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Old 04-13-2006, 12:16 PM   #76
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These are great! Thanks for mine. I especially like Mofo's!!


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Old 04-13-2006, 12:18 PM   #77
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ignore this, gonna try something else.
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Old 04-13-2006, 12:30 PM   #78
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Lila64

Ray Davies

1968. The Summer of Love. The Kinks kick off their 1968 tour in the SoHo section of New York City. Girls flock to see them and revel in the joy that is the Davies brothers. One lucky girl gets the eye of Ray Davies. After a few hours of small talk and drinks of champaigne, she says, "Won't you come home with me?", and he does. They great their freak on and then slumber in a dreamless, peaceful sleep.

The next morning, singer Ray Davies opens his eyes and says, "Ahhh, now there's a night I won't soon be forgetting. Thank you Lola."

"Lila."

"What?"

"My name. It's Lila. Not Lola. L-I-L-A, Lila."

"Oh...right. Sorry bout that. Anyway, got to go. Playing Boston tomorrow. Bye Lola."

Ray wrote to Lila for many months, but like so many long distance romances, it faltered. Then, one day, in late 1970 a small package arrived. In it was a record and a note. "I told you I'd never forget you. I even wrote a song about you. I think it'll be a hit. Miss you Lola. Love always, Ray."

"Son of a bitch," she said after reading the note. "L-I-L-A, LILA."
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Old 04-13-2006, 12:43 PM   #79
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I need to stop reading this thread or else I'm going to get myself fired
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Old 04-13-2006, 12:56 PM   #80
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Priceless!

I'd love to hear what you have on me. Sign me up!
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Old 04-13-2006, 01:18 PM   #81
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This thread is brilliant!
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Old 04-13-2006, 01:27 PM   #82
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Quote:
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lmjhitman

Agent 47

Larry Mullen Jr has made a lot of people angry in his day. Gambling debts, prostitutes, substances: the line of people waiting to collect runs deep. But now, some people have grown tired of waiting.

In a small Dublin suburb known as Dim O Caugh, Agent 47, a secret assassin works for an unknown source. His mission: Take Out LMJ.

Across town, a second hired gun, LMJHitman, plots her course as she too has money waiting for her should she complete her mission: Take out Larry Mullen jr.

Over the next few weeks LMJHitman and Agent 47 engage in a brilliant game of cat and mouse, as both foil each other's plots by saving Larry from the other, so that they can kill him with their own hands, and collect the money. Stay tuned to see how all of this plays out.


omg! that is so awesome!

this is a cool thread, beav. fer reals.

i can't wait to see impy's!
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Old 04-13-2006, 01:30 PM   #83
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U2MaNaIcWeIdO

Dr. Englebert Wastof Umphries III

Famed scientist Dr. EW Umphries III recently claimed to have broken the molecular structure of the highly dangerous Sodium based compound U2MaNaIcWeIdO.

His findings, to be published next week in the science magazine Nature, claim that the substance, when it comes into contact with the compound CO2LdPL3Ay can lead to a sharp increase in so called "Red Enzymes." "These "red enzymes" he writes, "tend to rush up into the heads of those carriers of the U2MaNaIcWeIdO
compound, causing a rise in blood pressure and a desire to utter things like, 'THEY DON'T SOUND LIKE U2MaNaIcWeIdO and if they do it's because they're ripping them off.'"

Harvard scientist David Jacobs, PhD responds, "It's an interesting theory. I should like to test it further before putting forth an opinion, but it certainly looks promising."

Dr. Umphreys hopes to isolate the U2MaNaIcWeIdO gene in the hopes of perhaps shutting it down completely, he said as his "The Scientist" came up next on his iTunes playlist.
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Old 04-13-2006, 01:37 PM   #84
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Quote:
Originally posted by UberBeaver
U2MaNaIcWeIdO

Dr. Englebert Wastof Umphries III

Famed scientist Dr. EW Umphries III recently claimed to have broken the molecular structure of the highly dangerous Sodium based compound U2MaNaIcWeIdO.

His findings, to be published next week in the science magazine Nature, claim that the substance, when it comes into contact with the compound CO2LdPL3Ay can lead to a sharp increase in so called "Red Enzymes." "These "red enzymes" he writes, "tend to rush up into the heads of those carriers of the U2MaNaIcWeIdO
compound, causing a rise in blood pressure and a desire to utter things like, 'THEY DON'T SOUND LIKE U2MaNaIcWeIdO and if they do it's because they're ripping them off.'"

