Looneyville, Texas, United States Superthread

[Axver]

I have been doing dole work for the government over the past month, and, remarkably, it's been immensely fun and useful - this is the first and last time the words "dole" and "fun" have been used in the same sentence, so you should really soak it in while you still can! It basically involves illustrating for a bunch of RSPCA books, and they're all about cartoon rabbits. I pretty much just go to a place in the morning, draw critters for eight and a half hours, head home and then draw things I want to draw. What's better, the guys behind it totally know their shit when it comes to publishing, commercial art and advertising - some of them have been in the industry for ages and were rapt with what I'm doing, so I'm currently making a portfolio to send to a bunch of companies for a storyboarding job. I can't believe I might actually get a dream job out of something Centrelink told me to do, that seems awfully counterproductive of them. Anyway, I say this now, if I do indeed get a job at an ad joint, I am sure I will be in here every day complaining about it.

This sounds too good to be true. I don't believe a word of it!

I intend to visit my brother in Hobart right before Christmas, but all the cheapest flights involve ridiculously long stopovers in Melbourne - would anyone be available to drink beers with me and possibly offer a couch on some night between the 18th-20th december?

Sure.

 

[cobl04]

That's SO great Bonnie, keep us in the loop

I can't offer you a couch but I'm super keen for beers!

 

[Axver]

Wait, Bonnie! If you're here on the 18th!

Neon Indian - Friday Nights at NGV | NGV

!!!

 

[The Sad Punk]

Oh my shit yes!!!

Is this a date, guys? Brews in town, The Great SynthGod of Palomia, more brews in town, a very hungover Bonnie enduring a flight across the bass strait and then rocking up in the Hobart hinterlands with nil regrets? Is that the trajectory? Let's MAKE IT THE THING.

 

[cobl04]

neon indian 18 dec?!??!?! count me le fuck in!!!!

 

[cobl04]

i cant fucking believe how cheap it is. do you reckon theyll check if i get a childs ticket? surely not. they never do.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Hell yes! Kid ticket it, man. They don't check at Atown oval when you bringing in a sixpack of Dr Tims, they won't check it at an art gallery where nobody gives a shit. What's the worse that can happen, anyway? Slap on the wrist? Permanent exile? Take the risk!

Alternatively, don't, as I am a fountain of bad advice.

 

[cobl04]

done. did u get kids tickets?

 

[The Sad Punk]

Just lookin' at flights right now to make sure. I am tossing up on kid tix, on one hand it's a great idea, on the other hand I would happily pay every cent I've ever earned to see the great man perform in the best state gallery in the country, so a few extra bits of dosh isn't much of a problem for me. Boy, I'm glad my family started doing really tardy Secret Santas a few years ago, otherwise I'd never be able to afford this.

 

[liamcool]

Twelve bucks is stupid cheap.

 

[Axver]

I am SO FUCKING IN.

I am also way too honest and I bought the adult ticket.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Who even brings children to gigs? I mean geez, are the only drinks gonna be fruit boxes?

Hang on, I wouldn't mind that at all.

 

[Axver]

Haha I've seen kids at gigs, but only ever at like free events.

I must be a real adult now. I've had to pay back some of my HECS and I don't get concession shit any more. Booooooo.

(I still launch paper planes out my office window.)

 

[Axver]

Oh and don't forget those crazies who take their kid to U2 to get on stage.

 

[cobl04]

$12 is insanity. A US-level price for fucking once.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Alright! I'm gonna buy the tickets tomorrow (I don't trust myself at this hour), but it's all go.

Man, it's not even 10, I'm still in a food coma from the ridiculously good Shanghai pork belly that my roommate's mum cooked for tea, I don't feel like sleepin' yet but I'm too tired to do a thing. Anyone mind if I get out some vintage muscat I've been saving for a Tuesday?

 

[cobl04]

I don't know what that is but I'm up, drinking American Honey and Pepsi, paying my 700th fine of the week.

My girlfriend made me eat her fav meal recently, chilli caramel pulled pork. I lost a bet.

 

[The Sad Punk]

Oh, nice. Reminds me I got a parking fine yesterday, that is a thing of frustration.

I don't think I've had that - I'm not really someone who normally enjoys pork in its pulled or belly forms, to be honest. So I was crazy surprised when I tried this... I already forgot the Mandarin name, but it literally means "red long and slow cooked meat" in far fewer syllables, and it was so tasty.

Still a dude of beer and dry reds, but not too long ago I was down at my parents place and was invited to a sesh with their next door neighbours. They had barrels full of port older than me. It was probably also worth more than me. I couldn't believe how good it tasted. The complexity was staggering, like the smoothest and strongest brown liquors, but it had all that tooth-smashing sweetness that you get from a goodass $8 bottle of tawny, but in more delicate layers. This $25 bottle of aged muscat is the best I can do on my meagre budget to replicate that kablammo of grape wizardry (real winetasting term).

