When I was 14, I went to visit my aunt's German relatives for the first time. They have a house on the Jersey shore, about 50 miles north of Atlantic City. The day after I had been given a crash course in how to swim in the ocean, I went for a walk with my parents along the shore. I had never even seen the Ocean before this and considered my self a strong swimmer, having spent many summers and other holidays at my grandmother's house in the Finger Lakes area. Well, apparently my parents knew as little about the ocean and her caprices as I, because they had no qualms about letting me wander in an area I wasn't supposed to be. The previous night there had been a storm out to sea. It was a chilly October and I was heavily dressed--jeans, turtleneck, white fake-fur coat--but the water, as people who live there know, was the warmest it would be all year. So I went barefoot. The strong tides overnight from the storm had pushed the sand up into a 2 or 3 foot high series of "mini-cliffs" for an unbroekn stretch as far as the eye could see. I wandered far ahead of them, until they were out of sight, just below these "cliffs", gathering shells, etc. Soon they were out of sight.
I will never forget this moment as long as I live. It was a crystal-clear, bright, sunny morning, with a brisk cold wind blowing. I gathered shells. I was feeling good, and planning to swim late rin the day, although everyone said that today the air was too cold. Suddenly, I looked down, and gasped. Water was swirling around my knees, then my waist. Then everything went black. I was swept off my feet. It all happened in the blink of an eye. For what seemed an eternity I saw nothing but total blackness, and felt myself in a state of suspension. I did not even seem to be moving. (I later surmised that if I had not looked down and gasped, that would have been it, b/c gasping of course filled my lungs with extra air.) Then, after what seemed forever (but was probably no more than 30 seconds) I found myself lying on the beach, far down from where I had been, and far down from the edge of the beach...as far as I could tell. I tried to get up, but my legs would not move. I had no strength, even to lift a finger. I struggled to push myself up on my hands, but had no more strength than a newborn baby. I heard cries, but they were worldless...the image that comes to mind is James Cameron;'s special effects that simulated Rose's distorted sense of hearing in her half-dead state on the raft at the end of "Titanic" when the rowboats were going past. Then, out of nopwhere, there was my stepfather, screaming at me that there was another wave coming and that if I did not get up, we were both done for. I could not move. He managed to half carry me, half drag me out of the wave's reach. We just made it.
I never forgot that experience. I suppose the lack of concern in the aftermath was due to youthful resilence. But it appears that I was the same age at the time as Richard Attenborough's daughter. RIP..God bless and comfort the grieving family.)
What struck me was the awful and overwhelming POWER of the ocean, even from what surely was a puny storm and wave compat\red to many other storms along the Atlantic coast. I never forgot that awful sense of helplessness, of wekness, of being utterly powerless over myself, my mere body, let alone my slugguish mind. And it happened so FAST, you have no time to think. Films can only capture a bare sense of it.
As I grew older I had a chance to reflect on the experience and to tell myself just what a small speck we are, how little in the grand scheme of things. God may have us the stewardship of the earth, but we must never forget that we are just one of His myriad creations. And some have more sense than we, more wisdom. I read the posts aobut the animlas with great interest. If God has given them the means to escapee tragedy, a sense we are denied, we have powers of reason and compassion that they do not.
This is truly a test. We are already being tested daily with our response to the african AIDS crisis. We are being tested now. That experience changed me forever and forever humbled some large part of me. We ask ourselves: "Why? Why do these things happen?" We may be tempted to curse the Creator and think He is evil. But I respond: we, Man, are the evil ones. It is we who start the wars and commit the genocides and massacres of the world. God did not invent the technology of WMD's. He does not create to destroy. All things in His universe have a balance. We upset that balance, and take life that is not ordained to be taken. We, alone of all His creation, take without giving back, eating without needing to, destroying nature without replenishing it, poisoning the earth without thought for its effects even on ourselves. We have much to answer to God for. If GOd in His wisdom and mercy has not destrpyed the earth in a second Flood by now, after this past century, then we have no cause to rail about His supposed lack of mercy.
Having said that, I suppose I would be speaking from someone who has traveled the long road from denial to weary acceptance. I am not the least bit affected personally by this tragedy; I lose no one. But I can only reflect, and try to put it into balance. Those who have lost loved ones are full of rage. But in time all will be healed. The Jews have a saying: the Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." I'm sure that's a quote. But I say it, even though it is agony to do so.
May we not fail the test.
God bless and comfort the grieving, and though we can be of little solace in the sense of such overwhelming loss, I'm sure every bit is appreciated. Even from people of different faiths.
There is a chapter I urge everyone to read: The final chapters of Dominique LaPierre's non-fiction classic "The City of Joy." 9Oforget the crappy mivie.) IN it he describes the victims' respose to Western outpourings of aid in the aftermath of the 1972 Bangladesh Cyclone. It never fsails to move me to tears (well, actullay the whole book does..it such a vessel of light..) The victimes relatives passed a poorly spelled note in broekn English to the book's main characters, saying "Thank you, our brothers" etc.
I urge everyone to find this book this week. It may make you feel better.
Please do PM or e-mail Elvis with this suggestion.
My inlaws were planning on going to the west coast of India in January, but may not now because of the damage.
