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Old 08-06-2009, 09:10 PM   #931
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Taken seems like a movie I won't mind watching when it's on cable, just to watch Neeson threaten, beat and kill people.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:14 PM   #932
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Didn't I do a parody of his telephone speech to the kidnappers not too long ago, something about your douchebag seats?
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:14 PM   #933
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Plus the idea of following Shuttlecock around Europe would bring back nice memories for you. And the idea of you being abducted while doing so would bring back nice fantasies for everyone else.


And yeah, you did, Laz. It was also about doing something vaguely Jewish to somebody.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:16 PM   #934
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Didn't I do a parody of his telephone speech to the kidnappers not too long ago, something about your douchebag seats?
Was it while I was on hiatus?

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And the idea of you being abducted while doing so would bring back nice fantasies for everyone else.








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Old 08-06-2009, 09:18 PM   #935
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Was it while I was on hiatus?
Sadly, yes.

Here it is:

Grizzly Bear - 'Veckatimest' - May 26
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:20 PM   #936
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Glad you found it. I only managed to dig up this, which stemmed from my "Lance's Mom never had a DP behave like this" comment:

Quote:
Lance's Mom: Am I going to walk around and rip your fucking heels off, in the middle of a trick? Then why the fuck are you walking right through? Ah-da-da-da, like this in the background. What the fuck is it with you? What don't you fucking understand? You got any fucking idea about, hey, it's fucking distracting having somebody walking up behind Dalton in the middle of a ream? Give me a fucking answer! What don't you get about it?

Sheila Twirlbutt, other prostitute: I was looking for a condom.

Lance's Mom: Ohhhhh, goooood for you. And how was it? I hope it was fucking good, because it's useless now, isn't it?

Twirlbutt: OK.

Lance's Mom: Fuck's sake woman, you're amateur. NSW, you got fucking something to say to this bitch?

No Spoken Words a.k.a. "NSW", pimp: I didn't see it happen.

Lance's Mom: Well, somebody should be fucking watching and keeping an eye on her.

NSW: Fair enough.

Lance's Mom: It's the second time that she doesn't give a fuck about what is going on in my bed, all right? I'm trying to fucking turn a trick here, and I am going "Why the fuck is Sheila walking in there? What is she doing there?" Do you understand my mind is not on the John if you're doing that?

Twirlbutt: I absolutely apologise. I'm sorry, I did not mean anything by it.

Lance's Mom: Stay out of my fucking room bitch. For fuck's sake. Alright, let's go again.

Dalton: I might need a minute.

Lance's Mom: Let's not take a fucking minute, let's go again.

(inaudible)

Lance's Mom: I'm going to fucking kick your fucking ass if you don't shut up for a second! All right?

Unknown voices: Lance's Mom, it's cool.

Lance's Mom: I'm going to go... Do you want me to fucking go trash your room?
Do you want me to fucking trash it? Then why are you trashing my trick?

Twirlbutt: I'm not trying to trash your trick.

Lance's Mom: You are trashing my trick!

Twirlbutt: Lance's Mom, I was only...

Lance's Mom: You do it one more fucking time and I ain't working in this brothel if you're still hired. I'm fucking serious. You're a nice girl. You're a nice girl, but that don't fucking cut it when you're fucking around like this in-house.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:23 PM   #937
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Was that me?






:falsemodesty:
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:36 PM   #938
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Fair enough.

Both are funny, though, to be honest, the Taken thing made me laugh more.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:38 PM   #939
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I think it's funnier as well.

The Bale rant parody isn't as consistent.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:40 PM   #940
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Well, to be fair, it's easier to be consistent over such a shorter piece. They're both great, although Bangs of New York may be your magnum opus.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:43 PM   #941
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Bangs of New York was pretty fucking funny.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:47 PM   #942
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So can we start casting Hot Rice? Like nowish?
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:48 PM   #943
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So can we start casting Hot Rice? Like nowish?
Not without Lance and YLB lurking about.

It needs its own thread, too.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:48 PM   #944
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Lance is probably the authority on the subject, so that's for the best.
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Old 08-06-2009, 09:52 PM   #945
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Lance is probably the authority on the subject, so that's for the best.
We definitely want this film to be poignant and hard hitting, raw....but it needs to be a sensual journey, too.

Do we even know the plot? Are we rolling with his dream, or should it be about Laz having the dream and trying to go ahead and actually make a film called Hot Rice, against the backdrop of sprawling, hard-luck LA. He'll have to cope with budget issues, diva-like attitude from no-name actors and actresses, a producer with only profit on his/her mind, all while avoiding getting a DUI.
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