip and get a fracture in the back of her ankle on our last night, and is now in a cast for the next 6 – 8 weeks, but since Sunday evening round 7pm after she was let out, her cat, our little 2 year old sweetheart, Megan, has not...

Isnt it, like? Its so weird and easy to say it........because its so selfish.......yet you have umpteen reasons.........related to you or not.

Perhaps - all this week I have said 'I dont care!' in a typical smash the car keys down onto the floor and just leave a trail of mess behind me.

Right now Im in a 'I dont care!' mode prob cause Im hurting....Im hurting cause I feel Im never gonna have someone. Its so fucking obvious.......pple are disappointed when they see...

For fuck sake it would appear there could be a decaying mouse under my room's floorboards at home.......my bed is next to a cupboard with a tank in it, but as the tank is no longer used, we really should have gotten rid of it and opened up that part long ago, but recently this disgusting 'musty' smell has come into my room and there is a hole down into the floorboards in that cupboard plus vents at the top, and it IS coming from that hole....so like for fuck sake, two restless nights with a lingering...

really...short..entry.................but who cares. I looked at myself in the mirror in the car today to put on some pink lipstick and saw myself getting old.

You know, that typical smile-wrinkle look.........blah blah


and u know what?


I got excited.........

I may have missed out on so much in my younger life....and have jumped a huge blank gap into the present, and may have lost that lovely youthful look to attract guys,...

oh gawsh where to start....somehow its just easier to be in here now talking to you all than out in Interland where so many pple are 'pissed off'...........pissed off at each other, pissed off no-one pays attention, pissed off here there and every-bloomin-where! ARGH! Still, Im not one of those persons...............I just keep my ass out and stay quiet............I think u reach a peak at some places......I was on often......then I quit a while..........now Im back, but not quite in the same...