(OVER TWO MONTHS LATER)
It was almost like she had never been away, Antonia blinked as she was blinded by the flashing camera's as she and Gareth stepped out of the limo to enter the hotel to join her father who was attending this charity bash to help his election campaign.
She wore her fixed smile and felt Gareth's hand on on her back as they walked through the hotel entrance and she tried not to want to move away from his touch
.
It was all a facade of course, all for the benefit for the press and the public, pretending to play happy families for her fathers sake
Gareth had not laid a finger on her physically from she had arrived back, but Antonia had been correct in her sceptisism that he wanted to make a real go of their marriage, all he cared about was keeping in her father's good books. He had attended the marriage guidence counselor's office twice with her inside the last few months, most other weekly appointments he made excuses about being busy at work and unable to attend.
Antonia was sure he was still having affairs, but doing it a lot more discreetly now, apart from having to attend this functions to support her father, he didn't pay too much attention to her. At one time Antonia would have found this all distressing, but now she didn't care. It didn't matter anymore to her.. she had stopped loving him a long time ago, even more so from she had went to Ireland and met Bono.
The thought of Gareth kissing her or wanting to make love to her made shudder in distaste, she was glad he never approached her in that way, the most they had to do was give a brief hug for the camera's when they were in public, apart from that they now lived separate lives. She lost herself in working on her favourite causes and charities to keep up her self esteem, that she could contribute something useful in her life and give it some meaning amidst all the pretence.
Seamus phoned her up regulary and even came over to visit her a few times, she assured him she was coping fine.. she longed to ask him if he had heard from Bono, but was scared hearing about him would weaken her resolve to not get in contact with him.
But yet it was her happy time in Ireland that she spent with him and Seamus that kept her going in her moments of dispair, at least she had them, and no one could take them away from her she told herself comfortingly.....
***********************************************************************
Bono had never been one to sit back in his laurels when there was any form of injustice came to his attention.
And right now he was feeling a great personal injustice that Antonia had severed all contact with him.
He only discovered the day he got back to Dublin and had phoned Seamus that Antonia's father had came and took her back to
England, Seamus had told Bono about the picture of them in the gossip magazine and how Antonia had told him to pass on the message that she thought it would be better if Bono didn't try and reach her or see her for a while.
He had been concerned and worried, and not too happy with this request but despite that he felt he had to abide by it and respect her wishes. But as time went by despite the fact his life was more than busy with the band and other things instead of getting easier, and the memory of their time in Ireland fading away, he could not stop thinking about her wanting to see her again.
His friends and fellow bandmembers, tried to get him to take his mind of her, encouraging him to date other women, he made some half hearted attempts, but then he was watching the news on tv, they were discussing the election and he spotted Antonia in the background as they showed her fathers campaign speech.
His attention was totally riveted on the screen, he had wanted to see her face again so much, that even just this little odd glimpse was enough to make him realise his feelings for her were just as strong as ever, she was smiling and clapping, but he could tell it was all for show and false. He had studied her expressions enough when they had been together, and knew where her smile was genuine and when it was just put on for other peoples benefit..
If he thought she was really happy he might have tried harder to just let her go, but realising that might not be the case, he felt a sense of frustration he couldn't be there for her, which was why he got in contact with Seamus a few days later in an attempt to find out how she was doing.
"Tell me truthfully Seamus how do you think she is doing.. is she really happy?" he enquired over the phone.
The pause that followed at Seamus' end of the line, spoke volumes to Bono. "She seems to be coping just fine" Seamus finally replied.
"That's not what I asked" Bono said, determined he was not going to be brushed aside. He heard Seamus sigh at his end of the phone. The Irish man had come to realise himself that Bono's feeling for Antonia was more than just friendship, and he suspected Antonia felt the same way, but he was trying to protect Antonia from anymore upheaval that might send her down the path of self destruction she had took before.
But now he found himself questioning what would be right for her, yes she seem to be coping better now and accepted her role in life.. but was she happy? Not in the proper sense, not in the way Bono was asking.
"I need to see her Seamus" Bono then said, "I have tried my hardest to give her the space she needs and let her decide what she wants, but I seen her on the tv Seamus, even though it was only for a few moments, I could see the sadness in her eyes, the same sadness that was there when I first met her, nothing has really changed has it, her marriage is still a sham and her life is just one big play act, "
"Bono what do you want me to say" Seamus replied in dispair, "I am trying to be there for her, I just don't want to make the situation any worse, I want her to be happy as much as you do, I am not sure how she will react if you come barging into the scene upsetting things"
"Maybe it's what she needs, a wake up call" Bono replied "I could make her see she doesn't have to stay in that life, I could give her an option a choice to escape and get out of it.. I could take care of her Seamus.. you know I would treat her right, I could make her happy"
"Yes..I do know that Bono... but I just don't want to see you doing something rash that you both end up getting hurt and regretting"
Seamus replied in concern
"I think I will regret it more if I don't" Bono stated, "If you had the chance all over again Seamus, would you not take the opportunity to tell Toni's mother Mary, how you really felt about her? how you lost out on the chance of happiness because you didn't." he reminded him "Well I can't do that Seamus I am sorry..please don't deny Toni my love" he then finished quietly
"You are not going to give up are you?" Seamus realised, then after a short paused added resigningly "Well in that case I guess have no choice but to help you"
"Thank you!" Bono exclaimed happily glad his argument had worked, "You will not regret it, I promise"...
