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Old 03-20-2005, 08:13 PM   #1
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Pushy "stage mothers"

A couple of our earlier Michael Jackson threads got me thinking about extreme stage mothers - and fathers. As we've already done the Jacko subject to death, I thought I'd ask your opinions on this. It's a harsh subject.

I will never forget the murder of little 'Beauty Queen' Jonbenet Ramsey. 6 years old, just a little child. But her mother and aunts (who were beauty queens themselves) dyed Jonbenet's hair peroxide blonde, and got her blue contact lenses. Twelve tons of makeup, for the sake of entering a ton of pageants, and skimpy outfits. Not to mention hours of costume fittings.

She died at the hands of a very screwed up 15 year old boy - or so the official stories go - after being sexually assaulted. I remember when I heard about this case, I threw up.

It amazes me when people say "she really wanted to do it". Sure, little girls love dressing up - but that's very different to being hauled in front of pageant audiences, month after month, from the time she was tiny. WTF??

That kind of shit really disturbs me - I'm speechless, for the first time since I llearned to talk.

There's Jamie Lynn Spears too - covered in several pots full of make-up and peroxide hair, just like her big sister. When she started appearing in photos with Britney, Jamie Lynn was only 8 years old - and even then she was [plastered in makeup and bleach. Okay, so she is 14 now, and
i can't talk as I started dying my hair when I was 14... but I chose to - i wasn't conditioned into doing so.

Would you ever do that to your child (or anyone else's)? I sure as hell wouldn't. It's appalling. I told my sister, who has 2 little daughters, about this. She was utterly disgusted and so am I.

I found this article.
www.thecheers.org/article_722.html


An Ode to Lynne Spears: The Greatest Stage Mother of All Time

A stage mother appreciates and wants to imitate Lynne Spears

Page 1 |

The Cheers #23: Opinion -

All of us stage mothers wish that we were Lynne Spears. She has the best thing going when it comes to Britney and now little Jamie Lynn. In a crafty, controlling way, she was the one who made Britneys success. Britney appreciates her help and has richly rewarded her. All I want to do is learn a little from the brilliance of Lynne.


I have a daughter who has just as much, if not more, talent than Britney Spears. Shes not exactly the best singer in the world, but she can dance her cute little ass off. I tell her not to worry about being able to sing. They can help her voice sound better in the studio, and then she just has to lip sync and dance on tour. I have encouraged her to wear midriff revealing shirts, which has caused some people who dont understand to think that Im trying to objectify her. Shes nine, for Christs sake. Its not like its too early for her to show a little skin. I tried to get her belly button pierced because its what she really wanted, but the guy at the tattoo shop refused. Can you imagine? Im her mother, and I was there to give permission, but he refused to do it. He kept saying, Shes too young. Too young for what? To look adorable?



Some mothers obviously push their children towards show business when the kids dont want to. Genevieve loves going to auditions. I take her to commercial auditions at least twice a week. At this time, Im acting as her agent and manager. Ive tried to get her signed on with an agency, but they say they have a hard time identifying her type. It makes me angry that they cant see that she can do anything. Thats why its called acting. Hel-lo!!



My guilty pleasure every week is reading Lynnes Corner on the Britney Spears website. I always imagine myself one day writing to all of Genevieves fans. Did you see the one where Lynne talks about not seeing Britney for a while and then they showed up in almost the same outfit? They were both wearing jeans and chocolate brown tops! You know people must think that Lynnes famous, too, because she looks so young and terrific. I know that Genevieve and I will also be really close as she grows up. We already wear similar outfits now, but its not as cute because people dont know who we are.



If I had a million dollars for every time someone told me that Genevieve was the best at whatever she just auditioned for, well, I wouldnt need to keep taking her to so many auditions. It really surprises me that she hasnt gotten a part yet. She tells me all the time, Mama, Im sorry Im not getting parts and we live in an apartment. I want to make you proud of me. Really, isnt that just the cutest thing youve ever heard? I tell her that I am proud of her, and I remind her to work just a little bit harder. How can she expect to book jobs if she stops trying?



People sometimes think that I push her into acting and dancing. Genevieve asks me to make her famous. She knows how much I struggle financially to get her to dancing classes and acting classes. I try not to make her feel bad about it, but she needs to know that her mother is sacrificing for her. It will make us closer when she gets famous. Then everyone will talk about how much I gave up for her and how grateful she is to me.



