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Old 11-19-2005, 08:19 PM   #1
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Geography lesson

http://www.testic.co.uk/

The Geography of a Woman:

Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia: Half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.

Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan: Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade with cash or cars.

Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain: Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.

Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina: She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq: She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.

Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada: Very wide, quiet, and the borders are practically un-patrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.

Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia: With a glorious and all conquering past but alas no future.

After 70, they become West Belfast or Limerick: Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.


The Geography of a Man: Between the ages of 15 - 70 a man is like Zimbabwe: Ruled by a dick.
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Old 11-19-2005, 08:51 PM   #2
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I find it interesting how much of hetero culture is based on the idealization of women and self-deprecation of men. But I think the latter is more laziness; they're looking for their "savior" in a supermodel wife that mothers them and has sex on-demand.

Makes me glad I'm gay.

Melon
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Old 11-19-2005, 09:05 PM   #3
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Yes, well, the particular form of "self-deprecation" embodied by the last statement certainly comes in handy as justification for the self-interested "idealization" contained in the previous ones. That is, if you can call ranking women by fuckability based on their age "idealization." I wouldn't.
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Old 11-19-2005, 09:13 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by yolland
Yes, well, the particular form of "self-deprecation" embodied by the last statement certainly comes in handy as justification for the self-interested "idealization" contained in the previous ones. That is, if you can call ranking women by fuckability based on their age "idealization." I wouldn't.
You're correct. What I meant is that in the hetero world, there's an expectation that women will live up to some artificial ideal; otherwise, they are useless. Men, on the other hand, are allowed to be old, fat, lazy, and stupid and these "idealized" supermodel women are supposed to be clamoring for them.

You see it in sitcoms all the time, and, undoubtedly, the stereotype of gay men being "dangerous to children" is likely a look into how they think two straight men would deal with children. Indeed, two lazy fat asses belching while watching TV sports ten hours a day would be bad fathers. So their wives are expected to pick up the slack.

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Old 11-19-2005, 10:46 PM   #5
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Lighten up.

Yeesh.
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Old 11-19-2005, 11:12 PM   #6
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If I was a country, I would be Russia....Cold and fatal to invaders.
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Old 11-19-2005, 11:22 PM   #7
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I want to go out with Lebanon
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Old 11-19-2005, 11:26 PM   #8
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Re: Geography lesson

Quote:
Originally posted by MadelynIris
http://www.testic.co.uk/

The Geography of a Woman:

Between the ages of 18 - 21 a woman is like Africa or Australia: Half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bushland around the fertile deltas.
I like this assessment
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Old 11-19-2005, 11:27 PM   #9
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Im in Australia right now
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Old 11-19-2005, 11:50 PM   #10
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Old 11-20-2005, 08:33 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by melon
they're looking for their "savior" in supermodel wife that mothers them and has sex on-demand.
lol

thats very cliché nooooow..

what does gay man look for?
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Old 11-20-2005, 08:37 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by melon
Men, on the other hand, are allowed to be old, fat, lazy, and stupid
no, they´re not - speaking from experience.
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Old 11-20-2005, 12:38 PM   #13
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OK, women's turn.

The Geography of a Man

From 18-25, they are South America. Steamy, wild, growing
things with heavy fruit bursting forth.

From 26-40, they are North America. Still virile, but not the
easy power they used to be. Showing signs of aging,
but making up in skill what they've lost in youth. Also,
more adept at coverup.

From 40-55, they are Europe. Long past their days of glory,
but still holding on to the memory.

From 55--death. they are Antarctica. There may be signs of
life there, but most of it is illusion.

OR IF YOU'D PREFER

The Correlation between Pitches and Men

From 18-25 They are fastball, power pitchers. (Emphasis
on fast)

From 26-40 Finesse pitchers. Develop a great curve.

From 40-55 May need a little bit of artificial help for
the K

From 55 on Throw pure junk.
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Old 11-20-2005, 02:28 PM   #14
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Re: Geography lesson

Quote:
Originally posted by MadelynIris
[B]http://www.testic.co.uk/

The Geography of a Woman:




Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France or Argentina: She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq: She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.



I guess the whole premise
is a set up for the joke

that men are dicks

i have no problem with that.

but , I am dating a woman that is 39
and she is certainly not half-destroyed

and I know many women in the 40-50 that have lost nothing
and require no reconstruction


out of sensitivity to some of the women who look in this forum

i want to add
this is sophomoric humor
and I do not find it too cleaver

but, then again
i have been vacationing in France, Argentina, and Yugoslavia
and having the time of my life.

I am looking forward to Canada and Russia, too.
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Old 11-20-2005, 02:42 PM   #15
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Ah, you shame me, Deep. Beautifully said.
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