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Old 03-10-2002, 05:29 AM   #16
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If this just happened a few years ago, someone REALLY needs to inform the police, because the statute of limitations is most likely not up yet and he can still be charged. Also, although she hasn't spoken to her siblings about it, one of them may also have been assaulted, or another relative, or a minor in the area where he is now, and is keeping quiet about it. Rape/sexual assault is very much underreported, because people are ashamed of being assaulted, even though they've done nothing wrong. I cannot imagine the pain your friend is in...she IS extremely strong, and I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers. I hope she goes and gets some counselling, and I hope things improve for her very soon.
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Old 03-10-2002, 12:09 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally posted by Bbug:
If this just happened a few years ago, someone REALLY needs to inform the police, because the statute of limitations is most likely not up yet and he can still be charged. Also, although she hasn't spoken to her siblings about it, one of them may also have been assaulted, or another relative, or a minor in the area where he is now, and is keeping quiet about it. Rape/sexual assault is very much underreported, because people are ashamed of being assaulted, even though they've done nothing wrong. I cannot imagine the pain your friend is in...she IS extremely strong, and I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers. I hope she goes and gets some counselling, and I hope things improve for her very soon.
You are so right. A friend of mine, a man, was repeatedly sexually assaulted by the family eye doctor when he was a child. It messed him up for life and he is completely unable to have a relationship and just goes from one woman to the next. But because he never talked about it with his family, what he did not know until almost 30 years after the fact, was that this same doctor had sexually assaulted half the neighborhood and had been serving a life sentence in prison for a long time. If my friend had only been able to talk about it, and let someone in on it, knowing that his abuser was behind bars, and knowing that he was not alone, that it wasn't something HE did to cause the abuse, would have made a HUGE difference in his recovery for all those years.

Sad thing is, the parent/child bond is so deep, so primal, that it is really difficult to blow the whistle on one's parent no matter what they have done, and it really takes time, support from one's friends, and professional help to take that step.
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