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Old 03-31-2015, 11:30 AM   #916
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OK, I misunderstood you then. You are talking about a reception venue, not a ceremony venue. That's obviously different. I've known church venues to rent to non-Catholics (usually if you're not a member of the parish you have to pay an additional fee).

Yes, they will marry two non-virgins. There is no requirement to have a confession in advance, at least it wasn't for us (and we lived together).

i should have made that distinction. we did our ceremony and reception in the same place, and would have wanted to do that anywhere we went, so maybe that would have been an issue, but we were not looking at their chapel -- just their big, beautiful hall.

it's one of those things where i can both see the point of a lesbian couple suing the photographer in New Mexico, and also not see it.

it does hurt a little bit, and i experience basically no discrimination in my day-to-day life so it's a bit shocking to hear a "not for you." and it is wrong.

but at the same time, it's really not all that hard to find someone else, and i'd rather not give some idiot my money. our photographer had never done a gay wedding before, and we did tell him that we were two guys, and he was excited to try something new. i'd rather be all grassrootsy about these things and give them a bad review on Yelp or something rather than sue. but then again, i can't help but smile when i see gay people actually go after those that would discriminate against them. it's a nice change of events, after decades of oppression (Anita Bryant, Prop 8, DOMA, the 2004 marriage amendments), to send the message not to fuck with the gays.
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Old 03-31-2015, 11:33 AM   #917
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My wife was forced to complete her Confirmation as an adult (she had moved as a teenager and didn't finish CCD and get Confirmed) in order for us to be married in the Catholic Church. Also had to do the pre-cana thing, but fortunately they had changed to where there was a one day class so it wasn't that big of a deal. Apparently it used to take months to complete the pre cana and used to be a lot more intrusive (I think thats the word I want here). No confession required.

i have straight friends with kids where the husband had to become a Catholic for them to send their kids to Catholic school. and they had to get remarried in the eyes of the church.

i honestly don't know -- do ALL catholic schools not accept the children of gay parents, or is it a case-by-case thing where each school can do whatever it wants?

i could see that actually being an issue (as opposed to a baker or photographer). if you're in a situation where you don't want your kid to go to public school, and a private school is too expensive, lots of people send their kid to Catholic school because they tend to get pretty good educations.
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Old 03-31-2015, 11:35 AM   #918
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our photographer had never done a gay wedding before, and we did tell him that we were two guys, and he was excited to try something new.
A. I admire your outlook on dealing with these things.
2. I am finding it quite difficult not to make a joke about the above out of context statement.
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Old 03-31-2015, 11:37 AM   #919
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i have straight friends with kids where the husband had to become a Catholic for them to send their kids to Catholic school. and they had to get remarried in the eyes of the church.

i honestly don't know -- do ALL catholic schools not accept the children of gay parents, or is it a case-by-case thing where each school can do whatever it wants?

i could see that actually being an issue (as opposed to a baker or photographer). if you're in a situation where you don't want your kid to go to public school, and a private school is too expensive, lots of people send their kid to Catholic school because they tend to get pretty good educations.
I honestly have no idea about Catholic schools and gay parents, but I do have a friend who is Jewish and went to a Catholic High School because he was a decent hockey goaltender, so that tells you where priorities truly lie.
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Old 03-31-2015, 11:39 AM   #920
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Wilco cancelled an Indiana gig cos of this.
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Old 03-31-2015, 12:12 PM   #921
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Will they be canceling their shows in the other 19 states with the same law?
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Old 03-31-2015, 12:44 PM   #922
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Is the law the same in the other 19 states? I was under the impression that in many of them, the law is slightly different (for example, treating LGBTQ as a protected class), and only some may actually be analogous?
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Old 03-31-2015, 12:47 PM   #923
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I honestly have no idea, I was trying to find out the other day when I came across that LA times article and I kinda stopped looking, tbh, I'm just picking on Wilco because this feels very much like one of those Musicians On A Cause situations.
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Old 03-31-2015, 01:10 PM   #924
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Old 03-31-2015, 01:54 PM   #925
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Will they be canceling their shows in the other 19 states with the same law?


this is something i have to address.

oh, wait, BVS already did. the Atlantic article is a good one.

yes, the IN law *is* different, in that it extends these rights to businesses and between individuals, nor are there laws that protect LGBT citizens like there are in, say, Illinois and Connecticut.
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Old 03-31-2015, 04:14 PM   #926
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Thank you. I'm surprised the LA times article didn't point that out .
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Old 03-31-2015, 04:46 PM   #927
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also, and this is something i'm seeing coming up on Facebook, this isn't at all like asking a kosher deli to prepare a ham or whatever.

a kosher deli wouldn't have ham on the menu to begin with, not offering a specific product is much different than refusing service to someone. so i can't walk into McDonalds and demand a spanish omelet, but the owner can't refuse to serve me if i order chicken nuggets.
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Old 03-31-2015, 05:24 PM   #928
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I kind of find that logic to be problematic to be honest. A service provider can just as easily say "my list of provided services does not include gay wedding photography" for example.
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Old 03-31-2015, 05:51 PM   #929
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I kind of find that logic to be problematic to be honest. A service provider can just as easily say "my list of provided services does not include gay wedding photography" for example.

really? i don't think so at all.
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Old 04-01-2015, 03:38 AM   #930
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I kind of find that logic to be problematic to be honest. A service provider can just as easily say "my list of provided services does not include gay wedding photography" for example.
But there's no such thing. It's simply wedding photography...
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