Harvard scientist David Jacobs, PhD responds, "It's an interesting theory. I should like to test it further before putting forth an opinion, but it certainly looks promising."

Dr. Umphreys hopes to isolate the U2MaNaIcWeIdO gene in the hopes of perhaps shutting it down completely, he said as his "The Scientist" came up next on his iTunes playlist.
I always wanted to be on the periodic table. But seriously.....I'm happy that I cause such a reaction when mixed with anything Coldplay!
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Old 04-13-2006, 01:38 PM   #85
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omg omg omg ahahahahahhahahahathese are way to funny..ahahahahahah!!!!
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Old 04-13-2006, 02:04 PM   #86
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Bono's Baby 12

Johnnie Cochraine

"Ya' Honor. Clearly what we have here is a case of entrapment, extortion if you will, per se. A young, poor, impressional girl gets pregnant. Hey, Happens everyday, some say, it's the American Way, ok? Who are we to judge? Well, cept for you, ya honor. he he. (laughter from the court room.) So here is this young girl, firghtened, confused, saying, "Hey - that fella over there, the one yelling into the microphone about war, he's the father. He got money. He can afford a baby." Was it her idea to say these terrible lies? Who knows. Maybe, maybe not. Don't really matter. Fact is, the baby that was named BonosBaby12 is not my client's baby. Nor is she twelve. Nor is she the twelth child of Mr. Bono. My CLIENT WAS FRAMED. THIS IS LUDICROUS! A travesty of the American justice systems, which is compunded by the irony that my client is Irish, therefore, he cannot be guilty. Thank you."
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Old 04-13-2006, 02:11 PM   #87
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Did I miss anyone?
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Old 04-13-2006, 02:19 PM   #88
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Old 04-13-2006, 02:28 PM   #89
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Chiso

Eric Estrada

In 2005 Vince McMahon decided that he wanted to bring some flair to the WWE. He wanted speed and skill to dovetail with the feats of sheer strength of the more popular WWE wrestlers. He looked to the Latin wrestling leagues and like what he saw.

Eric "Ponch" Estrada was brought in and soon thereafter he beat Kane in a steel cage ladder match. Estrada was such a hit that he was given a manager, Lolita Esperanza De Villa Casa, and a more prominent role on the weekly shows.

After a couple of months McMahon wanted to expand Estrada's role. His first tactic was to bring in Jon, Ponch's old partner on the Cali Highway Patrol, but when it seemed that Jon was horrendously out of shape, and wouldn't make a good foil, McMahon went back to the drawing board.

His scouts reported that a high flying fella named Chiso was lighting up the indy scene, and McMahon went to check him out in Hartford, CT. He signed him on the spot.

Chiso was originally given a small role, but Estrada felt threatened. He began to bad mouth Chiso, saying that the "Latino Verdad" was right "aqui, pendejo. Callate. You make me enfermo. Aye aye aye aye aye." Chiso, never one to back down, ran out and beat Estrada in front of 35k at the Staples Center in Atlanta (?).

Chiso has since gotten his own manager, Jon, and he meets up with Estrada for the Intercontinental Belt on May 1 in Salt City Utah. The world waits with bated breath.

----------------------

Chiso - OK, I have no idea why I think you're Latin, but I do, so, yeah. You get Eric Estrada.
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Old 04-13-2006, 02:33 PM   #90
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Quote:
Originally posted by UberBeaver
Lila64

Ray Davies

1968. The Summer of Love. The Kinks kick off their 1968 tour in the SoHo section of New York City. Girls flock to see them and revel in the joy that is the Davies brothers. One lucky girl gets the eye of Ray Davies. After a few hours of small talk and drinks of champaigne, she says, "Won't you come home with me?", and he does. They great their freak on and then slumber in a dreamless, peaceful sleep.

The next morning, singer Ray Davies opens his eyes and says, "Ahhh, now there's a night I won't soon be forgetting. Thank you Lola."

"Lila."

"What?"

"My name. It's Lila. Not Lola. L-I-L-A, Lila."

"Oh...right. Sorry bout that. Anyway, got to go. Playing Boston tomorrow. Bye Lola."

Ray wrote to Lila for many months, but like so many long distance romances, it faltered. Then, one day, in late 1970 a small package arrived. In it was a record and a note. "I told you I'd never forget you. I even wrote a song about you. I think it'll be a hit. Miss you Lola. Love always, Ray."

"Son of a bitch," she said after reading the note. "L-I-L-A, LILA."



This is sooooooooooooooo Lila!!!!
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