The Social Phenomenon Of "Stupid Girls"

[dazzlingamy]

I dont think it should matter what kind of clothes a girl is wearing. I don't sutomatically think some girl in a tight tshirt tight skirt and fishnets is a "slut" or gagging for it or anything, its just an expression of who she is.

And secondly, what is wrong with being a "slut" anyway. This arcaic belief that women shouldn't be promiscious or enjoy sex or anything like that was made up by men trying to shame women into being subservient!

What i am most worried about is not what girls wear, but the fact that we as a society think that men are only interested in "stupid girls" As i said im my last post i dont think this is the case, and frankly, ANY guy that would take paris hilton over say natalie portman or some college graudate, is not the guy for them!!! There are PLENTY of guys out there, geeky guys, smart guys, sexy wonderful loving guys, who want a woman with BRAINS. Its just the idiots of society like paris and jessica and nicole that make people think OMG THEY HAV EIT SOOOO GOOD! I want to be like that!!!

Well not really. Paris is a porn star, used for her fame and can't keep hold of a guy, Nicole is almost dead due to her "oh ive always been skinny BULLSHIT' and on off on off with that DJ guy, no happy parties here and Jessica coming from some molested daddy background is now a divorcee, with a mulit million dollar lawsuit on her hands and is heading down the same road as paris with hooking up with any retarded jackass tattoo no talent hack.

I just think we make too much of these people when we need to look past the money and the partying and see them for the sad human beings that are. Maybe we need to explain this to our teenager/pre pubescent girls, let them see the harsh reality?

 

[Liesje]

I am not discounting peer pressure. It can be horrific. But it all starts at home. If mom and dad don't care about their daughter, she won't care about herself and will be buffetted by every trend that comes along. If mom and dad raise their daughter in a positive, loving environment and teach her that she is a valued, intelligent, lovable human being, she should be better able to withstand peer pressure.

I agree. I truly believe that some people can be conditioned to be immune to negative peer pressure. I was raised to be responsible, independent, and intelligent and I've never, ever had a problem with peer pressure. My parents are hardworking, respectful people and from a very young age I learned that it wasn't worth it to surround yourself with people who have no respect for themselves or others. My parents and I have never really been close, but it was important to me that they approved of my friends and trusted my judgment. I never had any rules or curfews because I earned the respect and trust of my parents and valued that throughout middle school and high school.

I get a little annoyed with everyone constantly moaning about how it's the media's fault some young women behave the way they do. Doesn't that just make women sound even more stupid and vulnerable? Like we're admitting that our self-image is wrapped up in what we're spoon fed from the media? I didn't grow up in a bubble - I went to a fairly large high school with a fairly large population of rich brats, I liked shopping at trendy stores, I watched MTV, and I read Comso and Seventeen just like most teen girls - but the thought of those forms of entertainment actually influencing how I feel about myself and others makes me snicker.

 

[Tania]

I think you missed my point LivLuv. I don't believe the Media are at fault, I just pointed out that the media will focus on only one aspect of a person, which usually is looks because looks sell.

It is interesting to note how U2 are very good manipulators of their fans. How many of us have more than one copy of a single, album whatever because it came out with that version of this song as a B side or was a different colour etc. Maybe we are all "stupid girls" for our own particular weaknesses.

 

[maycocksean]

I shared parts of this thread with my 7th & 8th grade class (all six students in the class are girls) and they came up with a list of five young women who aren't "stupid girls"

Pink
Avril Lavigne
Gwen Stefani
Maria Sharapova
Nicky Hilton

So there it is, from the front lines. Are my students rising above the stupid girl phenomenom or being unknowingly sucked in by it?

Curious to know what you think.

 

[corianderstem]

Nicky Hilton is not a "stupid girl"?

I'm dying to know why they think she isn't. Just because she has a clothing line doesn't mean she's not just another celebrity who's famous for just being famous.

I mean, Paris Hilton has her own perfume line, but that doesn't make her any less ... well, any less Paris Hilton.

