Attorney: Female Child Molester "Too Pretty For Prison"

[A_Wanderer]

 

[A_Wanderer]

How do you know that? You are basing your opinion on a stereotype that doesn't apply to everyone and honestly is one reason why these women are getting away with what they are doing.

Getting a disease might even be a breeze relatively speaking when compared to the emotional damage that might be done. A 14 year old boy is still a child mentally and emotionally, I don't care how much sex he is having and with whom, even if it's consensual and with girls his age. So add an adult into the equation and an adult who is a teacher, well it sure seems like one big problem to me. Most 14 year old boys have no idea about the potential long term damage a situation like that can have on their future emotional lives, mental health, and in future relationships.

A stereotype

The major issue here is that it involved an abuse of authority, 14 is the age of consent in many European countries. I fail to see how this case warrants such harsh criticism and demands for "justice".

 

[nathan1977]

A stereotype

The major issue here is that it involved an abuse of authority, 14 is the age of consent in many European countries. I fail to see how this case warrants such harsh criticism and demands for "justice".

Because 14 is not the age of consent in this country. It was illegal.

If it was a 14 year old girl, would we be having this conversation? (I'm not sure why we're having it again. Slow day in FYM?)

 

[BVS]

She's back in the news:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/law/12/04/teacher.sex/index.html?iref=newssearch

 

[maycocksean]

She's back in the news:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/law/12/04/teacher.sex/index.html?iref=newssearch

Well she wouldn't be if she had been put in prison in the first place.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

At least it was non-sexual-but hey sexual with a boy is still ok when you're a hot blond teacher and all that..

 

[Moonlit_Angel]

I really hate that double standard. I know many teenage boys have their fantasies and all that, but whether he wanted it or not, the fact remains that since he was underage, it's illegal, and she should've been properly punished the first time for her crime. She shouldn't get a lighter sentence just 'cause she's a "hot" teacher. And she's stupid for getting herself caught again.

I just want to know why on earth I'm hearing about this sort of thing so often nowadays? Swear to god, every few months a new story like this pops up, it's insane. Yet we ban kids from giving their friends a quick hug at school.

Angela

 

[joyfulgirl]

But this underage girl will turn 18 on January 2 and insists there was nothing inappropriate about their conversation. Technically a teenager under 18, yes, and that means the terms of her probation were broken, but it sure is a gray area for me.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

(CNN) -- Debra Lafave, the former Florida middle school teacher convicted of having sex with a student, violated her probation by hugging a young co-worker, a Florida judge found Thursday.

But the judge did not send Lafave to jail, saying the violation was "not willful and substantial."

"Please don't come back," he scolded.

Dressed in a severely tailored black pantsuit, Lafave said she had "innocent" physical contact with a female co-worker she knew as under age 18.

At the time, she and the 17-year-old hostess worked at Danny Boy's, a small restaurant in the Tampa, Florida, area.

Lafave, 27, pleaded guilty in November 2005 to having sex with a 14-year-old boy and was sentenced to three years under house arrest and seven years of probation.

Lafave was required to register as a sex offender and ordered not to have any contact with minors. A tracking device she carries as part of her probation went off in court, prompting the prosecutor to observe, "I think she's accounted for."

Lafave acknowledged she was aware that hugs and other forms of physical contact -- as well as conversations about sex -- with minors violated terms of her probation. She referred to the sexually explicit conversations at work as just "girl talk."

Lafave denied talking about her sex life with co-workers. "I don't speak that way about my personal life," she said. But she added that her co-workers spoke freely about sex in a "small group setting."

While other co-workers socialized outside work, Lafave said, the 17-year-old was not included in those outings.

Asked why she hugged the young co-worker, Lafave explained it was a small restaurant with a casual atmosphere where co-workers felt like family. The contact came, she said, "out of my good nature, that's the way it worked."

The contacts that led to Thursday's probation violation hearing first surfaced during two polygraph tests administered as part of Lafave's court-ordered supervision.

She received a verbal reprimand a year ago, according to testimony. When the behavior continued, her probation officer asked a judge to find her in violation.

She was ordered to quit the restaurant job and now works as a receptionist in her mother's beauty shop.

In the past, Lafave has said she suffers from bipolar disorder and is receiving treatment.

 

[Infinity]

She may be pretty, but she's no Pamela Rogers.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

So it's drool over child molesters time?

