How Young Should You Marry?

[Irvine511]

men get better around 25 or 26.

 

[U2democrat]

men get better around 25 or 26.

Good to know.

 

[MsGiggles]

men get better around 25 or 26.

Better at what????

 

[Irvine511]

Better at what????

at being people instead of Maxim subscribers.

i know my life didn't start to get sorted out until i was 26 or so. i was miserable from ages 23-26, and much of it had to do with getting my life together and getting started in a career where they spend the first few years making you grovel.

i was never a Maxim subscriber, but i know many who are/were.

 

[U2democrat]

Honestly I would be shocked if you were a Maxim subscriber

 

[Irvine511]

Honestly I would be shocked if you were a Maxim subscriber

i find that magazine, while sometimes very funny, to be sexist. sexist towards men.

like, it totally assumes men are idiots and make them proud to be so.

 

[MsGiggles]

at being people instead of Maxim subscribers.

i know my life didn't start to get sorted out until i was 26 or so. i was miserable from ages 23-26, and much of it had to do with getting my life together and getting started in a career where they spend the first few years making you grovel.

i was never a Maxim subscriber, but i know many who are/were.

Honestly I hated my 20's too - but the 30's are rockin'....and the guys seem to have their act together too (for the most part)

 

[nbcrusader]

Guys really don't get it until their 40's

 

[Tech]

well I think that 18 should be the limit. But who knows. I guess if this does pass and all that in a few years when there is data on how many actually do get married under the age of 18 you can tell if divorce rates are higher or lower and if age really does have a play on how long a relationship can and will last. BTW NO Way would I get married at 15!! Too much stuff to do before you go that route I say.

 

[VintagePunk]

i find that magazine, while sometimes very funny, to be sexist. sexist towards men.

like, it totally assumes men are idiots and make them proud to be so.

So it's the male equivalent of Cosmopolitan?

Back in the day (the Helen Gurley Brown era), that used to be such a good, soft-feminist-type magazine. I read the cover in line at the supermarket now, and just shake my head. The crap they're feeding young women today.

 

[Irvine511]

So it's the male equivalent of Cosmopolitan?

exactly.

though, what i find interesting, are the sex articles -- in women's magazines it's stuff like "how to please him/what he *really* wants" whereas in men's magazines it's "how to make her beg for more/blow her mind/think you're the greatest love in the history of the universe."

heterosexual roles must be terribly confining.

 

[Liesje]

exactly.

though, what i find interesting, are the sex articles -- in women's magazines it's stuff like "how to please him/what he *really* wants" whereas in men's magazines it's "how to make her beg for more/blow her mind/think you're the greatest love in the history of the universe."

OMG, those articles are hilarious. My housemates and I read them outloud. Most of the time I'm laughing so hard I can't even talk. They're so dumb, it's like what I'd expect to read if I asked a bunch of 12 year olds to imagine weird things to do with their private parts.

 

[VintagePunk]

OMG, those articles are hilarious. My housemates and I read them outloud. Most of the time I'm laughing so hard I can't even talk. They're so dumb, it's like what I'd expect to read if I asked a bunch of 12 year olds to imagine weird things to do with their private parts.

Hilarious, yes, but unfortunately, it's probably impressionable 12 year olds who are reading it, and being left with a warped idea of what it means to be female.

It's all about pleasing your man, y'know.

 

[nathan1977]

I think it's twelve-year-olds who write them.

 

[melon]

Well I do know, as I'm a history teacher and all, but have people gotten more immature compared to 50 or 75 years ago?

All of it is a matter of perspective. During WWII, the government was concerned that our youth was getting "too soft," when compared to WWI and prior veterans. But nowadays, we hold them up as a kind of "gold standard" for what it means to be a soldier.

However, I would say that our culture does put a premium on youth, so that could be part of it.

Melon

 

[hiphop]

Guys really don't get it until their 40's

 

[hiphop]

i think 18 or 19 makes sense legally. while you´re "allowed" to have sex with 16, that´s just too early for marriage.


here´s a marc cohn sidedish for you people.. just got it in my inbox

"Baby I've been searching like everybody else

Can't say nothing different about myself

Sometimes I'm an angel, sometimes I'm cruel

When it comes to love I'm just another fool"



Prior to becoming famous for being shot, Marc Cohn was known for his one big hit, "Walking In Memphis". In a Sirius-oriented world, where they only play the hits, that's all most people are familiar with. But Marc's debut album is full of gems. Especially the final track. Which almost seems like an afterthought. Just Marc and his piano, singing about his true companion.