 

[yolland]

I think it's funny that she disses on people who use an "image" to sell themselves and yet she herself is selling the image of the "outcast" "anti-popular" person fighting against the in-crowd to appeal to people like that. Pretty hypocritical. It's like, I dunno, gothic people or whatever who call everyone conformists while they follow their own little sub-culture of similarity.

I had the same thought. I wouldn't rule out the possibility that there's some genuine feminist attitude there, but it also sounds like there's a lot of garden-variety teenage patting oneself on the back for belonging to the "right" crowd.

I was raised to be responsible, independent, and intelligent and I've never, ever had a problem with peer pressure.

I didn't grow up in a bubble - I went to a fairly large high school with a fairly large population of rich brats, I liked shopping at trendy stores, I watched MTV, and I read Comso and Seventeen just like most teen girls - but the thought of those forms of entertainment actually influencing how I feel about myself and others makes me snicker.

I do think responsibility is really key--one of the best things you can do for your children, male or female, is to raise them to feel accountable for doing something more with their lives than being well-liked and successful in school. Just so long as that's not done in soccer-mom-culture fashion, where it takes the form of a dutiful series of notches in your belt designed more to please mom and dad than anything else. It could be a sport, a job, a youth group, an instrument, a charity--whatever, just so long as it encourages the kind of emotional independence you get from having a project and a purpose all your own.

And you're right, a certain amount of conformity is normal for teenagers, and all part of the process of graduating from social dependence on your family. A little bit of superficial emulation is no big deal, so long as it doesn't become top priority. The problem, I think, is that so many girls' (and womens') self-esteem revolves far too closely around how appealing they (think they) are to others, particularly men. It's normal and healthy to have some self-awareness about how you come across, but not to the extreme of constantly needing attention and approval because without it you think you're worthless. You can't "just be yourself" if you're thinking only in terms of who others might want you to be; that's really the essence of "stupid."

 

[maycocksean]

Nicky Hilton is not a "stupid girl"?

I'm dying to know why they think she isn't. Just because she has a clothing line doesn't mean she's not just another celebrity who's famous for just being famous.

I mean, Paris Hilton has her own perfume line, but that doesn't make her any less ... well, any less Paris Hilton.

Yeah, I had my doubts about that one too, but rather than respond to your comment myself, I'll wait till tomorrow and share your response with the girls and see what they say!

 

[maycocksean]

Speaking for myself for a moment here. . .

I've always wanted to be with a woman with brains, and I am fortunate to be married to a very smart AND sexy woman. I know there are men out there who like the "stupid" girl and I think that has a lot to do with what those men have been taught (by their parents, peers, society, whatever) to value and find attractive.

For me the "stupid girls" described on this thread--the Paris Hiltons, the Jessicas etc--are not attractive to me at all. Not even on the "purely" physical level.

 

[maycocksean]

from my 7th/8th grade students

Nicky Hilton is not a "stupid girl"?

I'm dying to know why they think she isn't. Just because she has a clothing line doesn't mean she's not just another celebrity who's famous for just being famous.

I mean, Paris Hilton has her own perfume line, but that doesn't make her any less ... well, any less Paris Hilton.

My girls respond: "At least she's actually doing something instead of making a porno like her sister. Paris and Nicky were both famous ever since birth, but Paris became more famous than Nicky because of the video."

They came up with some more names listed below:

Ciara
Skye Sweetnam
Jessica Alba
Liah
Mandy Moore
Yolanda Adams
Miah Hamm

I asked the students to think about this. Why is it that when asked to come up with succuessful young women they mostly think of models, actresses, and singers.

But then again: Can you think of many successful and famous young men who aren't singers or actors (or models).

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

Re: from my 7th/8th grade students

Why is it that when asked to come up with succuessful young women they mostly think of models, actresses, and singers.

Maybe because the media focuses on this as an achievement for girls/young women far more than it does for academic or other types of achievement. Also true for boys/young men but not to the extent that it is for girls.

The "stupid girl" act seems to be working for Kellie Pickler on American Idol-even when she admits she butchered a song, she survives. Or maybe people just appreciated her honesty about that.