Allow me to elaborate further, as I really have thought this out a lot over the years...
Humans--gay, straight, male, female, black, white, young, old, etc.--are constantly inundated with cultural constructs as to what you are *supposed* to be; hence, stereotypes. We hate stereotypes; we'll march up and down, left and right, and scream at the top of our lungs as to how much we hate them. Yet, what has happened? I see so many walking stereotypes that it makes me sick.
The stereotype, in essence, formulates how we think we are supposed to be as we are growing up. Right now, I'm sure we all have preconceived notions of what we are supposed to be at certain ages (i.e., "A middle-aged father who is not supposed to be affectionate to his children; that's the mother's job"), not to mention revisionist stereotypes of what was ("I want to look '80s,' so I'm going to dye my hair blonde"). Sadly enough, *much* (but not all) of humanity has a very hard time shaking these preconceived notions, most of which we pick up from the media.
Let's look at classic films, for instance. You have a 2 hour film. What happens in it? You have your strong, stoic male who is in control of everything and everyone around him at all times. Sure, during the plot twists, he might stumble, but, by the end, he's got even more power under his belt. Then you meet the woman--thin, beautiful, dumb, and clueless--she is literally lost without the strong male influence.
So what is the progression of the classic film romance (which still persists today)? Man meets woman. She's a bit sassy and resistant, but in a teasing fashion. Man *persists.* She's still sassy, but she puts up less resistance. Man *persists.* She's annoyed, but, suddenly, she's kissing him. Man *persists.* By the end of the film, he's having sex with her, living happily ever after, all of which is in a two-hour time frame. It is that *persistance* that is the problem. In film, *no* rarely ever means *no.* It really turns into *yes.*
To make this argument applicable to z edge's incident, the gay guy is living off that misogynist male film hero stereotype, but translating it to a gay scenario. Add that to the stereotype that gay men are all about hedonistic sex and endless partying--in essence, nothing serious and stable--and he is buying into that as well. Everything from the "straight jocks," "locker room," etc. is him living out stereotypical fantasies.
My overall belief is that stereotypes are just that in the beginning--a general falsehood riddled with bigotry. However, the longer the stereotype exists, the more that generations grow up thinking that that is what they *have to* be. Gays, in particular, are in a very dreadful situation societally. No positive media role models. Little family and societal support. Surrounded by hostility, effeminate stereotypes, lush stereotypes, etc. The same is with minorities: blacks and Mexicans with gang and ghetto stereotypes. Yet, look at rap music? Supposed "positive role models" who fulfill every last stereotype in their personas to, supposedly, "be real."
You know all the stereotypes, really, and, sadly, I fear we are losing generations of otherwise wonderful people to deep-seated bigotry that most of us, unless we ever do the research, will never know *why* these stereotypes ever came about. Instead, we will, blindly, accept them as to what we are supposed to be.
Do I make any sense?
Melon
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"Still, I never understood the elevation of greed as a political credo. Why would anyone want to base a political programme on bottomless dissatisfaction and the impossibility of happiness? Perhaps that was its appeal: the promise of luxury that in fact promoted endless work." - Hanif Kureishi, Intimacy
