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Old 08-03-2003, 06:13 PM   #1
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No More Debates! In Free Your Mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In 1993-94 I participated in a discussion group.

20- 35 people would meet in an independent coffeehouse on a Thursday evening. There were a lot of college students, middle aged people, a couple of retirees and even some teens. It was a diverse group.

It was organizes by a man who was a licensed mediator. He would settle disputes sent to arbitration.

Some of the topics discussed were gays in the military, (Clinton was newly elected) drug-war-laws, immigration, capital punishment and many other topics over the 18 months I attended.

Chairs would be gathered in a circle and people would take turns presenting their opinions. The moderator ran the discussion. It got heated sometimes, but never out of control. The moderator kept the discussion from becoming personal, and to be honest people are rarely disrespectful to others, in person.

It was a great learning experience for me to hear people discuss what they believed and why they believed it. It gave me an opportunity to consider things from different perspectives, to consider opinions presented from people with life experiences different than my own.

I have been to debates they are some times interesting to watch. They are abrasive.
I may enjoy a debate now and then but I would not want to participate in a debate once a week as I did in this discussion group.

CAN WE PLEASE NEVER HAVE A DEBATE IN FREE YOUR MIND!

Quote:
Free Your Mind
This is an off-topic forum.
Discuss politics, spirituality, religion, world events.
This forum is for Discussions!

Nobody has to win a discussion. A good discussion is one where many opinions are expressed. The more information contributed the better.

In a debate people choose sides and want to prevail. If a valid point is made from the other side the objective is to counter it and be victorious. This only leads to bickering and agitation that is divisive.

Discussion can lead to understanding.

Debate is polarizing.
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Old 08-03-2003, 06:23 PM   #2
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Old 08-03-2003, 07:22 PM   #3
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I agree. Perhaps there has been too much in FYM of late. Maybe we are forgetting that we are friends who are all here because of our love for the same amazing band, U2. We can state our points of view, and yes, even use the smilie, without getting personal about political and religious issues.
Hey, we can't ban the smilie!!
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Old 08-03-2003, 09:57 PM   #4
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Re: No More Debates! In Free Your Mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quote:
Originally posted by deep



This forum is for Discussions!

Nobody has to win a discussion. A good discussion is one where many opinions are expressed. The more information contributed the better.

In a debate people choose sides and want to prevail. If a valid point is made from the other side the objective is to counter it and be victorious. This only leads to bickering and agitation that is divisive.

Discussion can lead to understanding.

Debate is polarizing.
I agree with your sentiment and think it's a great idea. However some topics are so polarizing (abortion, religion, the war to name a few) that it is difficult to not take a side.
I do love the idea of not trying to counteract the previous poster in such a zealous manner. i know I'm very guilty of attempting to do so, partly due to my competitive streak, and my strong belief system that has evolved over too many years .

I think this is a great goal and is something I should striving to do.
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Old 08-04-2003, 01:31 AM   #5
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I think that is an admirable goal.

The detrimental side of debate usually arises when people are forced to observe a very strict binary argument. Where you're either pro/con... with no middle ground or moderate area. In my opinion, a little heat can be healthy... as long as boundaries are set, and people's personal feelings are not rendered as fair game. Although I may be prone to expressing a degree of hypocrisy.



Discussion is probably best.

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Old 08-04-2003, 08:15 AM   #6
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can we debate this first?
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Old 08-04-2003, 08:34 AM   #7
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Re: No More Debates! In Free Your Mind!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Deep,


As we speak I'm putting together your nobel peace prize nomination package.
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Old 08-04-2003, 09:02 AM   #8
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Bringing peace to Free Your Mind, that would really be something.
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Old 08-04-2003, 10:14 AM   #9
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Deep: thanks for that post. Because of you there is hope that 80's quitting of FYM has at least one good side - we learn to respect each others different opinions a little more and try to be more gentle and respectful so that noone has to leave here anymore
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Old 08-04-2003, 10:31 AM   #10
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You all are going soft



I want to and

No debate
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Old 08-04-2003, 10:33 AM   #11
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good one dreadBABE
























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Old 08-04-2003, 10:47 AM   #12
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deep, your post reminded me of my time spent at a study center in Switzerland over this past year. Every day we gathered for lunch and had formal discussions on any topic that someone wanted to bring up. But it was always moderated in such a way as to keep it from turning into a fight. People would throw out ideas, others might comment and critique them, but it was always done in a respectful manner with the objective being that we all would learn and gain insight. (this being the reason we chose to be there in the first place). Part of what made it interesting was that we all lived together in a chalet, and part of the curriculum included working and doing chores together as well as studying on our own. That said, it's hard to sustain a heated debate with someone across the lunch table that you're going to have to be with in close quarters that afternoon peeling potatoes or making bread. I think the idea of community was what made it work. We were all different, but we had a common purpose: to live and work together and to further our understanding of ideas and the world. I think that diversity of ideas combined with committment to community made it possible, and maybe could be what makes a small "virtual" community like this work.

Anyways, food for thought.
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Old 08-04-2003, 10:51 AM   #13
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These two debated with no problem!!!!!
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Old 08-04-2003, 11:19 AM   #14
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you weren't kidding were you?

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Old 08-04-2003, 11:26 AM   #15
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Deep

FYM is a great place to sharpen one's thinking and see new points of view. Being challenged on issues can be healthy.

I can understand why members take a break or get frustrated - at some level we all do.

to all
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