*********************************************
The Charity bash was much like every other she had attended, now inside the hotel function room, there was much backslapping and handshaking for her father, Antonia remained in the background smiling exchanging polite conversation with the others in the room quietly supporting her father as duty dictated or as he expected.
Mingling with the guests, her and Gareth naturally went their seperate ways at each end of the room, Antonia counting the hours already when it would be all be over and she could go home and relax and stop all this pretence. Then much to her suprise she glanced at the entrance door and noticed Seamus saunter in dressed in his best suite looking not too comfortable and out of place in his surroundings. He then started scanning the room, she realised he was looking for her,
She was happy to see him, and waved to catch his attention and started to walk over in his direction, still a little surprised he had shown up like this, he was the last person she expected to show.
Seamus had noticed her walking towards her and smiled looking relieved.
"Seamus," she greeted him as they hugged "What are you doing here, I didn't think this was your scene.. why didn't you tell me you were coming?" she demanded happily
"I wanted to suprise you" Seamus smiled, and then he shifted uneasily "The things I do, to surprise you" he murmered
"Well I am really glad you came" Antonia beamed.
"Actually I didn't come alone" Seamus informed her, "I brought someone with me who is really keen to meet you"
He looked around behind him, Antonia followed his gaze, wondering who he meant.
Then she caught sight of Bono, coming through the door, her heart seem to do a somersault in her chest at the sight of him now approaching her smiling a little uncertainly, she was unable to move or speak, but found her eyes locked with his blue ones, reeking havoc with her emotions
"Hi Toni" he spoke up "I thought I would come and join the party".......
**********************
I am writing this chapter to celebrate the fact I finally got my U2 concert tickets for Croke ParK!!
Enjoy!!!!!
It was almost like she had never been away, Antonia blinked as she was blinded by the flashing camera's as she and Gareth stepped out of the limo to enter the hotel to join her father who was attending this charity bash to help his election campaign.
She wore her fixed smile and felt Gareth's hand on on her back as they walked through the hotel entrance and she tried not to want to move away from his touch
.
It was all a facade of course, all for the benefit for the press and the public, pretending to play happy families for her fathers sake
Gareth had not laid a finger on her physically from she had arrived back, but Antonia had been correct in her sceptisism that he wanted to make a real go of their marriage, all he cared about was keeping in her father's good books. He had attended the marriage guidence counselor's office twice with her inside the last few months, most other weekly appointments he made excuses about being busy at work and unable to attend.
Antonia was sure he was still having affairs, but doing it a lot more discreetly now, apart from having to attend this functions to support her father, he didn't pay too much attention to her. At one time Antonia would have found this all distressing, but now she didn't care. It didn't matter anymore to her.. she had stopped loving him a long time ago, even more so from she had went to Ireland and met Bono.
The thought of Gareth kissing her or wanting to make love to her made shudder in distaste, she was glad he never approached her in that way, the most they had to do was give a brief hug for the camera's when they were in public, apart from that they now lived separate lives. She lost herself in working on her favourite causes and charities to keep up her self esteem, that she could contribute something useful in her life and give it some meaning amidst all the pretence.
Seamus phoned her up regulary and even came over to visit her a few times, she assured him she was coping fine.. she longed to ask him if he had heard from Bono, but was scared hearing about him would weaken her resolve to not get in contact with him.
But yet it was her happy time in Ireland that she spent with him and Seamus that kept her going in her moments of dispair, at least she had them, and no one could take them away from her she told herself comfortingly.....
***********************************************************************
Bono had never been one to sit back in his laurels when there was any form of injustice came to his attention.
And right now he was feeling a great personal injustice that Antonia had severed all contact with him.
He only discovered the day he got back to Dublin and had phoned Seamus that Antonia's father had came and took her back to
England, Seamus had told Bono about the picture of them in the gossip magazine and how Antonia had told him to pass on the message that she thought it would be better if Bono didn't try and reach her or see her for a while.
He had been concerned and worried, and not too happy with this request but despite that he felt he had to abide by it and respect her wishes. But as time went by despite the fact his life was more than busy with the band and other things instead of getting easier, and the memory of their time in Ireland fading away, he could not stop thinking about her wanting to see her again.