 

[Infinity]

Sure it's a "double standard". So what.
It all depends on the 14 year old boys state of mind. Was he tricked into having sex - I highly doubt it. Was he molested, drugged, or fooled in any way??? Probably not. I know it's been said far too many times but there is real truth in this...I wish I had had the opportunity to score with an older babe when I was 14!!! Sorry folks but it's the truth. Most 14 year old boys would.
Now the difference between a man and a girl and a woman and a boy - the biggest differences are... the boy most likely really wanted to have sex with this "older woman" (not that there aren't cases that are similar involving girls) - the huge difference is that the 14 year old boy COULD NOT GET PREGANT therefore it is not as serious as it would be if a pregancy was involved. That is number 1 in my books. I guess the "older woman" could of gotten pregnant but oh well, at least she's not 14. It's the oldest double standard in the book and will always be that way no matter how many Nancy Graces there are telling us otherwise. Unless it is UNWANTED sex (big fat ugly psycho teacher molesting 14 year old boy) and if indeed it was MUTUAL then leave it alone and start concentrating on the real pedophiles out there - ones who harm CHILDREN and not horny 14 year old boys!!!

 

[Infinity]

So it's drool over child molesters time?

It doesn't change the fact that she is hot. I woulda loved to get with Pamela Rogers when I was 14. Or any age for that matter.

 

[financeguy]

So it's drool over child molesters time?

It's a case of GBH (Guilty But Hot).

 

[yolland]

So you guys would be A-OK with it if you found out your 14-year-old daughter was having a sexual relationship with her attractive male teacher?

 

[Infinity]

So you guys would be A-OK with it if you found out your 14-year-old daughter was having a sexual relationship with her attractive male teacher?

Absolutely not.

 

[yolland]

And if it were your 14-year-old son and a female teacher?

 

[Angela Harlem]

Absolutely not.

You know it's because of the non-consenting that these laws are in place, because of the 14 year olds who need protecting. Everyone accepts that until it becomes something both parties want to do. It's similar to domestic violence and complicity. The double standard is one thing, but willingness to overlook this as criminal because there is consent kinda leaves me a bit dumbfounded.

 

[Diemen]

And if it were your 14-year-old son and a female teacher?

Well then it's hi-fives all around, apparently.

 

[financeguy]

So you guys would be A-OK with it if you found out your 14-year-old daughter was having a sexual relationship with her attractive male teacher?

Absolutely not, but my personal opinion is that in this particular case the sentencing was fair and proportionate though I can certainly see the argument for a custodial sentence.

My somewhat facetious comment was just a bad taste joke.

 

[Zoomerang96]

and then of course, what's sexual abuse?

the legal age of consent in manitoba currently stands at 14.

 

[Infinity]

And if it were your 14-year-old son and a female teacher?

Nope. But that is because he would be my son. Personally, as a 14 year old, I wouldn't mind being in bed with Pamela Rogers. But if it was my son, then no. But it is like for those who drank underage. Many teenagers and college kids drink, so did I. But would any of these kids want their own kids to drink? I don't think so.

 

[Infinity]

You know it's because of the non-consenting that these laws are in place, because of the 14 year olds who need protecting. Everyone accepts that until it becomes something both parties want to do. It's similar to domestic violence and complicity. The double standard is one thing, but willingness to overlook this as criminal because there is consent kinda leaves me a bit dumbfounded.

I never said that the teachers shouldn't be guilty. All I did was post a picture of Pamela Rogers and said she is hot. And I agree, there is a double standard. And in this case, the double standard is against men and favors women. Don't know what else to say.

 

[yolland]

OK. I guess I'm just puzzled as to why this case evoked repeated jokes about "hot" female teachers and repeated emphasis on how teenage boys are "horny" and have "hormones," whereas I've never seen those reactions to threads on legal cases where the genders are reversed. Sure, those two women are attractive and yes, of course plenty of 14-year-old boys would think it was cool to have sex with an attractive female teacher. So what? Plenty of male teachers are attractive too, and I can say with certainty from having known several that young-teen girls who have affairs with older males are also apt to see themselves (at least at the time) as Hot Shit for having won the sexual interest of an attractive adult man. No shocker there--teenagers, period, are longing for validation of themselves as sexual and social beings, enjoy fantasizing about sex with attractive adults as well as peers, and just in general are eager to prove that they're ready for the Big Time, that they stand out as special and different and 'not like other kids your age,' all of which *tends to* make them easier to manipulate. It's also my understanding, from what admittedly little I've read on the subject, that early-adolescent boys who have sexual relationships with adult women, just like their female counterparts, display as adults a significantly-higher-than-average tendency towards addictions, compulsive sexual behavior, and difficulty establishing and maintaining normal relationships with the opposite sex. It doesn't at all necessarily mean that they later come to see themselves as having been violently raped or anything like that.