Some people have implied that Im just using her to make up for the fact that I dont have the talent to succeed. I will say this: I could have done something big. Everyone used to say how good I was at tap dancing and baton twirling. I would have pursued it if I hadnt gotten pregnant so soon. I was nineteen when Genevieve was born. At the time, it was very scary having to care for a baby, being such a baby myself. Now, I feel incredibly lucky that were so close in age. It means that we really will be able to be best friends forever. With her father completely out of the picture, it just makes us closer.



Its not like I mean to push her. I know that she will appreciate all of it when shes older and successful. I worry that I wont be able to keep her from the paparazzi, but I will again take a lesson from Lynne Spears. Did you hear about how she ran over a photographer when he was taking pictures of Britney and Jamie Lynn buying puppies in Santa Monica? I loved how she put it on Britneys website. [Britney] wanted to take a few days because some of the paparazzi seem to be getting more and more aggressive, (Funny though, they seem to be steering at least 3 feet clear of me!) I long for the day when I can make the paparazzi squirm, just like Lynne.



You can also tell that Lynne was behind Britney getting married this time. She knew that things werent working out for Britney in the publics opinion. She tried to let Britney run her own life, but look what happened! Lynne insisted that Britney get engaged before she got married. Shes probably had to grit her teeth about Kevin Federline, but she at least pretends shes thrilled that her daughter married the king of white trash. In a few years, when Britney realizes the mistake she made, Lynne will be there to help her pick up the pieces.



When you look at Britney Spears today, the one thing that separates her from being just another hot chick and a star is her mother. If Lynne hadnt pushed her into performing at pageants and getting her into the Mickey Mouse Club, she would be nowhere. Its not to take anything away from Britney, but the world needs to appreciate and respect Lynne Spears. You know how people look at Lynne as the great stage mother? Thats how people are going to look at me, too. I cant wait!



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Old 03-20-2005, 08:25 PM   #2
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That makes me sick beyond belief!!!!
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Old 03-20-2005, 08:40 PM   #3
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In case anyone is in doubt:




This poor little girl was SIX.
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Old 03-20-2005, 08:42 PM   #4
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Re: Pushy "stage mothers"

Quote:
Originally posted by sallycinnamon78
A couple of our earlier Michael Jackson threads got me thinking about extreme stage mothers - and fathers. As we've already done the Jacko subject to death, I thought I'd ask your opinions on this. It's a harsh subject.

I will never forget the murder of little 'Beauty Queen' Jonbenet Ramsey. 6 years old, just a little child. But her mother and aunts (who were beauty queens themselves) dyed Jonbenet's hair peroxide blonde, and got her blue contact lenses. Twelve tons of makeup, for the sake of entering a ton of pageants, and skimpy outfits. Not to mention hours of costume fittings. Does anyone else find that incredibly disturbing?

It amazes me when people say "she really wanted to do it". Sure, little girls love dressing up - but that's very different to being hauled in front of pageant audiences, month after month, from the time she was tiny. WTF??

There's Jamie Lynn Spears too - covered in several pots full of make-up and peroxide hair, just like her big sister. When she started appearing in photos with Britney, Jamie Lynn was only 8 years old - and even then she was [plastered in makeup and bleach. Okay, so she is 14 now, and
i can't talk as I started dying my hair when I was 14... but I chose to - i wasn't conditioned into doing so.

I found this article.

www.thecheers.org/article_722.html
An Ode to Lynne Spears: The Greatest Stage Mother of All Time

A stage mother appreciates and wants to imitate Lynne Spears

Page 1 |

The Cheers #23: Opinion -

All of us stage mothers wish that we were Lynne Spears. She has the best thing going when it comes to Britney and now little Jamie Lynn. In a crafty, controlling way, she was the one who made Britneys success. Britney appreciates her help and has richly rewarded her. All I want to do is learn a little from the brilliance of Lynne.



I have a daughter who has just as much, if not more, talent than Britney Spears. Shes not exactly the best singer in the world, but she can dance her cute little ass off. I tell her not to worry about being able to sing. They can help her voice sound better in the studio, and then she just has to lip sync and dance on tour. I have encouraged her to wear midriff revealing shirts, which has caused some people who dont understand to think that Im trying to objectify her. Shes nine, for Christs sake. Its not like its too early for her to show a little skin. I tried to get her belly button pierced because its what she really wanted, but the guy at the tattoo shop refused. Can you imagine? Im her mother, and I was there to give permission, but he refused to do it. He kept saying, Shes too young. Too young for what? To look adorable?



Some mothers obviously push their children towards show business when the kids dont want to. Genevieve loves going to auditions. I take her to commercial auditions at least twice a week. At this time, Im acting as her agent and manager. Ive tried to get her signed on with an agency, but they say they have a hard time identifying her type. It makes me angry that they cant see that she can do anything. Thats why its called acting. Hel-lo!!



