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Old 01-10-2008, 06:27 PM   #46
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So you guys would be A-OK with it if you found out your 14-year-old daughter was having a sexual relationship with her attractive male teacher?
Absolutely not.
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Old 01-10-2008, 06:29 PM   #47
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And if it were your 14-year-old son and a female teacher?
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Old 01-10-2008, 06:45 PM   #48
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Absolutely not.
You know it's because of the non-consenting that these laws are in place, because of the 14 year olds who need protecting. Everyone accepts that until it becomes something both parties want to do. It's similar to domestic violence and complicity. The double standard is one thing, but willingness to overlook this as criminal because there is consent kinda leaves me a bit dumbfounded.
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Old 01-10-2008, 07:17 PM   #49
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Originally posted by yolland
And if it were your 14-year-old son and a female teacher?
Well then it's hi-fives all around, apparently.
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Old 01-10-2008, 07:29 PM   #50
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Quote:
Originally posted by yolland
So you guys would be A-OK with it if you found out your 14-year-old daughter was having a sexual relationship with her attractive male teacher?
Absolutely not, but my personal opinion is that in this particular case the sentencing was fair and proportionate though I can certainly see the argument for a custodial sentence.

My somewhat facetious comment was just a bad taste joke.
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Old 01-10-2008, 07:46 PM   #51
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and then of course, what's sexual abuse?

the legal age of consent in manitoba currently stands at 14.
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Old 01-10-2008, 07:52 PM   #52
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Originally posted by yolland
And if it were your 14-year-old son and a female teacher?
Nope. But that is because he would be my son. Personally, as a 14 year old, I wouldn't mind being in bed with Pamela Rogers. But if it was my son, then no. But it is like for those who drank underage. Many teenagers and college kids drink, so did I. But would any of these kids want their own kids to drink? I don't think so.
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Old 01-10-2008, 07:54 PM   #53
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Quote:
Originally posted by Angela Harlem


You know it's because of the non-consenting that these laws are in place, because of the 14 year olds who need protecting. Everyone accepts that until it becomes something both parties want to do. It's similar to domestic violence and complicity. The double standard is one thing, but willingness to overlook this as criminal because there is consent kinda leaves me a bit dumbfounded.
I never said that the teachers shouldn't be guilty. All I did was post a picture of Pamela Rogers and said she is hot. And I agree, there is a double standard. And in this case, the double standard is against men and favors women. Don't know what else to say.
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Old 01-10-2008, 09:09 PM   #54
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OK. I guess I'm just puzzled as to why this case evoked repeated jokes about "hot" female teachers and repeated emphasis on how teenage boys are "horny" and have "hormones," whereas I've never seen those reactions to threads on legal cases where the genders are reversed. Sure, those two women are attractive and yes, of course plenty of 14-year-old boys would think it was cool to have sex with an attractive female teacher. So what? Plenty of male teachers are attractive too, and I can say with certainty from having known several that young-teen girls who have affairs with older males are also apt to see themselves (at least at the time) as Hot Shit for having won the sexual interest of an attractive adult man. No shocker there--teenagers, period, are longing for validation of themselves as sexual and social beings, enjoy fantasizing about sex with attractive adults as well as peers, and just in general are eager to prove that they're ready for the Big Time, that they stand out as special and different and 'not like other kids your age,' all of which *tends to* make them easier to manipulate. It's also my understanding, from what admittedly little I've read on the subject, that early-adolescent boys who have sexual relationships with adult women, just like their female counterparts, display as adults a significantly-higher-than-average tendency towards addictions, compulsive sexual behavior, and difficulty establishing and maintaining normal relationships with the opposite sex. It doesn't at all necessarily mean that they later come to see themselves as having been violently raped or anything like that.