Now if you believe that 14 is in fact an appropriate legal age of consent for sex with adults, that's a different matter. But I'm having trouble understanding the jokey and/or 'Well, teenage boys are horny' responses. Especially if you're going to advance the argument that there's an unfair bias in favor of women who molest boys at work here.

 

[MrsSpringsteen]

But attractive men would seemingly still be held to the same standard as unattractive men, is the same true for women? Is an attractive woman less of a molester somehow in the eyes of some for some of the reasons alluded to in this thread? After all she's "too pretty for prison", and teenage boys want older hot chicks. We have to protect the teen girls even from attractive men, but somehow not the boys from the women (or is it only the hot ones)?

 

[yolland]

I tend to suspect the operative assumptions here are ultimately more about boys vs. girls and how capable they respectively are of being meaningfully in control of their role in the situation, but obviously they do have differential consequences for the adults. If an attractive female molester's crimes are less likely to be taken seriously than an unattractive one's (per the original article), that's probably more because in the latter's case doubts are (finally) raised as to whether the boy might perhaps have been exploited after all--because why else would he want to sleep with a woman that ugly. An attractive male molester is unlikely to get that "benefit," because different assumptions are being made about his victim's sexual (im)maturity.

 

[CTU2fan]

But attractive men would seemingly still be held to the same standard as unattractive men, is the same true for women? Is an attractive woman less of a molester somehow in the eyes of some for some of the reasons alluded to in this thread? After all she's "too pretty for prison", and teenage boys want older hot chicks. We have to protect the teen girls even from attractive men, but somehow not the boys from the women (or is it only the hot ones)?

Of course it's different if the woman in question is hot (not to me - speaking generally). The assumption will always be that if the older woman is "hot" then "what boy wouldn't want to whatever with her". If it was an unattractive female teacher (say she was a bit older, or heavy, whatever) then of course the reaction would be assumptions that she took advantage/manipulated the younger boy.

The question is, who's the victim in this double standard? On the surface it's the teen boy who's assumed to have "wanted it" because a, he's a boy and they're/we're all horndogs, and b, she's hot. But take it a bit further - what kind of ridiculous system of justice would give more prison time to a child molester because she was less attractive than another?

It seems like there are 2 issues being debated here. I think there's clearly a double standard re: sexual abuse of girls vs. abuse of boys by women. But I think many of the people minimizing this are doing it from a position that 14 should be old enough to consent, or is old enough to consent in some countries/provinces. But even if you want to argue that, I don't think you can ignore the authority dynamic; I'd say it's inappropriate at best for a college professor to have relation with his/her over-18 student.

 

[Harry Vest]

If the 14 year old boy went along with this sexual "affair" willingly then why all the fuss...if it was a girl she has the possibility of becoming pregnant, which makes for a much more serious situation. When I was 14 I would have loved to sleep with a girl that looks like the one in question...It would NOT have been molestation...I would have volunteered it. This is a non-issue. Start concentrating on real child molesters that abuse CHILDREN - this is where the real evil is...NOT with hot blonde twenty somethings fooling around with a willing 14 year old boy...Geez people, get your priorities straight.

 

[yolland]

"Oh don't worry Dad! He's paying for birth control for me--naturally he doesn't want me getting pregnant, either."

Besides, if you're fine with your son doing it, then why not be a good dad and help out your daughter by paying for her birth control yourself?

Adult females, of course, can get pregnant too--just ask Mary Kay Letourneau.

 

[indra]

If the 14 year old boy went along with this sexual "affair" willingly then why all the fuss...if it was a girl she has the possibility of becoming pregnant, which makes for a much more serious situation. When I was 14 I would have loved to sleep with a girl that looks like the one in question...It would NOT have been molestation...I would have volunteered it. This is a non-issue. Start concentrating on real child molesters that abuse CHILDREN - this is where the real evil is...NOT with hot blonde twenty somethings fooling around with a willing 14 year old boy...Geez people, get your priorities straight.

Were you willing and capable -- financially, enotionally, etc. -- of being a father at 14?