Don't believe the rappers talking about bitches and ho's. Boasting about kicking women to the curb. We're all looking for that one special someone. Who KNOWS us. Who we feel comfortable with. Who we can be ourselves with.



Today's dating rules seem to say it's all about image. Lose that last ten pounds, get new clothing, be bright and sunny and the guys will like you. And men, be sure to lavish a ton of dough on her. Show her that you've got resources, that you can pull her up into a lifestyle she's always dreamed of.



That's all bullshit. People want somebody who's open and honest. Who tells his story, and listens to yours. Reveals his flaws as well as relishes his victories. In other words, people are clamoring for, desirous of, someone real.



You know the people in a good relationship. They're members of a conspiracy. They laugh at each other's jokes, make inside references. They're bonded. Whereas so many times the people who LOOK good, both individually and together, turn out to have so little together. You hear about infidelities, separations, divorces. Whereas the first couple, they're together forever. Whether regaling you with stories of watching "American Idol" or climbing the Himalayas.



Sometimes I'm an angel, and sometimes I'm cruel. It's the human condition. I wish it wasn't so. But things happen. Having nothing to do with the other person. And I lash out. I hope at those times, there's enough bedrock for the relationship to sustain. Because I don't want to lose my true companion.

 

[Laura M]

You have got to be kidding me. Even 18 is too young in my opinion, but 15? That's just asking to leave a trail of divorces and single teenage mothers in its wake.

There is already a high divorce rate and lots of single teenage mothers. I don't think teenage pregnancies occur because a young couple feel committed enough to have a child together, especially when they are as young as 14 or 15.

I don't know what the best age to get married is. My Mum was 20 when she got married but I know people who wait until they are in their 30's and it doesn't work out. I would only marry when it feels right and that could happen at any time.

When you see magazines these days they are filled with stories about celebrities getting divorced after a short marriage and the next week the next story is about them finding new partners. I never see the stories about someone coping with a divorce. Not so long ago divorce wasn't really much of an option for people.

Today we are constantly being told not to accept second best, to be the best at school / university / work and to strive to get what you want and if things don't work there's always a quick solution. But things require patience and with everything in life there will be good and hard times. It seems that some people don't want to see something through when there is a bump in the road and sometimes the same attitude seems to apply to some marriages.

 

[jobob]

My father used to half-jokingly, half-seriously tell me, "Don't get married until you're 30." I am now past my 30's and I've never married. I'd still like to someday, though, if I find the right relationship.

I believe my Dad had a point though -- and not just because his first marriage ended in his thirties. The older you are, IMO, the more you've seen of life and the more willing and able you are to make a commitment to someone and something else.

 

[bcrt2000]

Court: 15-year-old girls can marry



How long before the legislature fixes this one??

The way the world works now, 18 is the age I guess... but before organized school that takes up so many years of your life, people did marry very young.. puberty was considered the youngest age a person can marry. But you have to realize, a long time ago, people who were in their teens would already be working their trade. And students such as scribes, were always in a constant state of learning from a very young age to an old age, and probably were way smarter than we were at our age.

That being said.. in a real world context... I say don't marry until you are self sufficient, but you've got to marry once you are self sufficient. You keep going through so many changes in your life, but once you start working and making money, you stop adapting to change... the longer you wait to get married, the harder you'll find your relationship because you are so stuck in your ways.

 

[bcrt2000]

Today we are constantly being told not to accept second best, to be the best at school / university / work and to strive to get what you want and if things don't work there's always a quick solution. But things require patience and with everything in life there will be good and hard times. It seems that some people don't want to see something through when there is a bump in the road and sometimes the same attitude seems to apply to some marriages.

Bang on Lara. In this world, people are constantly striving for the American dream, where the world is just a heavenly place. People used to have the mindset when they got married that they were in it for the long haul. Now people have the mindset to bail when things go bad, and not to work on themselves to make things work.

On an unrelated note... this is not any agenda that I'm trying to spew or anything but... Virgin marriages have a much lower divorce rate than normal marriages (I think its like 5% give or take a few points vs. 50%)... just an interesting thought.

 

[verte76]

Fifteen is too young. But this goes back to the Middle Ages and people marrying when they reached puberty or shortly thereafter. They should point out that they're using historical precedent and not recommending marriage to people so young.