His friends and fellow bandmembers, tried to get him to take his mind of her, encouraging him to date other women, he made some half hearted attempts, but then he was watching the news on tv, they were discussing the election and he spotted Antonia in the background as they showed her fathers campaign speech.
His attention was totally riveted on the screen, he had wanted to see her face again so much, that even just this little odd glimpse was enough to make him realise his feelings for her were just as strong as ever, she was smiling and clapping, but he could tell it was all for show and false. He had studied her expressions enough when they had been together, and knew where her smile was genuine and when it was just put on for other peoples benefit..
If he thought she was really happy he might have tried harder to just let her go, but realising that might not be the case, he felt a sense of frustration he couldn't be there for her, which was why he got in contact with Seamus a few days later in an attempt to find out how she was doing.
"Tell me truthfully Seamus how do you think she is doing.. is she really happy?" he enquired over the phone.
The pause that followed at Seamus' end of the line, spoke volumes to Bono. "She seems to be coping just fine" Seamus finally replied.
"That's not what I asked" Bono said, determined he was not going to be brushed aside. He heard Seamus sigh at his end of the phone. The Irish man had come to realise himself that Bono's feeling for Antonia was more than just friendship, and he suspected Antonia felt the same way, but he was trying to protect Antonia from anymore upheaval that might send her down the path of self destruction she had took before.
But now he found himself questioning what would be right for her, yes she seem to be coping better now and accepted her role in life.. but was she happy? Not in the proper sense, not in the way Bono was asking.
"I need to see her Seamus" Bono then said, "I have tried my hardest to give her the space she needs and let her decide what she wants, but I seen her on the tv Seamus, even though it was only for a few moments, I could see the sadness in her eyes, the same sadness that was there when I first met her, nothing has really changed has it, her marriage is still a sham and her life is just one big play act, "
"Bono what do you want me to say" Seamus replied in dispair, "I am trying to be there for her, I just don't want to make the situation any worse, I want her to be happy as much as you do, I am not sure how she will react if you come barging into the scene upsetting things"
"Maybe it's what she needs, a wake up call" Bono replied "I could make her see she doesn't have to stay in that life, I could give her an option a choice to escape and get out of it.. I could take care of her Seamus.. you know I would treat her right, I could make her happy"
"Yes..I do know that Bono... but I just don't want to see you doing something rash that you both end up getting hurt and regretting"
Seamus replied in concern
"I think I will regret it more if I don't" Bono stated, "If you had the chance all over again Seamus, would you not take the opportunity to tell Toni's mother Mary, how you really felt about her? how you lost out on the chance of happiness because you didn't." he reminded him "Well I can't do that Seamus I am sorry..please don't deny Toni my love" he then finished quietly
"You are not going to give up are you?" Seamus realised, then after a short paused added resigningly "Well in that case I guess have no choice but to help you"
"Thank you!" Bono exclaimed happily glad his argument had worked, "You will not regret it, I promise"...
*********************************************
The Charity bash was much like every other she had attended, now inside the hotel function room, there was much backslapping and handshaking for her father, Antonia remained in the background smiling exchanging polite conversation with the others in the room quietly supporting her father as duty dictated or as he expected.
Mingling with the guests, her and Gareth naturally went their seperate ways at each end of the room, Antonia counting the hours already when it would be all be over and she could go home and relax and stop all this pretence. Then much to her suprise she glanced at the entrance door and noticed Seamus saunter in dressed in his best suite looking not too comfortable and out of place in his surroundings. He then started scanning the room, she realised he was looking for her,
She was happy to see him, and waved to catch his attention and started to walk over in his direction, still a little surprised he had shown up like this, he was the last person she expected to show.
Seamus had noticed her walking towards her and smiled looking relieved.
"Seamus," she greeted him as they hugged "What are you doing here, I didn't think this was your scene.. why didn't you tell me you were coming?" she demanded happily
"I wanted to suprise you" Seamus smiled, and then he shifted uneasily "The things I do, to surprise you" he murmered
"Well I am really glad you came" Antonia beamed.
"Actually I didn't come alone" Seamus informed her, "I brought someone with me who is really keen to meet you"
He looked around behind him, Antonia followed his gaze, wondering who he meant.
Then she caught sight of Bono, coming through the door, her heart seem to do a somersault in her chest at the sight of him now approaching her smiling a little uncertainly, she was unable to move or speak, but found her eyes locked with his blue ones, reeking havoc with her emotions
"Hi Toni" he spoke up "I thought I would come and join the party".......
**********************
I am writing this chapter to celebrate the fact I finally got my U2 concert tickets for Croke ParK!!
Enjoy!!!!!
