MrsSpringsteen
Blue Crack Addict
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9880537/site/newsweek/
interesting about men vs women...also maybe men are conditioned to cover up their worrying tendencies because they're taught it's not "manly" or something. I have to agree in general that most women are more empathetic and "ruminate" more.
"Are you born a worrier or is worrying created by the way you are raised?
There are several factors. One is temperamental, in terms of being easily aroused, having a fear of novelty, inhibition. Those are built-in predispositions. The other thing is anxiety sensitivity. Some people are more sensitive to their anxious arousal. They think it is a sign of going out of control, that there’s something terribly wrong with them. This anxiety sensitivity seems to be a general trait that is actually more characteristic of people who have anxiety disorders and who worry.
In terms of child-rearing experiences, there is no one pattern that is characteristic of all worriers, but what we do see is that worriers when they were kids had been more involved in what’s called reverse parenting. In other words, their mother or father--[but] primarily the mother--would present the child with their problems. The child would try to take care of the mother or try to make peace between the mother and the father or do other things that a parent would do. The child who becomes a worrier is sort of taught that you’ve got to take care of other people’s feelings, other people’s needs. The consequence of that is that there’s nobody taking care of you and you’re always thinking about how other people feel. So reverse parenting is one factor. Another is that parents of worriers are overprotective. They are always presenting the child with dangers and trying to confine the child’s freedom. The message is that the world is dangerous, you have to always anticipate the worst ... Kids growing up with these overprotective parents don’t learn that they can take care of themselves. The other thing is that parents of worriers who are overprotective are not warm. So the child is taught that the world is dangerous, but don’t come to [them] for help. Of course, worriers have worried mothers so they probably imitate that style, too. "
interesting about men vs women...also maybe men are conditioned to cover up their worrying tendencies because they're taught it's not "manly" or something. I have to agree in general that most women are more empathetic and "ruminate" more.
"Are you born a worrier or is worrying created by the way you are raised?
There are several factors. One is temperamental, in terms of being easily aroused, having a fear of novelty, inhibition. Those are built-in predispositions. The other thing is anxiety sensitivity. Some people are more sensitive to their anxious arousal. They think it is a sign of going out of control, that there’s something terribly wrong with them. This anxiety sensitivity seems to be a general trait that is actually more characteristic of people who have anxiety disorders and who worry.
In terms of child-rearing experiences, there is no one pattern that is characteristic of all worriers, but what we do see is that worriers when they were kids had been more involved in what’s called reverse parenting. In other words, their mother or father--[but] primarily the mother--would present the child with their problems. The child would try to take care of the mother or try to make peace between the mother and the father or do other things that a parent would do. The child who becomes a worrier is sort of taught that you’ve got to take care of other people’s feelings, other people’s needs. The consequence of that is that there’s nobody taking care of you and you’re always thinking about how other people feel. So reverse parenting is one factor. Another is that parents of worriers are overprotective. They are always presenting the child with dangers and trying to confine the child’s freedom. The message is that the world is dangerous, you have to always anticipate the worst ... Kids growing up with these overprotective parents don’t learn that they can take care of themselves. The other thing is that parents of worriers who are overprotective are not warm. So the child is taught that the world is dangerous, but don’t come to [them] for help. Of course, worriers have worried mothers so they probably imitate that style, too. "
I'm sure worry is probably caused by a combination of many things, though--nutrition, allergies, external conditions, childhood fears that were never resolved, etc.