 

[Axver]

Alright! I'm gonna buy the tickets tomorrow (I don't trust myself at this hour), but it's all go.

Man, it's not even 10, I'm still in a food coma from the ridiculously good Shanghai pork belly that my roommate's mum cooked for tea, I don't feel like sleepin' yet but I'm too tired to do a thing. Anyone mind if I get out some vintage muscat I've been saving for a Tuesday?

This will be super awesome.

I wish I had some muscat. I was just out having a few beers, but now I'm thinking I should go for a run because I haven't in a few days. Should I?

chilli caramel pulled pork

This sounds delicious.

 

[cobl04]

Port YUCK

Also, it was pork belly, not pulled pork. It was quite delicious.

 

[Axver]

Still a dude of beer and dry reds, but not too long ago I was down at my parents place and was invited to a sesh with their next door neighbours. They had barrels full of port older than me. It was probably also worth more than me. I couldn't believe how good it tasted. The complexity was staggering, like the smoothest and strongest brown liquors, but it had all that tooth-smashing sweetness that you get from a goodass $8 bottle of tawny, but in more delicate layers. This $25 bottle of aged muscat is the best I can do on my meagre budget to replicate that kablammo of grape wizardry (real winetasting term).

This reminds me of how I got the pompous bastard nickname. Though now I'm rocking the vocal parasite and insufferable wanker thing instead.

I keep being tempted to drop way too much money on a good port for basically the reasons you describe. It's surely the most luxurious alcoholic drink. I feel a million bucks just drinking it. Like, sure, there are things like cognac, but port is special.

 

[Axver]

Port YUCK

Why do you keep failing at life.

 

[The Sad Punk]

He probably thinks we're talking about the Gard Sard. You know this kid, he crazy cobblin'.

Do you mean like, go for a run as in the exercising, or going for a run out to your nearest purveyor of alcoholic provisions and joining me? Or some sorta mad combination of the two? They are all good options!

 

[Axver]

He probably thinks we're talking about the Gard Sard. You know this kid, he crazy cobblin'.

This is the only acceptable excuse.

Do you mean like, go for a run as in the exercising, or going for a run out to your nearest purveyor of alcoholic provisions and joining me? Or some sorta mad combination of the two? They are all good options!

A mad combination of the two would be great, but I'm afraid I mean the former. I've been trying to run this little 2.5km block most days. I was sick over the weekend though so I've only been for one run in the last five days and I'm annoyed at myself. On the other hand running while tipsy at 11pm may not be the most advisable thing I've ever done.

 

[cobl04]

It's surely the most luxurious alcoholic drink

yeahhh righto mate. tell that to the salted caramel baileys i was drinkin last night

 

[Axver]

yeahhh righto mate. tell that to the salted caramel baileys i was drinkin last night

You just keep digging that hole Cobbler.

(...I would enjoy a glass of that though.)

 

[liamcool]

I'd murder a fucker for salted caramel Bailey's.

Even one of you fuckers.

 

[Axver]

Fuck it this run's happening. I don't want to be annoyed with myself in the morning.

Whisky may happen afterwards though.

 

[The Sad Punk]

JEEEEEZ, this is something. Fucking melted golden syrup, holy shit. This is not a thing you wanna make into Your Thing. But it is so damn good. Tastes like Christmas heaven.

This leads up to a thing. I've always been really mad for history, but it's only been this year that I've bothered to read much on British history beyond the sheer basics, because I know that for the past 500 years it's just been constant pure evil and I find it easier to just see it as some mass of empirical terror, colonialism and tricornes rather than bother to get to know any of the figures that well. So I've been reading up on my monarchy lately and most of it really isn't my scene, I mean when I'm on the Tudors and Plagaennenenenets I'm like gross, and 1066 more like 106sux and the Crusades are the most meaningless things to have ever happened and Victoria has a lameass corner of the universe named after her (Queensland) but HOO FUCKING BOY I love The Prince Regent. I mean, he was probably the most ridiculous guy ever. Complete asshole, and that's why he's so great. Normally you're reading about a great man of the time like Voltaire or Rousseau or Byron and then you find a little citation in the corner like, PS, this guy was a sexist and racist because of the times, you just gotta live with the fact that a dude could be such a fucking dickhead and also have a great idea, but the Prince Regent had absolutely NO good ideas and that's what makes him tremendously wonderful. I mean a lot of British royals have become infamous because of their debauchery and extravagance - Henry VIII, Charles II, Elizabeth II - but The Goddamn Regent just served them up in a gold encrusted pie and ate the shit out of those nerds, cause he could do that, and built stupid fantasy ass Orientalist disasterpiece palaces while at it. Also, he drank, like, several bottles of port every day before he even got out of bed. Can you even imagine???? And he was completely hepped up on opiates for like his entire reign as King of the biggest empire in the world. Oh gosh. I love history.

 

[The Sad Punk]

The die is cast, it's only going to go downhill from here.