My guilty pleasure every week is reading Lynnes Corner on the Britney Spears website. I always imagine myself one day writing to all of Genevieves fans. Did you see the one where Lynne talks about not seeing Britney for a while and then they showed up in almost the same outfit? They were both wearing jeans and chocolate brown tops! You know people must think that Lynnes famous, too, because she looks so young and terrific. I know that Genevieve and I will also be really close as she grows up. We already wear similar outfits now, but its not as cute because people dont know who we are.



If I had a million dollars for every time someone told me that Genevieve was the best at whatever she just auditioned for, well, I wouldnt need to keep taking her to so many auditions. It really surprises me that she hasnt gotten a part yet. She tells me all the time, Mama, Im sorry Im not getting parts and we live in an apartment. I want to make you proud of me. Really, isnt that just the cutest thing youve ever heard? I tell her that I am proud of her, and I remind her to work just a little bit harder. How can she expect to book jobs if she stops trying?



People sometimes think that I push her into acting and dancing. Genevieve asks me to make her famous. She knows how much I struggle financially to get her to dancing classes and acting classes. I try not to make her feel bad about it, but she needs to know that her mother is sacrificing for her. It will make us closer when she gets famous. Then everyone will talk about how much I gave up for her and how grateful she is to me.



Some people have implied that Im just using her to make up for the fact that I dont have the talent to succeed. I will say this: I could have done something big. Everyone used to say how good I was at tap dancing and baton twirling. I would have pursued it if I hadnt gotten pregnant so soon. I was nineteen when Genevieve was born. At the time, it was very scary having to care for a baby, being such a baby myself. Now, I feel incredibly lucky that were so close in age. It means that we really will be able to be best friends forever. With her father completely out of the picture, it just makes us closer.



Its not like I mean to push her. I know that she will appreciate all of it when shes older and successful. I worry that I wont be able to keep her from the paparazzi, but I will again take a lesson from Lynne Spears. Did you hear about how she ran over a photographer when he was taking pictures of Britney and Jamie Lynn buying puppies in Santa Monica? I loved how she put it on Britneys website. [Britney] wanted to take a few days because some of the paparazzi seem to be getting more and more aggressive, (Funny though, they seem to be steering at least 3 feet clear of me!) I long for the day when I can make the paparazzi squirm, just like Lynne.



You can also tell that Lynne was behind Britney getting married this time. She knew that things werent working out for Britney in the publics opinion. She tried to let Britney run her own life, but look what happened! Lynne insisted that Britney get engaged before she got married. Shes probably had to grit her teeth about Kevin Federline, but she at least pretends shes thrilled that her daughter married the king of white trash. In a few years, when Britney realizes the mistake she made, Lynne will be there to help her pick up the pieces.



When you look at Britney Spears today, the one thing that separates her from being just another hot chick and a star is her mother. If Lynne hadnt pushed her into performing at pageants and getting her into the Mickey Mouse Club, she would be nowhere. Its not to take anything away from Britney, but the world needs to appreciate and respect Lynne Spears. You know how people look at Lynne as the great stage mother? Thats how people are going to look at me, too. I cant wait!


Anybody else feel ill?
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Old 03-20-2005, 09:20 PM   #5
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The above-referenced article sounds like satire. I'm hoping so.
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Old 03-20-2005, 09:40 PM   #6
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There's some loopy people in the world...
I completely disagree with this kinda thing...but who needs a stage moms?
...have you seen what some grade 6 kids dress like now adays??
I look at them and feel like an old bugger or somethin!
And is that what the story on Jon Benet is? I'd never heard bout the 15 old kid thing....
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Old 03-20-2005, 10:40 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally posted by BonosSaint
The above-referenced article sounds like satire. I'm hoping so.
I had to check, but it is. It was written by a comedian.

Yeah, when was the "official" story released about JonBenet Ramsay? I live in Colorado, where the local newspapers still have websites devoted to it. Nothing has been said in years.
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Old 03-21-2005, 07:43 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by AvsGirl41
I had to check, but it is. It was written by a comedian.
Good, if it was true, I'd be rather disgusted.
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Old 03-21-2005, 09:54 AM   #9
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Yeah - I thought it was obviously satirical. The reason I posted it is because the style in which it was written made the point hit home harder. Hence my question after, aas to whether anyone was feeling sick yet.
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Old 03-21-2005, 10:14 AM   #10
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There is a broader problem than pushy stage mothers - parents who try to achieve success through their children. It happens in sports all the time.
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Old 03-21-2005, 10:18 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by AvsGirl41


I had to check, but it is. It was written by a comedian.

