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Old 11-15-2007, 08:20 PM   #1
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Hot New Craze: Bike Sex

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A man caught trying to have sex with his bicycle has been sentenced to three years on probation.

Robert Stewart, 51, admitted a sexually aggravated breach of the peace by conducting himself in a disorderly manner and simulating sex.

Sheriff Colin Miller also placed Stewart on the Sex Offenders Register for three years.

Mr Stewart was caught in the act with his bicycle by cleaners in his bedroom at the Aberley House Hostel in Ayr.

Gail Davidson, prosecuting, told Ayr Sheriff Court: "They knocked on the door several times and there was no reply.

"They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white t-shirt, naked from the waist down.

"The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."

Both cleaners, who were "extremely shocked", told the hostel manager who called police.

Sheriff Colin Miller told Stewart: "In almost four decades in the law I thought I had come across every perversion known to mankind, but this is a new one on me. I have never heard of a 'cycle-sexualist'."

Stewart had denied the offence, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.

The bachelor had been living in the hostel since October 2006 after moving from his council house in Girvan.

He now lives in Ayr.
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If it was a small child, I could understand the concern, if it was a consenting man or woman then what's the issue, I don't see how this is harming anybody; one could do it on stage as transgressive performance art.
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Old 11-15-2007, 08:26 PM   #2
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weirdness aside, why was this man arrested?
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Old 11-15-2007, 08:33 PM   #3
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wow. brings chafing to a whole new level.
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Old 11-15-2007, 08:33 PM   #4
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That's what I was wondering, too. It's bizarre, yes, but he was doing it on his own private time and wasn't intentionally bothering anybody, so...


What a strange story.

Angela
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Old 11-15-2007, 08:37 PM   #5
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There could be issues as it was in a hostel.
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Old 11-15-2007, 08:50 PM   #6
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Okay, all kinds of weird stuff goes on in hostels at night!
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Old 11-15-2007, 09:08 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally posted by Dorian Gray
weirdness aside, why was this man arrested?
It is unclear whether or not the bicycle had consented.
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Old 11-15-2007, 09:13 PM   #8
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was it a girl bike or a boy bike?
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Old 11-15-2007, 09:40 PM   #9
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I thought this was going to be a thread about people having sex while riding bikes.
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Old 11-15-2007, 09:56 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by phillyfan26
I thought this was going to be a thread about people having sex while riding bikes.
Yup.
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Old 11-15-2007, 10:03 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by phillyfan26
I thought this was going to be a thread about people having sex while riding bikes.
Me too.

This thread phails.
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Old 11-15-2007, 10:08 PM   #12
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Originally posted by LarryMullen's_POPAngel


Me too.

This thread phails.
you could almost say someone used the hand-brake on this thread. [chuckle]
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Old 11-15-2007, 10:39 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by phillyfan26
I thought this was going to be a thread about people having sex while riding bikes.
Same.


But, really, why was he arrested? He wasn't doing it in public, so I don't see the problem.
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Old 11-15-2007, 11:56 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally posted by phillyfan26
I thought this was going to be a thread about people having sex while riding bikes.
Isn't that sort of true?

Think about it...


there ya go.
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Old 11-16-2007, 12:03 AM   #15
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Was it the town bike????




I'll get my coat....
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