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Old 05-26-2005, 05:40 PM   #1
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Coach Who Waved Testicles at Losers Needed as GOP Senator

Coach Who Waved Testicles at Losers Needed as GOP Senator
May 26, 2005

RUSH: We've got a senator crying talking about sending a tough guy up to the United Nations. Did you hear about this baseball coach down in Coral Gables, Florida? Get this: "Gulliver prep baseball coach Lazer Collazo officially resigned Wednesday, a week after his alleged involvement of improper behavior towards his players came to light." You heard about this, Mr. Snerdley? "'I'm doing it for the kids. I'm doing it for the school,' Collazo told the Miami Herald yesterday morning. 'I'm not going to coach anymore at the high school or college level. I'm going to stay. I'm going to work at my Hardball Academy and that's all I have to say.'" That's an interesting name for his academy. "School officials said on Tuesday that the baseball coach Lazer Collazo had agreed to resign at the beginning of June. 'This is a resignation he's fully aware of,' said the public relations director Jen Vaida. According to a Coral Gables Police report the coach dropped his pants, took out his penis, and accused his players of not having the testicular fortitude it takes to play baseball, after a loss to Florida Christian on April the 7th." This guy has an academy called the Hardball Academy, and that's what he's going to go back to. "He then, according to a Coral Gables police report, after taking out his penis, pointed to his penis and his testicles and asked the team if they had a set of these or were they equipped with a vagina. Collazo who led Gulliver to the class AAA State Championship last season did not comment on the allegations." Now, I don't know what this guy's ideological leanings are, but I tell you, this is a conservative. We need to run this guy for the US Senate, ladies and gentlemen. This guy needs to be on our side in the US Senate. I mean, we could pretty much make the bet he's not a lib, right, because he has a penis and testicles. So this is a guy, you know, if the Republican Party is smart, there's an opening coming up.
Bill Nelson is going to be running for reelection as a Democrat in Florida, and we might want to start a PAC here for the former Gulliver prep baseball coach Lazer Collazo. Get somebody to run his Hardball Academy, whatever that is, probably a baseball school.

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Old 05-26-2005, 05:46 PM   #2
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Old 05-26-2005, 05:48 PM   #3
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Old 05-26-2005, 06:28 PM   #4
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my god, the sexism alone ...

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Old 05-26-2005, 06:30 PM   #5
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This is the second story like this I've heard this week. Some Chicago politician accused another of not having the 'testicular verillaty' needed to get the job done, of course he didn't whip it out.

I can't stand people who equate the terms used for women's genitalia with wimp.
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Old 05-26-2005, 07:13 PM   #6
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Originally posted by BonoVoxSupastar
I can't stand people who equate the terms used for women's genitalia with wimp.
I wonder how wimpy a woman is considered to be by others when she gives birth... That alone should stop others from affiliating that word with cowardness.

I thought coaches always used words of encouragement...
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Old 05-26-2005, 07:35 PM   #7
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If he keeps whipping it out someone's eventually be ready for him with a pair of loppers and chop it off. We'll see who's tough then.
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Old 05-26-2005, 08:41 PM   #8
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Originally posted by Sevikins
I wonder how wimpy a woman is considered to be by others when she gives birth... That alone should stop others from affiliating that word with cowardness.

It's been a long time since I've listened to Rush Limbaugh (the only times I've ever heard his show is when I happend to be riding in a car with someone who was a fan and had to hear it), but he seems to be even more of a blight on humanity than ever.
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Old 05-26-2005, 09:29 PM   #9
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If you ask me baseball is the least 'manlyist' sport around!

You dont need no cock&balls to play that sport!
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Old 05-27-2005, 05:34 AM   #10
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Well, then why don't you stand in the batter's box while a 95 mph fastball is being hurled at you? Or maybe try fielding a scorching groundball with only a glove for protection? I have been hit with a baseball while fielding and hitting. Beleive me, it takes guts (maybe not literally balls though ).
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Old 05-27-2005, 06:02 AM   #11
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Oh you're such a man Rush, what a turn on

Maybe we should ask Daryn Kagan about Rush's
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Old 05-27-2005, 05:10 PM   #12
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Loreena Bobbit, a nation turns its lonely eyes to you....

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