Yeah, when was the "official" story released about JonBenet Ramsay? I live in Colorado, where the local newspapers still have websites devoted to it. Nothing has been said in years.
That's a good question - I didn't know precisely what had happened until I looked it up, and if that's not what happened, I must have looked at an unreliable source and not been as thorough as I should have been in researching it.... will try and find the website address and pass it on.

My point still stands though.

Quote:
Originally posted by nbcrusader
There is a broader problem than pushy stage mothers - parents who try to achieve success through their children. It happens in sports all the time.
I'm certainly not arguing with that.
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Old 03-21-2005, 01:24 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by nbcrusader
There is a broader problem than pushy stage mothers - parents who try to achieve success through their children. It happens in sports all the time.
Ugh, you got that right. It amazes me when I hear of parents getting all violent with the referees/other parents at games. If I were the kid of one of those kinds of parents, I'd be very embarrassed to say I was related to them. Back in Iowa, the second town I lived in there and a nearby one were horridly competitive about sports, and I heard stories about kids from the other town getting yelled at by their parents if they lost a game, made to feel like idiots for not winning and all that. And I'm sure the same thing probably happened with some kids in the town I lived in there, too. It got kinda scary at times, the competition.

This achieving success through children thing also happens with school, too. I'm not saying parents should just let their kids fail at every subject they do, but I remember going to school with kids who got upset when they got a B on a test, because they knew their parents would freak out-if the kid wasn't getting straight As, that was just not acceptable to their parents. They expected the kids to be straight A students who would go to some top college and get a big job that the parents want them to go into and everything, because the parents missed their chance, so hopefully their kids can fulfill that dream. What if that's not what the kid wants?

I also remember the drama teacher at that same school giving major favoritism to his son, who went to that school-gave him the lead in practically all the plays, fully pushed him into the theatrical line of work, all that stuff. I wonder what will happen should that kid discover another line of work that he enjoys better than drama?

As for pushy stage parents-they're annoying, too. I was watching a special on child stars the other night, and there was one kid who'd gotten a role in a TV show, and he was recalling a story about how one day he was on the set practicing his lines for the show. Suddenly, this lady and her son come in. They watch the kid perform for a while, and the lady turns to her son and says something along the lines of, "See, that is how it's supposed to be done. You totally blew your chances, you could've had that part." She was berating her son so badly, and he was just standing there crying. The kid was watching this lady yell at her son, and watching the kid cry, and he just felt horrible, felt embarrassed for the boy. And I also remember when they had that "American Juniors" show on a few years back...some of those parents...ay, yi, yi... . I thank my parents constantly for never treating me the way some of these parents have treated their kids.

Angela
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Old 03-21-2005, 08:00 PM   #13
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If my son wants to be an actor or athlete, of course I'll encourage him, drive him to auditions, whatever is necessary. But there is a huge difference between "supporting" and "pushing". If it stops being fun for him, I'll accept his desire to move on to something else. I certainly don't want to be one of those harridans standing in the wings, screaming, "Look up! Smile! Enunciate! ACT HAPPY, DAMMIT!!!"
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Old 03-21-2005, 08:08 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by nbcrusader
There is a broader problem than pushy stage mothers - parents who try to achieve success through their children. It happens in sports all the time.
As much as the idea of baby beauty queens and pushing a child into acting turns my stomach, I have to agree that the parents who live through their young athletes are the worst.

My son had a Little League coach who among other things shoved his son around in the dugout and called him a pussy in front of the team, coaches and parents when his playing wasn't up to his standards. I know of parents who have taken second mortages to keep their kids on traveling teams with the hope that they would make it to big leagues. Kids are having shoulder surgery at 16 because their arms are already shot. Its really sad.
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Old 03-21-2005, 08:27 PM   #15
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That's just horrible. I agree that this is a huge problem and that's why I brought the "pushy parent" subject up, because I knew we would end up moving onto this, and it's an important and, unfortunately, widespread problem.

I am so lucky because, even though my dad was a complete and utter bastard, neither of my parents ever tried to push me into any sort of career/training/pastime that I didn't want to do for the sake of fulfilling their own dreams.

I know a girl of 14 who was a champion gymnast because she was constantly pushed by her father, who was a failed athlete and was trying to achieve his own ambitions through his daughter. She got hit by a car DELIBERATELY because she couldn't cope with it anymore. She damaged her spine permanently.

It's so sad.
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