Now if you believe that 14 is in fact an appropriate legal age of consent for sex with adults, that's a different matter. But I'm having trouble understanding the jokey and/or 'Well, teenage boys are horny' responses. Especially if you're going to advance the argument that there's an unfair bias in favor of women who molest boys at work here.
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Old 01-11-2008, 08:30 AM   #55
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But attractive men would seemingly still be held to the same standard as unattractive men, is the same true for women? Is an attractive woman less of a molester somehow in the eyes of some for some of the reasons alluded to in this thread? After all she's "too pretty for prison", and teenage boys want older hot chicks. We have to protect the teen girls even from attractive men, but somehow not the boys from the women (or is it only the hot ones)?
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Old 01-11-2008, 09:31 AM   #56
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I tend to suspect the operative assumptions here are ultimately more about boys vs. girls and how capable they respectively are of being meaningfully in control of their role in the situation, but obviously they do have differential consequences for the adults. If an attractive female molester's crimes are less likely to be taken seriously than an unattractive one's (per the original article), that's probably more because in the latter's case doubts are (finally) raised as to whether the boy might perhaps have been exploited after all--because why else would he want to sleep with a woman that ugly. An attractive male molester is unlikely to get that "benefit," because different assumptions are being made about his victim's sexual (im)maturity.
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Old 01-11-2008, 03:55 PM   #57
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Quote:
Originally posted by MrsSpringsteen
But attractive men would seemingly still be held to the same standard as unattractive men, is the same true for women? Is an attractive woman less of a molester somehow in the eyes of some for some of the reasons alluded to in this thread? After all she's "too pretty for prison", and teenage boys want older hot chicks. We have to protect the teen girls even from attractive men, but somehow not the boys from the women (or is it only the hot ones)?
Of course it's different if the woman in question is hot (not to me - speaking generally). The assumption will always be that if the older woman is "hot" then "what boy wouldn't want to whatever with her". If it was an unattractive female teacher (say she was a bit older, or heavy, whatever) then of course the reaction would be assumptions that she took advantage/manipulated the younger boy.

The question is, who's the victim in this double standard? On the surface it's the teen boy who's assumed to have "wanted it" because a, he's a boy and they're/we're all horndogs, and b, she's hot. But take it a bit further - what kind of ridiculous system of justice would give more prison time to a child molester because she was less attractive than another?

It seems like there are 2 issues being debated here. I think there's clearly a double standard re: sexual abuse of girls vs. abuse of boys by women. But I think many of the people minimizing this are doing it from a position that 14 should be old enough to consent, or is old enough to consent in some countries/provinces. But even if you want to argue that, I don't think you can ignore the authority dynamic; I'd say it's inappropriate at best for a college professor to have relation with his/her over-18 student.
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Old 01-15-2008, 07:00 PM   #58
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If the 14 year old boy went along with this sexual "affair" willingly then why all the fuss...if it was a girl she has the possibility of becoming pregnant, which makes for a much more serious situation. When I was 14 I would have loved to sleep with a girl that looks like the one in question...It would NOT have been molestation...I would have volunteered it. This is a non-issue. Start concentrating on real child molesters that abuse CHILDREN - this is where the real evil is...NOT with hot blonde twenty somethings fooling around with a willing 14 year old boy...Geez people, get your priorities straight.
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Old 01-15-2008, 07:19 PM   #59
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"Oh don't worry Dad! He's paying for birth control for me--naturally he doesn't want me getting pregnant, either."

Besides, if you're fine with your son doing it, then why not be a good dad and help out your daughter by paying for her birth control yourself?

Adult females, of course, can get pregnant too--just ask Mary Kay Letourneau.
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Old 01-15-2008, 07:24 PM   #60
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Quote:
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If the 14 year old boy went along with this sexual "affair" willingly then why all the fuss...if it was a girl she has the possibility of becoming pregnant, which makes for a much more serious situation. When I was 14 I would have loved to sleep with a girl that looks like the one in question...It would NOT have been molestation...I would have volunteered it. This is a non-issue. Start concentrating on real child molesters that abuse CHILDREN - this is where the real evil is...NOT with hot blonde twenty somethings fooling around with a willing 14 year old boy...Geez people, get your priorities straight.
Were you willing and capable -- financially, enotionally, etc. -- of being a father at 14?
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