Originally Posted by lazarus
I know it's no Bangs of New York, but I feel this should be reprinted here, for posterity.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the official transcript:
Lance's Mom: Am I going to walk around and rip your fucking heels off, in the middle of a trick? Then why the fuck are you walking right through? Ah-da-da-da, like this in the background. What the fuck is it with you? What don't you fucking understand? You got any fucking idea about, hey, it's fucking distracting having somebody walking up behind Dalton in the middle of a ream? Give me a fucking answer! What don't you get about it?
Sheila Twirlbutt, other prostitute: I was looking for a condom.
Lance's Mom: Ohhhhh, goooood for you. And how was it? I hope it was fucking good, because it's useless now, isn't it?
Lance's Mom: Fuck's sake woman, you're amateur. NSW, you got fucking something to say to this bitch?
No Spoken Words a.k.a. "NSW", pimp: I didn't see it happen.
Lance's Mom: Well, somebody should be fucking watching and keeping an eye on her.
NSW: Fair enough.
Lance's Mom: It's the second time that she doesn't give a fuck about what is going on in my bed, all right? I'm trying to fucking turn a trick here, and I am going "Why the fuck is Sheila walking in there? What is she doing there?" Do you understand my mind is not on the John if you're doing that?
Twirlbutt: I absolutely apologise. I'm sorry, I did not mean anything by it.
Lance's Mom: Stay out of my fucking room bitch. For fuck's sake. Alright, let's go again.
Dalton: I might need a minute.
Lance's Mom: Let's not take a fucking minute, let's go again.
Lance's Mom: I'm going to fucking kick your fucking ass if you don't shut up for a second! All right?
Unknown voices: Lance's Mom, it's cool.
Lance's Mom: I'm going to go... Do you want me to fucking go trash your room?
Do you want me to fucking trash it? Then why are you trashing my trick?
Twirlbutt: I'm not trying to trash your trick.
Lance's Mom: You are trashing my trick!
Twirlbutt: Lance's Mom, I was only...
Lance's Mom: You do it one more fucking time and I ain't working in this brothel if you're still hired. I'm fucking serious. You're a nice girl. You're a nice girl, but that don't fucking cut it when you're fucking around like this in-house.