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Old 08-17-2001, 06:03 PM   #16
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deep thoughts? ...hmm....err...I'm 22, a female, and single. And what with that comment about you getting a job...well, I'm definitely impressed.

....teasin...

-sula
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Old 08-17-2001, 06:37 PM   #17
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ever heard of a good friend (with benefits of course)?
compliment is a better word than complete. forgive me if some1 said this, I havne't reasd the replies..

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Old 08-18-2001, 03:22 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally posted by martha:
it's the echo of God in us.


WOW. I like that!

You know whats really tough though, and I speak for myself ONLY. Its KNOWING what it takes to be in a healthy relationship. Knowing what it takes to be "whole". Knowing that I am NOWHERE close to that! And knowing then, that as a responsible Christian man, I MUST wait... Learn, grow, change... and WAIT.
And anything I feel now is NOT honest, or healthy, but in fact selfish and needy (...and lets not forget, "lustful"!).
I want a relationship for the wrong reasons, and DAMMIT, unfortunately, I know better... That sucks, my friends. It sucks.

As for "filling the hole", I know too well that only God can fill it. I'm fillin' it!

...whewwwwwwwwwwwww.. I feel a lil better.

Therapy online!
Oh well, as long as you all don't know who I am and how to find me (Quiet Linky!), I guess its ok to "Share" like this.

Anymore "Deep Thoughts"???
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Old 08-18-2001, 12:30 PM   #19
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... Sula, don't EVEN play that that friendgirl!!

Geezzz, 22 years old? I have socks older than you! OMG, I have a neice your age!

"What a drag, it is, gettin' old..."

Nikki, yes of course I have heard of "a good friend". A have a few of those, thank God.
I have "forced" myself to seek fellowship and friendship. I know that it IS important.

... BUT, I still want Wynona Rider!... Is that a bad thing???

Seriously, I AM trying to figure out WHY I "want" or "need" someone, more than just a "good friend". Is it for the sex? Is that a bad reason? Is it for the closeness, love, and intimacy one can only find in a person one falls asleep in the arms of and wakes up with every morning.

...I don't have friends that are THAT "good" to me!
I'm kiddin'. Sorry

OH! And "compliment" IS a very good way of putting it! "Good answer! Good answer!"


Peace.


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Old 08-18-2001, 12:55 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally posted by Like O2:
I do think that God wants us to find someone. Genesis, 2:18 The Lord God said: It is not good for the man to be alone. 2:24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them become one body.
If the focus is on being selfish or needing to care for someone, perhaps you overlook the idea that God wants us to cling to another.
[This message has been edited by Like O2 (edited 08-17-2001).]
I have to disagree with you on some points, Like O2 (and I don't think happens much between us, does it?)
I don't necessarily think that God wants everyone of us to find someone. I think we all need other people, but not ncessarily a spouse. I, for one, know that I am not built for a romantic relationship. And I'm 34 years old, so I am pretty confident about that by now. Don't forget that Paul told us several times that it is better that a person be single, because that way his attention can be completely on God, whereas a married person's attention is divided, he must focus on his spouse, also.


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Old 08-18-2001, 01:14 PM   #21
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Wait a sec.

If God is love, doesn't loving somebody so deeply as you love your mate/spouse bring you closer to God?

Just my athe­ïst €0,02
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Old 08-18-2001, 02:22 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by Trash Can:

by the way, I just learned that I got a job that I was after.
Monday morning, I'm a taxpaying American again!


Maybe you'll meet the future Mrs. Trash Can at your new job!!

Congrats and have a great first day!!


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Old 08-18-2001, 02:33 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally posted by DrTeeth:
Wait a sec.
If God is love, doesn't loving somebody so deeply as you love your mate/spouse bring you closer to God?
Just my athe­ïst €0,02
Maybe it should, but it doesn't always work that way. My point is that not everyone is meant to have someone, and that Paul tells us that if we aren't "burning with desire", it is best not to be married. There's nothing wrong with having someone, but at the same time, there's nothing wrong with not having someone.


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Old 08-19-2001, 01:26 AM   #24
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Quote:
Originally posted by martha:
Like O2, you give good advice. (Bunions, remember?)

