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Old 08-11-2005, 08:03 AM   #1
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wink By Popular Request: The Manly Thread

Ok, so....let's dive in. I'll start that man thread

What makes a man manly? How do you know? What makes him less than a man?

Is a refusal to use violence "unmanly"?

Is being gay (I ask this because I damn sure know far too many folks out there believe this to be true)?

Being mannered? Calm? Gentle? Well-dressed? If so, why?

Do you have problems with what you take to be popular conceptions of manhood? Why so?

Some have suggested that partriarchy, a "John Wayne" type definition of manliness, is itself a cause of war. What say you?

Enjoy.
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Old 08-11-2005, 08:05 AM   #2
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thanks for taking the initiative ... i'll respond when i have more time to actually think through what i want to say (as opposed to firing off glib responses).
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Old 08-11-2005, 08:13 AM   #3
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This dude is a real man...



"Got a problem? Odds against you? Call The Equalizer"

Sometimes I wish I were Robert McCall, The Equalizer.
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Old 08-11-2005, 08:15 AM   #4
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I'll have to give it more thought as well but what first comes to mind is something I've said in here before...that I like my straight men a little bit gay and my gay men a little bit straight. To me the blend is very sexy and manly. I'll get more specific later when I have more time.
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Old 08-11-2005, 08:20 AM   #5
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I don't know what makes a man a real man. I have a few traits in my head but those refer more to being a good person (sincerity, kindness, honesty etc.). I don't know, the older I get the less worried I am about my masculinity. It really isn't an issue anymore.
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Old 08-11-2005, 08:21 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by DrTeeth
I don't know, the older I get the less worried I am about my masculinity. It really isn't an issue anymore.
...which makes you very manly
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Old 08-11-2005, 08:29 AM   #7
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i would say the combination of confidence and comfortableness in one's own skin is very masculine. sure, you might take good care of yourself and go to the gym and have a 3-step skin care routine, but it's done out of thoughts of self-improvement and personal care as opposed to trying to morph yourself into some sort of unattainable ideal or someone else's idea of what you should look like. it comes from a desire to be better, not fear of being less than perfect.
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Old 08-11-2005, 09:01 AM   #8
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I find any man manly when he treats women with respect, and isnt concerned about coming off manly all the time
Theres a lot more to it than that for me but its a good start.
I dont find men who try too hard to be manly all that...manly.
Just over macho and insecure.
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Old 08-11-2005, 09:03 AM   #9
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what comes to my mind...

kindness

gentleness

stands up for what he believes in

has true respect for women

is communicative..that whole "in touch w/ emotions" thing

sensitivity to the feelings of others

not overly obsessed w/ looks

confident but not arrogant, but insecurities are fine too..I have many and don't care much for men who are insensitive to that

peace loving, not violent

not afraid to be vulnerable

gives sincere compliments from the heart

also being a good father and/or husband

mature in ways that matter, but can still be silly and fun

good sense of humor
that's all for now, I can think of much more


Yes I have definite problems w/ stereotypical things considered "manly"- macho posturing type stuff is silly and annoying
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Old 08-11-2005, 09:19 AM   #10
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I'm going to tell you what the word manly honestly brings to mind for me. Note that these aren't traits that are necessary or even that positive in a man, just the meanings I tend to associate with manliness.

-tough guy attitude
-doesn't cry easily/not particularly sensitive
-into sports, both playing and watching
-drinking and gambling
-etc

Please no one jump down my throat, the question wasn't what you like in a man or what you think manliness should entail, only how you would define it.

And the answer to the question "Do you have problems with what you take to be popular conceptions of manhood?" is yes.
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Old 08-11-2005, 09:44 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally posted by VertigoGal


-drinking and gambling
-etc
drinking yes, but it depends on what. Drinking beer yes. Drinking fruity smirnoff type beverages, not so much.
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Old 08-11-2005, 09:51 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by VertigoGal
-tough guy attitude
-doesn't cry easily/not particularly sensitive
-into sports, both playing and watching
-drinking and gambling
-etc

You forgot smoking.

Remember Mick Jagger singing - 'He can't be a man 'cos he doesn't smoke the same cigarettes as me'
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Old 08-11-2005, 09:55 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by DrTeeth
I don't know, the older I get the less worried I am about my masculinity. It really isn't an issue anymore.

We just may have our definition.
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Old 08-11-2005, 10:11 AM   #14
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A man who is not afraid to make a commitment!!!


THREE CHREERS FOR THIS GUY




Quote:
3 Wives Greet British Man After Surgery

By CASSANDRA VINOGRAD

The Associated Press
Thursday, August 11, 2005; 9:52 AM

LONDON -- Some people bring flowers, others bring balloons. When Melvyn Reed's three wives showed up to visit him at the hospital, they brought an unexpected curtain call to his years as a double bigamist.

British police confirmed that after Melvyn Reed woke from his triple bypass heart operation earlier this year, his complicated marital affairs took a turn for a worse. All three of his spouses had turned up at the same time, despite his efforts to stagger their visits.

Media reports say that, upon realizing that something was amiss, the wives held a meeting in the parking lot, and learned that they were all married to the same man.
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Old 08-11-2005, 10:17 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally posted by DrTeeth

the older I get the less worried I am about my masculinity. It really isn't an issue anymore.



We have a winner
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