sulawesigirl4
Rock n' Roll Doggie ALL ACCESS
maycocksean said:Tough decisions, no doubt. Again, as Yolland said you'd probably have more insight than I would since my wife and I don't have kids yet. But of course, if you know me, I have an opinion anyway. I know it's hard for American kids to grow up outside of America and then return and deal with adjusting, but just because something's hard and sometimes painful doesn't make it bad. I also think it's hard for kids who are raised in a mixed-race home (I did, and my children will too, as I am black and my wife is white). But in both cases, the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. Both my wife and I WANT our kids to spend some time outside of the U.S. during their childhoods. We want them to have a broader perspective of the world, and while that may make them a little "different" compared to kids born and raised in America, I think in the long run, they will benefit. (You can confirm or deny whether this is so, I suppose).
I definitely feel that the benefits outweigh any disadvantages. Looking back I wouldn't choose to have been brought up exclusively in the U.S. I know it sounds horribly arrogant, but I love the fact that I have seen so much of the world and that my mind was broadened at a very young age. I love speaking multiple languages, having friends from every continent and being able to put a backstory to the news headlines. What is hard about it of course is in trying to relate to Americans who have never been outside of their city, state, country and whose perceptions of the outside world have been gleaned from Hollywood movies and the propaganda that masquerades as "news" here. If I had a dime for how many times I have been asked questions to the effect of do I feel deprived for having not grown up in the "greatest country in the world" etc. I would be quite rich. To be quite honest, I hate living in America. I like to visit and I can't say I don't enjoy indulging in the luxuries that are taken for granted here, but I never feel at home knowing what else is going on in the wider world. So perhaps that's a good thing or a bad thing. In a way, there would be those that blame my parents for "ruining" me so that I'll never be able to live comfortably in what is supposedly my "home" country. However, I think that TCKs are uniquely prepared for the next century, that of globalization and internationalization. We tend to think of ourselves as world citizens and not define ourselves narrowly by pre-conceived notions of nation-state identity.
In your case, your children will be even more well-equiped to have a diverse view of the world and of society because as you've mentioned, they'll be living in a mixed race family. I think this is great although I can imagine it will bring its own set of challenges. I can relate in a way because my serious boyfriend is black and I am white; we also have a mixed religious background in that he is Muslim and I am Christian. If we stay together longterm we'd like to live and work in the 3rd world doing aid work, etc. Any children we have are going to be multi-cultural, multi-lingual, etc. I'm jealous for them. lol.
In summary, I think living overseas and giving your children a cross-cultural immersion experience during their formative years is one of the greatest gifts a parent can give. It will give your children a competitive advantage for their future lives and careers because in the world we live in being able to communicate and work in a multi-cultural world is essential. And besides it will also give them awesome memories and stories to carry with them the rest of their lives.