Of course I remember, I still think you have one of the best sigs on interference. BTW, gonna have the surgery??


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Old 08-19-2001, 02:25 AM   #25
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Thinkin' about it. I'll see my doc next Friday. If I do it, and I'm leaning toward that, I'll have to wait until next summer when I'm off.

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Old 08-19-2001, 02:42 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally posted by 80sU2isBest:
I have to disagree with you on some points, Like O2 (and I don't think happens much between us, does it?)
I don't necessarily think that God wants everyone of us to find someone. I think we all need other people, but not ncessarily a spouse. I, for one, know that I am not built for a romantic relationship. And I'm 34 years old, so I am pretty confident about that by now.

80's, I've just realized what the problem is for you and Trash Can....you both live in the wrong city. I think it's time for you both to move a bit further South in the state, where we women know how to take care of our men!

Everyone just settle down, I'm kiddin'! Actually, there's a chance that my family may be moving to your neck of the woods, so I better behave myself.

Seriously, 80's your right and I should have been more clear....I don't think that EVERYONE is meant to be married. And I do not know you or Trash Can so I can not/will not presume I do and make statements based on that presumption. However, *nervous gulp* I wonder if both of you aren't "copping out" a bit.

To say that you aren't "built" for a romantic relationship sounds so extreme. What about that "friend girl" who you spent your birthday with? A romantic relationship might be alot of hard work, focus, effort...but I bet it could be "for you" if you wanted it to be. And you might not want that and that's okay too. But if you do, I but you could.

And Trash, how will you know when you have waited long enough, when you are WHOLE? Is there some test I missed before I said "I do"? You've mentioned selfish a couple of times, I just have a tough time seeing you this way based on how you respond to other people....selfish is one of the last words I'd pick to describe you.

However, I should point out that the hour is late and there is a good chance I have no idea what I'm talking about. The three of us can meet at some bar after a 3rd Leg U2 concert and solve the problems of the world then.



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Old 08-20-2001, 07:51 PM   #27
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Bunions... and Finding a mate. Do the two go together???

Anyway. Claire: I am selfish. I'm also giving... but not as much as I should be. Friendgirl, you don't know me. What you read here is mostly me in my "best behaviour".
Seriously, I've got some growing up to do before I can seriously consider a mate.
By the way, there is a very sexy woman at my new job. She is intelligent (BIG turn on). She's funny, warm and sweet. She has a great smile, sparkling eyes, and... well... she's slender and ... she has a nice bod.
I've met several of women that fit this "type" and I always find them quite attractive, but there's always the same problem.
What's the problem? You say.

She's a lesbian.



My line of work attracts many gay women ( I dont know why).
Boy... I need to find ANOTHER type to be attracted to. I DON'T stand a chance like this.

Oh, About "coping out"... Ok, sure. It's scarey and I know I have fear of commitement.
But I also know I would cause the one I would "love" much pain with my immature behaviour.


... I working on it! Ok, Claire???

As far as scripture... What timing, recent scripture in Church dealt with relationships. I forget what Gospel it it, but its when Jesus gets asked about divorce and He talks about when a man and a woman become one. And also about the fact that some people are meant never to marry, and remain celebate!

Ok, I have to go... Mr. Kinko is making a fortune off of me.

Peace... and love.
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Old 08-21-2001, 01:50 AM   #28
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There are many goodlooking, single women where I work. Too bad they all hate my sorry ass and won't have anything to do with me. But yeah, a significant other would be a good thing to have.

Wait, what was the question?
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Old 08-21-2001, 01:56 AM   #29
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Quote:
Originally posted by Trash Can:
Bunions... and Finding a mate. Do the two go together???


Wait until you've been married 12 years....you'll be amazed my friend, AMAZED!!



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Old 08-21-2001, 09:23 AM   #30
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Love is incredibly complicated, especially when you start adding the Christian dimension into it. I don't even want to get started on that.

But true love is never wrong. There's a passage in Romans that says that as well, that 'love is the fulfillment of the Law.' It's obvious that the definition of what constitutes true love has changed since Biblical times--hence, a lot of sometimes nonsensical prohibitions they saw as being contrary to love--but if you honestly have love in your mind and heart when doing anything, how can it be wrong?

Melon

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